I have been quiet long enough.
This is perhaps the most important thread on X ever published.
And the most powerful and impactful comic book you will ever read.
If you want to understand Ryan Cohen, GameStop, Bay, and half cash, half stock, bookmark this.
1/24🧵
2/24
In the beginning, there was a small mall video game store.
It was dying.
It had massive short interest.
And a Reddit forum had had ENOUGH.
(You know where this is going.)
3/24
January 2021.
A man in a cat shirt named Roaring Kitty showed up.
The stock went $4 → $483 in weeks.
Hedge fund managers cried into their Bloomberg terminals.
12,000% on memes. The greatest financial event of the millennial era.
4/24
And then HE arrived.
Co-founded Chewy. Sold dog food for $3.35B. Now coming for the dying mall store.
The crowd chanted "PAPA COHEN."
Hodlster, holding a sign at $483: "I AM ALL IN."
(He was not, in fact, fine.)
5/24
For four years the strategy was unclear.
Crypto. NFTs. Then no NFTs. Then collectibles. Then crypto again.
The stock went up anyway.
Hodlster: "I don't need fundamentals I have FAITH."
6/24
By 2026, GameStop had $9.4 BILLION in cash.
And exactly zero idea what to do with it.
Cohen sat on top of the vault reading Sun Tzu.
This is foreshadowing.
7/24
Then he had The Idea.
GameStop + eBay = Amazon Killer.
(allegedly.)
Hodlster: "sir... that's just two dying companies hugging."
8/24
He wrote it on hotel stationery.
"Dear eBay, we will buy you for $55.5 billion. Half cash. Half stock. Other details on our website. Sincerely."
He licked the envelope.
Unsolicited. Non-binding. Confident-ish.
9/24
Then the math hit.
Cash: $9.4B
TD "Maybe Letter": $20B
GameStop stock: $11.9B
= $41.3B
eBay offer: $55.5B
GAP: -$14.2B (oops)
Footnote: "we will figure it out."
10/24
Monday morning. Squawk Box.
Andrew of Squawk: "Walk me through how you fund the deal."
Cohen, deadpan: "Half cash. Half stock."
Andrew: blinks
This goes on for SIXTEEN MINUTES.
11/24
Andrew: "Yes but specifically — there is a gap of about SIXTEEN BILLION dollars."
Cohen: "Yeah. Which part exactly?"
Studio: HA HA HA HA HA
Hodlster watching at home: "is this real?"
(it was real.)
12/24
HALF CASH.
HALF STOCK.
HALF CASH.
HALF STOCK.
HALF CASH.
HALF STOCK.
Andrew: "Sir. Please."
Cohen, sunglasses on, arms crossed, infinite patience.
A masterclass in not answering the question.
13/24
And then he leaned back.
Arms behind his head.
Smile of pure unbothered chaos.
"Yeah. We'll see what happens."
That was the moment the market realized.
He's actually doing this.
14/24
Meanwhile in San Jose.
eBay's board, surrounded by Beanie Babies and PEZ dispensers, panicking.
CFO: "They want to buy us... WITH VIBES?!"
eBay was not consulted. eBay was perplexed.
15/24
PLOT TWIST.
GameStop already owned 5% of eBay.
They forgot to mention it earlier.
Hodlster: "WAIT WHAT."
Quietly building. The Meme King has chips.
16/24
This is the famous "Highly Confident Letter" from TD Securities.
It's a yellow Post-it note.
It says: "we feel pretty good about it — the boys @ TD"
NOTE: highly confident is NOT the same as committed. Or signed. Or real.
17/24
Cut to Amazon HQ.
Jeff is on a beach.
Cocktail in hand.
Watching this all unfold on a tablet.
Laughing.
The actual Amazon Killer was at Cabo. Unworried.
18/24
Hodlster mortgaged his hamster wheel.
Put it up as collateral.
"GAMESTOP IS BUYING AMAZON. WAIT. EBAY. SAME THING. ALL IN."
The retail army mobilized.
19/24
The apes united.
Pitchforks made of diamond-hand emojis.
Banner: "EBAY OR DIE."
Hodlster front and center: "IF WE BUY ENOUGH GME CALLS THE DEAL FUNDS ITSELF."
(memetic finance: 0/1 attempts so far)
20/24
The prediction markets weighed in.
Kalshi: "GameStop completes eBay acquisition by 2026"
YES: 26%
NO: 74%
Volume: $2,143
The market gave it a 1-in-4 shot.
The market is funded by people who can't smell vibes.
21/24
WHAT WE LEARNED TODAY:
The Meme King has chips. He will play them.
Do not interrupt a CEO mid-mantra.
Half cash + half stock + half vibes = 1.5x belief.
The math doesn't have to work for the meme to work.
Highly Confident is a vibe, not a contract.
22/24
Letter from Hodlster:
"Dear Mr. Cohen,
I sold my hamster wheel for GME calls. Please complete the deal by Friday.
Yours in diamond hands,
Hodlster
P.S. Tell Andrew of Squawk I said hi."
23/24
COMING NEXT:
The Roaring Kitty Returns.
Plus: will TD Securities answer the phone?
Sunset over the GameStop+eBay merged castle.
The Amazon truck, still unbothered, in the distance.
24/24
CHARACTER STATS:
Cohen — Speed: Calm. Strength: Vibes. Special Move: Half Cash Half Stock.
Hodlster — Speed: Robinhood Latency. Special Move: Mortgage The Wheel.
Andrew of Squawk — Special Move: That Doesn't Add Up.
Read more: leadlagreport.com
Bonus: my team and I make these comics for KIDS too.
Your kid's actual face. Their stuffie as sidekick. A 24-page hardcover where they save the day.
No half-cash. No half-stock. Just half the price of therapy 😂
Mother's Day cutoff Thursday → capetales.com
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