Okay, hear me out...

In 2016, the ultra-greedy, short-sighted Trump only cared about one thing:

Sucking up to Russia to pave the way for the Trump Moscow Hotel and a $300+ mil. payday.

He didn’t care about the presidency. He actually wanted to lose.

1/
Trump, in his narcissistic, simplistic thinking, thought he was just laying the groundwork to capitalize on losing.

So, when Russia came along and said “Let’s work together....” Trump was happy to agree because he thought it was just buddying up to Putin.

2/
So when Russia offered dirt on Hillary, Trump happily says “thanks, you’re such a great partner...”.

...and then Russia says “How about changing your platform on the Ukraine?”

...and Trump says “Happy to, my friends!” thinking he’ll never be in office to folllw-through.

3/
So Trump was just taking the quids and promising the quos as a courtship of sorts.

He thought he was being smart.

Posturing like he’d bend over backwards for Russia without actually having to do anything... since he’d lose and not have to deliver.

4/
In Trump’s lizard brain, he’d think that was brilliant. His fantasy:

“I told them I’d do anything for them. I’d lift sanctions. I’d break up NATO. Whatever they wanted. I didn’t have to do any of it... but they were so happy, they gave me a big hotel deal. I’m a genius.”

5/
...but then he won. Russia delivered on their end of the bargain.

Then Trump was trapped.

No hotel. No $300 million. None of the goodies he wanted... and Russian partners who could put him and put him in prison if he didn’t pay up on his end of the deal.

6/
I dunno, I think this is all quite plausible.

Trump thought he was being a super slick grifter. Blowing smoke up the asses of his Russian friends. Setting them up to close the deal he wanted.

Then he ended up upside down with Putin calling to collect.

7/
Trump was working on his big Moscow deal right up to close to the election.

His plan was to win by losing... and then he lost by winning.

Now it’s all coming out and he’s sunk.

He’s just dumb enough for this crazy theory to be true. We’ll see.

8/8

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More from @TheRealHoarse

Feb 18
So, I stop at my local outdoor store to buy longjohns and wool socks for Curlapalooza this weekend.

Get to talking with the cashier who happens to know a great deal about the physics of curling.

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(note to self: Google ‘rotational equilibrium’)
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The Hatfields and McCoys of physics.

I have no idea what I’m even talking about here. I was an English major.

I could give you some decent free verse on the metaphor of the curling stone. I wasn’t told about the math tho.
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There is a house I pass by on occasion.

It is a sore thumb. A little stone chalet with a Swiss-ish turret clock behind a curved stone wall.

It has always struck me as an authentic place leftover from a different time.

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It is on a busy road and is a block away from a major highway.

It just always felt like an authentic leftover to me though.

So, I looked it up.

100 years ago, it was the gatehouse for a sprawling estate incomprehensibly vast by today’s standards.

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A mile or more up that dirt road was *one of the homes* of the oil baron, Louis Hyde.

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My son and I do a thing where we scout “Best of…” food lists for new places, pick one, and make an outing of it. Barbecue, Latino food, ice cream shops, breakfast places.

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These outings feel like little trips. Mini-adventures.

This morning, we did a breakfast run. Half-hour drive. Half-hour wait.

Sweet. Fancy. Moses.

Worth it. Delicious.

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Glazed pork belly bites on a stick.

Nacho omelette cups.

Pork roll, egg, and cheese egg rolls with cranberry ketchup.

Basically, three small dishes we shared.

So fun, these little roadies.

//
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Feb 12
Sitting with my son at an empty restaurant counter, the two of us drifting in and out of conversation as we tend to do.

An older woman walks up to me and says “Excuse me. Is this your son? I just wanted to say, you seem very comfortable with each other. It’s nice to see.”

1/
Let me tell you, that is among the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.

It is one thing to feel like you have a close, comfortable relationship with your child. It is another to have someone else tell you they can tell.

It was so out of the blue. And it made my day.

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And this wasn’t today. It was months ago.

I still think of it often.

I think it was that she saw us in the most regular of moments. We were there eating a casual bite, drifting in and out of being present, talking and then not, quiet and then talking some more.

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Feb 10
People who act like this are shitheads.

I can't even begin to tell you how many times some self-absorbed asshole has gone off on me like this while having no idea that my problems absolutely dwarfed their little drama they mistook for a crisis.

I hate people who do this. Image
For real, no joke, when my entire life was burning down, some person would just go off and then be like “I’m sorry. I’m just dealing with a lot right now.”

and it was never close to “a lot”.

It was always only *one* of the checkboxes on my list.
Always wanted to say:

“Ya ain’t the first to get divorced. Ya ain’t the first to have someone die. Ya ain’t the first to have crushing debt or lose your house or job. Ya ain’t even the first to have all of them at once. Your shit ain’t new, different or bigger.”
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Feb 9
I have learned a lot about people and social dynamics from my experiences on Twitter.

One of the little insights: There are people on here who think reading someone’s tweets is like knowing them really well in real-life.

1/
That population on here tends to dramatically over-read and over-value minor things - both good and bad - as if they are hugely telling about a person…

and those people often change their whole opinion about someone based on those incidental little things.

2/
The irony is that the people in that group seem to think of themselves as really discriminating judges of character - as if they are far better at judging others than most - when, in fact, they tend to be much worse.

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