Thread by @rikkainhaz

Okok but hear me out:
#chengxian JC waking up with a terrible headache to find himself in bed with who must be another man, judging by the hair and broad shoulders. There is an inexplicable pain in an area he’d never imagine could hurt this bad—

yes, his asshole feels like it’s been split into two. He glares at the man slumbering by his side. How dare he give him this much pain, he’s going to /kick/ him. And so JC does, violently kicking the sleeping man off the bed with a thud.

There is a groan, that sent

shivers down JC’s spine at the familiarity, his mind pulling up lost images from the night before. Nope, do NOT think about that. Focus on the current problem. Who is he and also what is that on his finger?

As JC peers over the edge of the bed, he sees the sparkling

glint of a ring on the man’s finger and JC has a shell-shock moment because not only did he sleep with a man! A married man! Oh no! He’s an adulterer!! 😱😱

As he’s about to start chewing on the blankets in anxiety, he notices a ring on his own finger and that’s when he screams

Screw the headache, screw the ache in his body—what in everlasting hell is going on???!!!

The man finally pushes himself off the floor into a sitting position. His hand lifts the hair away from his face and now JC is staring into the wide eyes of his childhood friend WWX.

Fuck.

They both thought.

-tbc?????-

JC hasn’t seen WWX since they went separate ways in university. Last he knew through the grapevine, WWX was off in another city, far from home.

So what is he doing /here/, in bed with him, and supposedly MARRIED TO JC???

“First off,” JC says, holding his head. “Whatever this—“

He gestures with flying hands. “This cannot be real. We got drunk, did stupid things. Got matching rings, so what, people do dumb shit. It’s not permanent. Right?”

Unfortunately, his efforts of denial is shattered when WWX pulls out a red book from his pants pocket,

their clothes were in an untidy pile on the floor—yet another crime in JC’s ever going list.

“We’re married, JC,” WWX says with a little disbelieving laugh.

“Ok,” JC’s voice went an octave higher. “So it’s real. We can annul it. No big deal. What time is it. Let’s go.”

As JC crawls on the bed, WWX gets an eyeful of his ass on full display and turns red—as red as the skin of JC’s bum—is that, is that a handprint?!?!

WWX gulps and turns away, pretending to busy himself with untangling their clothes while his mind

tries to fill in the blanks now in his awakened state.

A smartphone falls onto the carpet and on the lit screen, WWX sees a bombardment of notifications and curses immediately.

“Jiang Cheng…”

“What,” JC grumbles, stepping gingerly on the floor, holding his waist.

“I don’t think this is something we can just ignore.”

WWX scrolls through his social media and wonders how so much happened in one night. Surely he didn’t black out for more than one.

Even if he did, from what he knew of JC, there was just no possibility.

Pictures after pictures fill his phone gallery, of him and JC squished up to each other to get into the frame, faces flushed red from alcohol.

How did they get /this/ drunk?

WWX vaguely recalls seeing JC across the bar last night, when he joined his coworker

in their celebratory drink after closing a deal with a huge client earlier. He hadn’t stepped into Yunmeng since he was 18, going off onto greater pastures he had called it with an idealistic mindset.

He had said goodbye to everything he called home and left without looking

back.

Because he knew if he did, he would want to stay.

He never did have a proper farewell with JC.

A phone call disrupts his thoughts and WWX picks up, intensely aware of the rustling coming from JC wearing his clothes.

“You finally picked up! Where the fuck have you been?? What the fuck happened?? Who’s that in your pictures—fuck you got a lot of explaining—“ Wen Qing yells at him

“Wen Qing, I have no idea what’s going on either.”

“…fuck. It’s all over, everyone fucking knows,

you posted on every single social media you own like a fool…”

“Wait everyone, you mean—“

“Yeah. Lan Wangji knows.”

WWX doesn’t know what to say. Wen Qing sighs over the line and says, “you…handle it yourself…”

(I couldn’t resist #cuckji)

“Wei Wuxian? What are you doing just standing there. Get dressed and let’s go to the bureau,” JC snaps his fingers in front of WWX’s face.

Their clothes are crumpled and it’s definitely not the neatest JC has ever been seen in public but he’ll make do. Anything to get out

of this mess as quickly as possible.

