Thread by @JulieTheCranky

2021 Emmys. #FashionWatch

A few words since there's been some discussion and confusion. First, I don't watch TV, movies, much or pop culture, and am on YT for watercolor. I don't know who most of these people are. Blind reviews are both good and bad and I acknowledge that.

There was a comment in the Met Gala thread about false breasts; I had meant artificial as in costuming, not a boob job. My goal is not body-shaming and if it comes across that way I apologize. It is not my intent. But I often don't know who these folks are at home, so to speak.

Cher once said she got a nose job because she saw herself on a billboard and she really didn't like how it looked. And I thought that was brutally honest and respected the hell out of that. If you want to rebuild yourself to make yourself happy, you do you.

Mostly, I'm here for the dresses.

Mj Rodriguez in Atelier Versace. The color is fab on her, she's RIPPED, and she's wearing a necklace! The lopsided boob issue is entirely on Versace and something they're known for. GREAT color for her.

Samira Wiley wearing a Genny suit, Sophia Webster heels, and Lark & Berry jewelry. If you're gonna wear a black suit, at least it's got some pattern to it. Plus makeup and good shoes. The men could take lessons. The pants cuffs are interesting.

For now, data's coming off Pop Sugar, will report if/when that changes.

All these awards shows in the autumn are fucking up my system. Anyway.

Emma Corrin. Who did the bath caps and gloves this year, was it Valentino? Site doesn't say.

Women are told that neutrals like this make everyone notice the real them. It's a dirty, rotten lie. Just no.

Yara Shahidi wearing Dior Haute Couture.

Mark your calendars, Dior got one right. And the jewelry is lovely too. She looks great. In Dior. Please let this be an open for the rest of the night.

Leon Bridges in black, but it's zingy black with decorations and a necklace, so okay.

Kaley Cuoco in a color she was insane to try to wear. Make it another more flattering color, put on a damn necklace, and I think it'd be great.

...the uneven ruffles on the straps are bugging the shit out of me but that's on the designer, whoever that was.

Beth Behrs in a whole lotta pink and glitter. I wish it were a little darker, it'd suit her better. But if someone wants to go fairy princess on a red carpet? Go for it. It's fun, and pretty. (Just two shades darker on the pink.)

Jessica Long wearing her Olympic medal, I think that's the ultimate accessory? She looks lovely. Not 100% wild about the dress, but I don't think red carpets are her usual so she's doing great.

Disability represent, YO! Thank you!

Elizabeth Olsen wearing The Row. Which is owned by her twin sisters. (Yes, the Olsen Twins are her sisters.)

You'd think they could do better than this. Helen Mirren dresses younger than this, come ON.

Susan Kelechi-Watson wearing a Markarian dress. Fun, sparkly, flattering, and looks comfortable for a jillion-hour awards show. Total win!

Just mentally tack on 'and wear a necklace' for everything that needs one.

Mandy Moore in red. The color's great on her, the fit is iffy, and the construction below the waist is... a mistake. Shame on the designer. This could have been a total winner.

Taraji P. Henson wearing an Elie Saab dress and looking like her best self, as always. Is black and white her usual? Or just a choice for the evening. Either way it's fabulous.

Just a brightly jeweled necklace to finish it, like icing. Please?

Madeline Brewer in heavy, droopy brown. The color's good on her, but the fit isn't. And random blue shoes? Maybe with sapphire jewelry?

Cynthia Erivo. Fierce, beautiful, and fabulous, as always. (Fierce meant in the best way.)

Kathryn Hahn in Balmain.

There was a reason I didn't do their collection this season.

Points for the necklace.

Great shoes, though.

Jennifer Coolidge wearing Christian Siriano.

I repeat my long-standing opinion that the only point of black dresses like this is to show off millions of dollars in diamonds.

Aidy Bryant wearing custom Simone Rocha.

Rocha needs their ass beat. It looks like a deliberate attempt to make the wearer seem as large as possible. The ruffles, all the emphasis at the hips, all of it.

His highness Billy Porter wearing Ashi Studio Couture and making my point about the black and the diamonds. The ear-climbers are fab.

Ashi is known for playing with silhouette, which we obviously see here.

Olivia Colman wearing Roksanda. -sigh- The cape is a lot, and the jewelry is minimal, but it could be a lot worse so okay.

Rachel Lindsay wearing Christopher John Rogers. Fantastic color on her, really looks great.

Needs a necklace. Sorry, I can't hold it in. Just slap a bunch of turquoise on there and we're good.

I'M SORRY I CAN'T HELP IT.

Emerald Fennell wearing Valentino who really should have to answer some hard questions after this last collection.

Cecily Strong doing the one-leg thing. Kiddo, that was old before Maleficent did it. Borrow some diamonds, put on some fishnets, it'll be a lot more interesting.

Seth Rogan in it's not black but I can't even.

Hannah Einbinder in a solid dress. Just... two shades darker on the pink. You're disappearing into it.

And jewelry. I CAN'T HELP IT.

Bowen Yang in... something. Black.

Carl Clemons-Hopkins, definitely coloring outside the lines, thank you sir.

Trevor Noah in COME ON DUDE SOME COLOR OR PATTERN WON'T HURT.

