Thread by @StillDelvingH

Theatre time with my 9 yrs old class

(I hadn’t planned for the super spreading factor of this event, boosted by employees unable to put their mask on their nose making a 100 kids or so wait in the hall for half an hour)

The play’d better be good

*TEACHERS ARE HEROES*

My god it was atrocious

This is one of the worst thing I've seen -ever
The actors & FX girl were OK -but if they had anything to do with the script they are guilty as sin
It was

It starts with two school bullies sending their teacher/head of school to an asylum because they wouldn't stop asking "why" every 5 seconds (they *were* annoying)
Teacher ends up in a sandpit mooing while eating sand.
It's very funny for the bullies.

Then arrives the new head of school: A troll.
He eats a child emboldened by the bullies to attempt to bully the troll with "whys". Kudos on the crushing bone sound effects, quite realistic.
Then school is turned into a gold mine so the troll can have a statue.

The troll warns the kids being nasty will be punished. The evil twins -the 2 heroes- can't let that stop them being bullies
So they put an earthworm in a kid's sandwich
So the troll eat *that* kid
The twin feel bad but not too much as the kid didn't like them (go figure out why)

Then the heroes put a slug in a girl's hair. The girl gets eaten too. Does it stop the heroes? No. Then they put mud (I think?) in a teacher's shoes. So because all these things are privileges than only the troll can enjoy, he eats the teacher as well (more bone crushing sounds!)

Note that in between condemning to death their classmates and teacher, the twins try to warn their mum, the school inspector, the police, the president.. No one believes them.
So the boy twin learns troll language
As trolls don't exist but troll language books do
Because why not

Then the boy talks to the troll
He explains putting earthworms in people's sandwiches and slugs in their hair is kid's nature. The troll explains eating kids is his nature. He goes to eat them, but realises he admires them instead & then the twin bullies get a giant gold statue🤷‍♀️

I mean I'm still

When we left, the half-masked theatre employees, very sorry we couldn't stay to chat with the psycho company as they were half an hour late, kindly offered that we come back tomorrow and pay to see the whole thing *again*
Gee thanks 😬