After a few concerning days of murderous rampage, he discovered he could tame cats. Cue spawning a million cats and setting up a crazy cat lady (gentleman?) house.
Hmmm...
...this is probably fine. 😬😅
@GhostHause has taught him well.
#MinecraftMonday #Minecraft
Me: Oh yeah? How were you being a pirate?
5yo: I was breaking into people's homes and stealing their treasure!
Me: That sounds more like you were being a burglar than a pirate...
5yo: Pirates like treasure!
#Minecraft #MinecraftMonday
Don't worry though folks -it's safe!
He put carpet on the diving board so "people won't slip and bump their heads"! 🤣
It's set to not fight back -but it's still exciting! 😄
#Minecraft
5yo was quiet, so I thought he was as awe struck as I was. 🤩 Then, when I'm mid sentence, on the verge of tears, he cheerfully exclaims to 2yo "Did you see me kill the dragon?!"
@Minecraft @Mojang
#Minecraft
#Minecraft problems.
5yo: It’s to protect my kitties from bad guys coming in the house.
Me: Oh yeah? How does it work?
5yo: This is a book that they have to sign before they can come in and if they put a *burglar name*, this TNT will blow them up.
😮🤣
(Says the kid that's playing #Minecraft on creative mode) 🤣
Me: That's a lot pal. Why are you killing them?
5yo: I need blaze rods!
Me: Why?
5yo: Because I need blaze power!
Me: Why?
5yo: For SCIENCE! 🤩
#Minecraft
He tells me he's not killing *everyone*, so they can come to his shop. 🤨😅
Me: Who's in your bed?
5yo: THAT SKELETON!! 😡
#minecraft @Minecraft
Now he's melting down because "IT'S TOO HARD TO GET IN MY HOUSE!!!" 😡😡😡
🙄
5yo (barely audible over deafening squeaks, wheeks and meows): They're doing NOTHING! 😩
#Minecraft
💥multiple explosion sounds💥
I kept telling 5yo to make a house before nightfall, but he decided making sticks and finding pumpkin seeds were the absolute priority (no idea why)
Once he took over again, he almost immediately fell into a deep chasm. I estimated digging our way out through solid rock with nothing but sticks was going to take at least 10mins.
He says it's a "Nerf Gun House".
Me: That's not very nice, buddy. 🤨
5yo: It was nice for me! 😃
#Minecraft
Me: Oh yeah? 😃 It's so nice not having to fight you for once! You're really growing u-
5yo: It's morning!
Me: Oh... You meant in #Minecraft 😑
5yo: Yes.
Me: Oh, this I HAVE to see! 😃
Guys -it's as amazing as it is terrifying! 🤣
He's set up a little minecart toy for him to play with. The nearby animals keep climbing in and taking rides!
#Minecraft
Me: Uhhh...
5yo: I fed them potatoes and they got naked and then there was a baby!
Me: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
#Minecraft 🤨
Now he's trapped 2 villagers in a pen and is lobbing potatoes at them, hoping to make a baby.
I told him to add beds (as per the wiki) so now he's shouting at them to go to sleep in their beds! 🤣
He's filled the dispenser with potatoes so they can help themselves, like goddamn hamsters! 🤣
#Minecraft
He's sealed actual creepers inside, so I guess it's kind of a creeper piñata?
Taking bets on how long this powder keg it will last 😆
#Minecraft
-RIP King Creeper
2/2/2020 - 2/2/2020
He's currently finding new and exciting ways to kill himself.
This is probably fine...? 😬
I'll attempt to continue it here. He came downstairs decked out in his "Minecraft Costume", so I of course had to take a pic!
I suggested he calls himself the Bread Pirate Roberts.
-Feeling pretty proud of myself for that one. 😏
Here's the translation:
"100yrs ago there was a doctor and he made a machine and MOBs came in and went in the machine. Lava turned green and the block monster turned the world of #Minecraft into a pumpkin."
Me: That's nice! 😊 Who?
5yo: The zombie! I gave him a villager, so he could eat his brain! 😃
Me: Oh. Cooool...? 🤨
#Minecraft
Me: Oh yeah? What will they do?
5yo: They won't do anything else except play Minecraft!
I'm not sure 5yo is doing it right. He's gone all #DOOM on the International Space Station.
Still don't think he's using these educational #Minecraft packs right... 🤨
This is a robot with muscles. It has the Neon City logo above it and is holding a glass of water, because "that's funny!"
I asked if it was on the loo and appauled, 5yo said it's an office chair.
He found a guide to make a "plushie" of him in #Minecraft, then went the extra mile and turned it into a POP Vinyl.
He rounded out his collection with some Minifig villagers. Sliiiiiighty creepy with them being alive 😱
@GhostHause: Do you know, when I woke up this morning I thought to myself, “I do hope MORE of my family start talking to me about Dan TDM”
🤣
... And that's how 5yo ended up learning about thatched roofs! 🤣
Me: You're going to make a brutal DM one day pal.
#Minecraft
6yo (not even looking up): Nope.