“Jiang Cheng…” WWX near cries, his head drooping down like a wilting flower. “You…look at your phone…we made a huge mistake.”

“Wha—“ JC begins when the vibrating of his phone interrupts. He looks down and sees the name ‘Niang’ flashing on the screen.

WWX turns pale in front of him, white as the sheets on the bed. JC narrows his eyes and mimes for silence, pressing his finger on the screen.

Before he can even get a word out, his mother’s voice booms through the speakers: “JIANG CHENG GET YOUR ASS BACK HOME NOW! AND BRING THAT STINKY CHILD WEI WUXIAN WITH YOU”

She hangs up before JC could even blink.

“What’s that about?”

WWX gives him a watery eyed smile, “Madam Yu is going to kill me.”

JC gives him a once over and huffs, “how long do you intend on being naked.”

“It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.” At JC’s glare, WWX winces. “Too soon?”

“Too soon.”

Once WWX is dressed and ready to go, they miraculously find JC’s car sitting in the parking lot of the hotel they were in. WWX fiddles with his phone with a nervous expression in the passenger seat while JC frowns at the wheel.

“Why aren’t you driving?” WWX asks distractedly.

“My ass is on fire,” JC admits with a glower. “This is entirely your fault.”

“We both have no idea what happened and you’re blaming /me/. Real smart.”

“Then who else am I supposed to blame!”

WWX sighs, problems just keeps piling up. He’s frantically deleted every single post he made but the comments and questions from his friends and acquaintances were never ending. He didn’t know what to say. Lan Zhan wasn’t replying to him either.

Now he has Madam Yu on his heels, and JC still seems oblivious to the fire engulfing the two of them.

“Just—just go,” he says. “To the civil affairs bureau or to Lotus Pier wherever. Just. Go. We’re fucked either way. An annulment isn’t going to solve anything—

—heck I don’t even know if we can even get one at this point.”

“Why not?”

“Your face is plastered all over the tabloids!” WWX grits.

“WHAT!” JC exclaims, scrambling over to WWX’s side of the car, ripping his phone from his hands.

It speaks volumes about the way JC was able to unlock his phone with ease, as though they haven’t been separated for the past 7 years.

“Fuck.”

“Yes, fuck. So let’s just—I don’t know.”

JC tosses WWX’s phone back on his lap. Immediately, text messages from Wen Qing pour in.

/really, the Jiangs? Since when were you into old money?/

JC taps his finger on the steering wheel, his face as black as the night. His ringtone fills the otherwise silent car and this time the name flashes “Father”.

He ignores it, squirming at the burning sensation at his bum.

Eventually, the contact on the screen changes to “A-Jie” and JC couldn’t reject this one. Damn the soft spot he has for his sister.

“A-Cheng, where are you? Are you ok?”

“Jie…how mad is Niang?”

“…you should come home first…is A-Xian with you?”

JC exchange glances with WWX who shrugged in response. “…yes.”

In the background of JYL, they hear YZY nagging, “where are these two rascals, dare to get married without notice?!”

Doomed. It was time to face the music, JC tells JYL, “we’re on the way…can you…calm Niang down

a bit before we arrive..?” he adds with hope.

-

WWX finds himself kneeling in front of YZY and JFM with JC like they were 10 all over again, as YZY paces the room lecturing her mouth dry.

It was comforting in a way that some things never change, despite his life

turning over on itself in multiple ways.

Madam Yu coughs mid-tirade and JFM quickly intercepts, “Sanniang, they are old enough to make their decision. A-Xian, A-Cheng, it’s your choice, but you really should have told us beforehand rather than let us find out from

the media.”

JC buries into himself at the disapproving tone. WWX feels the long forgotten instinctual urge to comfort JC.

“—told you, I expected this. Wei Wuxian left and Jiang Cheng never brought anyone over to meet us. I told you JFM!”

(Basically, YZY was ranting about

how she called it. She knew the two had a thing since way back—no they didnt. The Jiangs are 100% convinced that JC and WWX were in a secret relationship the whole time.)

“We need to make this right. We are going to have a ceremony and you two are going to like it, or else!”

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(I’m honestly starting to find a lot of plot holes but I’m writing this without much thought and absolutely 0 planning 😂😂😂 if it comes down to it, I might find the energy to edit it into a proper full fic but that time will come when it comes.)