C.S. Lewis was an atheist for 30 years
Finally, one conversation with J.R.R. Tolkien changed his mind
So what did Tolkien say?
Here’s what they discussed, and how it led to the conversion of the 20th century’s greatest theologian… 🧵
Lewis was a member of the “Lost Generation”
He served in, and was traumatized by, World War I
The horrors of war — along with modernist philosophy — made him an atheist
It was no simple-minded atheism either. Lewis was a genius…
Lewis graduated top of his class in Oxford
He was studied in philosophy, literature, language, science, and religion:
He didn’t just believe in atheism, he could outsmart any man of his day
However, Lewis was plagued by one thing that defied all rationality…
The one thing Lewis couldn’t explain:
Heartache. He was unhappy
This wasn’t just your regular sadness either
It was desire — a profound longing for something he couldn’t have… but he didn’t know what exactly
His entire life, Lewis was plagued by “stabbings of joy,” and a following sadness
He asked — What is this longing inside of me? Am I doomed to unhappiness?
The questions plagued him for years
For all of his studies, nothing could explain his misery
He confided this confusion in his good friend JRR Tolkien
Tolkien — a practicing Catholic — had a simple answer for him:
Your heart is longing for God!
Lewis resisted this idea, but was open minded. His heart couldn’t stop wailing…
One day, Lewis, Tolkien, and mutual friend Hugo Dyson took a stroll around Oxford
It was meant to be a casual talk, but turned into intense discussion that lasted all night
What were they discussing?
Christianity, and oddly enough… mythology
Why mythology?
Because Lewis loved it. He said the truths of myth helped his heartache
He even appreciated Christianity as a myth:
“If I read a Pagan myth of God sacrificing himself to himself… I liked it very much and was mysteriously moved by it”
Tolkien and Dyson jumped on this point
They stressed Christianity was indeed a myth, but a true myth:
It actually happened
This revelation began haunting Lewis...
A month later, Lewis wrote:
“What Dyson and Tolkien showed me was… the story of Christ is simply a true myth: a myth working on us in the same way as the others, but it really happened”
Within a few weeks, he came to a jarring realization
All his studies, Lewis realized, pointed to ONE truth:
“the books in which we thought beauty was located will betray us if we trust them; it was not in them, it only came through them”
Myths couldn’t heal his heart because they weren’t truth — but they were pointing to truth
Lewis’ heartache was cured
The “true myth,” of Christianity brought him peace, and his old worldview collapsed:
“If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world"
Why was this a miracle?
Lewis didn’t just convert, he found the answer to joy:
The “true myth,” was the answer to his aching heart and curious mind
In other words, this isn’t just a story about Lewis’ conversion
It’s a story that teaches you what true faith actually looks like…
Faith without reason is blind
Faith without love is cold and cruel
Faith, however, grounded in a love for truth is the key to flourishing
Joy, in other words, is having faith that the truth will set you free
The joyous life is not blind faith, nor pure rationality — it’s an impassioned heart and a curious mind
To love the truth with all your heart is to begin a true walk of faith
Only the truth can set you free, and if you follow Lewis’ example, you too may be “surprised by joy”
If you want to learn the great books, join us at the Athenaeum Book Club here!
We’re diving back into The Iliad on Tuesday, August 5th at 12 PM EDT — hope to see you there.
athenaeumbooks.com
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