You all know the legend of Italian nutcase Mario Balotelli. From lobbing darts at teammates to burning his own house down, the striker wreaks havoc wherever he goes.
But you haven't heard it all.
Buckle in for a full, manic rundown of Mario's truly chaotic career...
2006: The hell-raising begins at Serie C side Lumezanne, where a teenage Mario specialises in a particularly unsavoury prank:
"He would pee on our bags containing our clean clothes" recalled teammate Marco Pedretti.
"And he would pee on people too."
2007: Mario signs for Inter Milan, where he's managed by Jose Mourinho.
For a European tie, Balotelli is Inter's only fit striker. But he gets a first half booking, and Jose spends half time begging him to avoid a red.
“Minute 46 – red card.”
Jose brands Mario "unmanageable."
2009: Despite winning 3 league titles and the Champions League, Mario falls foul of the Inter fans.
It doesn't help that he supports their hated rivals AC Milan.
He even pulls on their shirt in a TV interview...
2010: The Italian striker signs for nouveau riche Man City.
After moving into his new house in Manchester, Mario's mum sends him to John Lewis to buy an ironing board.
He comes back with a quad bike, a trampoline, and a Scalextric set.
Two weeks later, the striker totals his Audi R8 on the way into training.
Police arrive and search Mario, finding £5,000 in his back pocket.
When they quiz him on why he's got so much cash, he replies: "Because I am rich."
It's a good job he is... Mario is soon hit with a £100k fine from Man City.
He's been caught lobbing darts at youth team players from a first floor window at the club's training ground.
Asked to explain himself, Balotelli answers simply: "I was bored".
2011: During a pre-season tour to the US, Mario tries an audacious back-heeled finish.
He fluffs it.
Manager Roberto Mancini is fuming, and immediately substitutes the striker.
Two months later, Balotelli's Cheshire mansion catches fire hours before Man City's table-topping clash with Man United.
Mario and his mates had set off fireworks in the bathroom.
Tiles and plaster are blown off the walls, causing £400,000 of damage.
The next day, Mario scores twice in a 6-1 win and reveals this iconic shirt.
2012: After winning £25,000 in a casino, Mario walks straight outside and gives a grand in cash to a homeless man.
On another occasion, he drives around Manchester dressed as Santa Claus, handing out cash to Christmas shoppers.
But alongside his generosity, Mario still has a penchant for mischief...
On a night out, he runs into Jen Thompson, the prostitute at the heart of Wayne Rooney's cheating scandal.
After spotting her in a restaurant, Mario serenades her with chants of "Rooney, Rooney, Rooney".
The 2012 season ends in glory, as Man City become champions for the first time since 1968.
Balotelli makes the only assist of his Premier League career, teeing up Aguero for his dramatic last minute winner.
2013: After three chaotic years, Mario leaves Man City, and begins a nomadic tour of European clubs.
But he remains an absolute nutter.
After a move to Turkey in 2021, Balotelli is filmed punching his Adama Demispor teammate in frustration at being subbed off.
But his stint in Turkey does offer the chance for some sweet revenge.
Back in 2013, Besiktas manager Sergen Yalcin said Balotelli had "no brain".
Eight years later, Mario scores twice in a 3-3 draw, before sprinting over to Yalcin to taunt him.
As a wild career winds down, Mario now finds himself at Swiss side Sion.
Will the drama end there? Probably not...
We can't promise nutcase Man City strikers pelting 14-year-olds with darts, but if Erling Haaland follows Mario's lead, you'll read about it in our free weekly email.
It's a 3 minute rundown of the funniest stories in sport.
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