Thread by @johnpavlovitz

Why Authenticity Matters

Five years ago I was reeling from the sudden death of my father, when I was called into a meeting and told by my pastor that I was being "released" after only 5 months at this new church.

My outspokenness on matters of sexuality and race and nationalism had proven to be a liability. Even though I knew it was coming and knew I was probably speaking and writing myself out of a job, it was still devastating. So much loss in so little time.

I was without my father, without a job, and without any community here in a new city with my wife and two young children—and feeling like calling it a day. I decided rather than move or give up, to just keep doing what I was doing: loving people and speaking honestly.

When I did, I found that I had received a gift: I could now ask anything and say everything.

One morning I wrote a blog post called "If I Have Gay Children." 1100 words from the deepest place in my heart about something that mattered to me.

johnpavlovitz.com/2015/06/25/if-…

The piece was an effort to humanize an issue so many Christians seemed unable or unwilling to. I wanted people to understand how damaging their theology was to flesh and blood human beings who were someone's children—maybe their own.

I published the post and within hours it reached millions of people, and several million more the following day. CNN called. The local news called. The Huffington Post called. Publishers called.

I ended up being asked to write a book, which eventually became 'A Bigger Table." Since then I've published three books, written nearly 1,000 blog posts, and traveled to 50 cities around the country.

I've been able to connect with millions of lives all across the world, and found a voice I didn't realize I had, all because I was finally speaking from the most authentic place.

Five short years ago I was in complete free fall—and what transformed everything was me telling my truest truth, even if in the moment it seemed like nothing. Those words did a work nothing else could do.

The day after publishing that post while appearing on CNN, beneath me on the screen it said, "John Pavlovitz, Pastor." I often joke that it could have also said, "Unemployed and currently despondent."

I had no job, no money, no megachurch, no marketing team, no media empires—just 1100 words that I had to get out.

It sounds trite to say "share your story and use your voice," but it's actually that simple. You've lived in your story so long you don't realize how powerful it is. And you've heard your voice so long it sounds like white noise to you—but to others its a song they need to hear.

My life is no more extraordinary than yours, no more worthy of notice, no more filled with possibility. I just said the stuff I felt needed to be said and would die if I didn't say. That's all any of us can do: offer what we have and hope it helps—and it always does.

If you're in the valley of grief or the pain of failure or the devastation of loss right now, realize that even now you are being given gifts you could never get any other way. Just breathe and keep going, and when you're ready to speak and to move—do so.

You have a story and a voice that no one in the history of the planet has had or ever will have. That's more than enough.

Find the thing in you that you need to say and say it—fear, sadness, and job be damned.

Be greatly encouraged, friends.