Jim Mortleman Profile picture
IT journo, writer, parodist; punster; puzzler; potty-mouth; penner of odes; podcaster (@stupidqubit); free thinker; synth tinkerer; dad; hat fan

Jun 20, 2022, 8 tweets

TORIES ON DRUGS

An Ode

With (heavily curated) illustrative assistance from #dallemini

(Thread)

#ukpolitics #satire

Top of a poll of the Brits' figureheads,
All the while Winnie was popping the reds...

And before he became the UK's top book-cooker,
Osborne was snapped snorting coke with a hooker...

Rory, a Tory who oozes uprightness,
Only tried opium out of politeness...

Andrea Leadsom, who wanted to lead,
Fessed up she once was a demon for weed...

Dominic Raab, who would NOT be outdone,
Said, "I tonked bliff, too, but only the one..."

Gove's done the lot, what a libertine knave!
Does not even know how he GOT to that rave...

The PM, of course, chucked the charlie long ago...
So any sinus trouble's unconnected, don't you know!

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