Kate Winslet who should have worn the Heart of the Ocean or whatever the fuck that was. Or any other necklace, come on, she's Kate Winslet, I'm sure Harry Winston will take her calls.

Catherine Zeta-Jones wearing color AND jewelry, 'cause woman knows how to dress for an awards show, THANK YOU.

And even though she's doing the Leg Thang, she's got a dress with a little ruffle in the right place so she and we don't have to worry about anything ELSE showing.

Leila Cohan-Miccio.

Ladies, repeat after me: Black isn't slimming, it's just black. A jewel tone would make her skin glow, and the right green would also bring out the lovely color of her hair. -sigh-

Still can't help it.

First person to say 'vulva' is getting their ass kicked.

Jamie Lee in space age from the sixties.

I have no idea. But that big horizontal wrinkle isn't doing her any favors. Someone whap the designer, they earned it with the sleeve anyway.

Rita Wilson wearing Tom Ford. And some necklaces!

She's looking pretty good, I hope she's feeling well after the COVID thing. If she's gotta wear a black suit, she glittered it up.

Poking around the Guardian's coverage now.

Variety is better.

Jason Sudeikis in Tom Ford and not black, thank you.

Rosie Perez looking fabulous. See how it's not EXACTLY the same tone as her skin? And has beads on it? That's how it's supposed to work.

Billy Porter again because I can.

I want to know who made that necklace. And for him to give jewelry lessons to everyone else.

Robin Thede. It's a little prom-adjacent, but it's a great color on her, and she looks lovely.

Josh O’Connor.

-heavy sigh-

Nicole Byer. It's a whole lotta look, but she's pulling it off. Color's fantastic.

Kenan Thompson in not black, hooray!

Anthony Anderson in a dinner jacket that's not black, and I think otherwise traditional black and white. See how easy that is? Looks great, kind of adventurous, but you're still in a tux.

Hannah Einbinder in a slightly better shot of that pink dress, I think the other one was over-exposed.

Karamo Brown in black, but it's velvet, and a point for the brooch.

Jac Schaeffer in a gown that fits, and looks great! Patterns are tricky on red carpets (there's a reason so many women wear solid colors) but this is great.

Zuri Hall and Scott Evans. Her gown's already wrinkled, but he's wearing not-black and accented with color so I'm going with it.

Brendan Hunt and Shannon Nelson. He's edging into costume territory but clearly having fun with it, and her dress looks great.

Josh Heald, Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg in black. -snore-

Cat M. Sullivan, Patrick Doody and Shea Spencer. I want to know more about the dress on the far right. I think I like it.

Nischelle Turner and Kevin Frazier. Bet you the dress/gown is Christopher John Rogers. The tux is saved by the tie and pin. Barely.

'The Amber Ruffin Show’ Writers and Cast. Lots of color, lots of happy. Winner.

Cedric the Entertainer in not black as always. Thank you sir. Love the color this year, looks great.

Individual photos, okay, this is Amber Ruffin, still looking good. Brocades are hard to wear but she's pulling it off.

Ashley Nicole Black in Natalie Mills. Pink and orange, yeah!! And she looks great.

Ariel Dumas in red. See how the blue is echoed in the purse and earrings? Just not random shoes? So much better. Fun dress.

Chris Sullivan and Rachel Sullivan. Taken individually they're great, but together my eyes kinda crossed. More women need to go for suits like this, if they've gotta wear suits.

John Oliver in black because apparently all the evening show hosts lack imagination.

Daniel Dae Kim. -sigh- At least it's a great fit.

GaTa and Lil Dicky.

Okay then.

Ann Dowd. -sigh-

Annaleigh Ashford. Great idea, iffily executed.

Good shoes, though.

Akilah Green looking good in a whole lotta sequins. I love the whole look.

Angela Bassett in what might be custom Schiaparelli, but as always she looks fantastic.

Dan Levy. Is a blue bathrobe better than a black tux? I say yes.

Eugene Levy. Odds the tux is older than my kid?

Jean Smart looking great! With earrings!

Maya Erskine in a decently fitted but plain outfit... they're calling it gingham, which I don't think is the way to go on a red carpet.

Mindy Kaling who got the memo on the black dress and the diamonds.

She always looks like she knows she's on a red carpet.

Tracee Ellis Ross, who knows how to dress.

Allison Janney. It's drapey and asymmetric, and the earrings are great and I hope she doesn't get heat stroke before the night is out.

America Ferrera who also seems to know when she's on a red carpet. Love the contrasting earrings. Wish there was a matching necklace, I CAN'T HELP IT.

Amy Poehler, who needs to hire who ever was styling her for awards show hosting.

Catherine O’Hara and Annie Murphy, sweet photo. The green needs fitted a tad, but if they're going for comfort - I don't blame anyone for that at an awards show - they did well.

COME ON.

Issa Rae.

It could be a lot worse.

Jurnee Smollett. Kinda like a banshee, but that's not a bad look for a red carpet.

Regé-Jean Page. It's double-breasted, I should probably give points for that, but. Come on dude, just get some color in there SOMEWHERE.

And in closing, Sarah Paulson, who really needs to stay the hell away from Valentino, but at least she didn't wear the gloves. The end.