Thread by @DrSandman11

What’s this Tiger King thing about [presses play]

Ok this sounds insane

Seems like owning tigers... bad idea

Now there’s a giant snake

Why does anyone have a cabinet full of poisonous snakes

Of course his name is Joe Exotic

And he’s somehow embarrassed of his mullet

187 tigers?? That seems expensive

Oh, no... some are lions

I have that same sparkly shirt 🤔

Oklahoma seems in need of dentistry

That mustache would probably be appropriate for an N95 mask

Bill O’Reilly from the “fuck it, we’ll do it live!” days!

Oooh a crazy nemesis

Crazy how the tigers want to tear peoples faces off

“Isn’t it horrible how big cats are in cages? But *we* have to put them in cages so they are safe until they die”

This is like [crazy cat people]^3

Lol and she’s allergic

Is this considered good country music? Can’t tell

People need to spend less on tattoos and more on teeth

They haven’t explained the six-gun yet

SECOND NEMESIS

“More sophisticated, much smarter... he’s fearless”

Same barber tho

Seems like a bad idea letting the cheetahs near the people like that, for insurance purposes

I call John Travolta playing this guy in the movie

$655??

Now he’s up to 227 tigers? +40 tigers in the last 10 minutes

Seems like keeping the tigers on the hungry side... ticking time bomb? sword of Damocles? seems like something bad

Nemesis trying to sabotage Joe taking tigers to the mall!

Oh it’s Tinder’s fault

Tbh Shaq prob needs a tiger cat, for proportions

Is this Spinal Tap

Wait he actually seems like the sane one

This is the best infographic ever created

“Small Waco” is a thing sane people say

Standing outside with a tornado is a thing sane people do

Putting your own name on a bullet is a thing sane

PETA might need more guns tho

Oh the gun is for PETA

Tiger weddings?

Tiger feud!

Doc’s soul patch game is 💯

Putting poisonous snakes on someone’s mailbox is a thing that

Dude likes to shoot lakes

How are there 6 whole-ass more episodes??

Episode 2:

They filmed her arm getting torn off??

Damn... “the media wins” if she doesn’t go back to work with tigers?

Oh hai @ChrisCuomo

“Just another day” working with tigers

I feel like “zip line accident not tiger accident” was pertinent information they could have mentioned earlier

Doc really likes that elephant

“It has a primordial calligraphy that tells a message just in its very image” is a thing a person said

Tigers are a flat circle

Is someone custom making these shirts for him? Off the rack?

I saw a squirrel once in NJ

(And a shitload of deer)

Ooh third nemesis

This guy seems like a Bond villain

Oh he inspired “Scarface”

“Oh the guys that worked for me murdered an ATF informant and dumped him on my farm and cut him up with a circular saw and burned him”

Going from Great Dane to cougar seems like a jump

I want a house monkey

“Doctor of Mystical Science”... @RandPaul?

Ohh it’s a sex cult

“Normal one”... withdrawn

“Apprentices”

Doc junior has done some shiiiiit

Tattoo:teeth ratio is instructive for clinicians

He wore the gun to the triple wedding??

Lackluster cake tbh

Travis seems a little Stockholm syndromey

So there’s more than one tiger sex cult 🧐 #murica

Dude is reeeaaalllllly trusting of that giant crocodile

“Not paying employees” is a good business model tbh

Damn, all 3 nemeses are like cult leaders... is this a South thing? I don’t recall any tiger sex cults in the northeast (tbh wasn’t really looking tho)

Oh god why is there no dentistry ever

Dropping grenades out of helicopters is a

A liger!

Who is making these costumes

At least Doc knows it’s a cult

CULT OFF

Smoking while pouring gasoline is a thing that

Ooh inherited millions from missing husband supposedly buried on her property??

Episode 3: “must keep watching”

Seems like if you had a bunch of tigers, getting rid of a body would be pretty easy

The editing on this show is so far excellent... the crazy is starting to spiral

Dermatologists would also do well

All documentaries featuring police detectives need a slow-mo “walking toward the camera in sunglasses” shot or it doesn’t count

What’s with all the May-December weddings

Holding a gun on someone is a good way to romance

“Angel sent straight from hell” seems prophetic

Oh the old “multi millionaire goes missing and wife 22 years his junior gets his money and feeds him to the tigers” story

That lawyer has a great tie

Yikes

Well I guess it makes sense there’s some dark backstory

“Underground exotic animal auction” seems like a hard thing to organize before the internet

So, I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days

Dude didn’t shave the beard after being rejected from ZZ Top

Arguing about exotic animal breeding in Costa Rica is a normal thing that people

What? The dude that left his family for a younger woman also left that woman for a subsequently younger woman??

“Sexoholic” will probably be in the DSM-VI

Joe seems fairly glib about tiger murder

Good tie lawyer dude is hot about Don’s poorly spelled restraining order

Finally someone with good teeth

Yeah but I bet they didn’t check the tiger poop

Florida gonna Florida

Don’s “American tourist in Costa Rica” game is 💯

“No missing airplane” seems like a clue

“Having several small plane crashes and surviving” seems like a reason to stop flying small planes

Haven’t seen many tigers this episode tbh

I feel like good tie lawyer is a hobbit

Lol country tiger murder song “Here Kitty Kitty” is NUTS

Tiger stomachs Breaking Bad
chemical drums
🤜🤛
Corpse disposal

Cop brother coverup?

Just buying milk byproducts at 3am for tigers, as one does

Seems like a flimsy POA, but I’m no lawyer

Have the police seen this documentary? Seems like she did it so far

Hey that guy killed 37 people a week?? Oh they don’t have the bodies so it doesn’t count

Joe Exotic is making a lot of sense is a thing I wasn’t expecting to type

Oh she’s a hippie “get rich quick” advisor too

“Reasonably rational” is NOT Carole, or you dude

Hey police detective dude, seems like a *lot* of circumstantial evidence tho

Episode 4: Joe Sings His Catalog

Wait he has actual poop there

Where’d Doc go

Oh there he is

If your crazy documentary doesn’t involve Florida you’re not doing it right

He’s pretty committed to that mullet

Rick doesn’t stop smoking much huh

“The boa isn’t constricting enough”

“Just roll around in it”

“Anyone see where that bullet came down?”

I AM THE TIGER KING

Seems like Joe needs a refresher on firearm safety

“Rabbit picture” seems ominous

“Do I *really* have to explain the picture of people smiling holding dead rabbits?? Jeez!”

Blowing up your own watch is a thing that sane people do

Now where’s he gonna sleep?

Crashing halt??

Damn! They blew up his tv studio/alligator keep

Towering inferno of nothing but flames AND fire

What are the leg strings for

Ooh she tried to turn Rick

Rick’s retirement plan was suspect

Maybe he shouldn’t have let them film the shady shit if

Maybe don’t film criming with lawyers (see Bad, Breaking)

Just playing with a snake while being interviewed, as one does

Why didn’t he just shoot the ribbon

1) compromising video tapes
2) hard drives under subpoena
3) 🔥🔥🔥

John’s lost a few teeth since then

Sold for love and affection 💞

His mom??

Howard seems like such a normal, reasonable dude... despite

Poor Mom Exotic

Tbf coulda got more GoFundMe money with “Exotic” instead of “Shreibvogelzyfsa”

Smol tiger 😢

Looks like a tiger feeding frenzy

At least Carole didn’t take his throne!

Is that Mike from Breaking Bad?

He drives a humvee and walks in slo-mo, so he’s def a badass

What is it with people and having mountain lions in their houses

“Picture with baby tiger”... “sex time”

Rule 34 I guess

Was wondering what happened to Travis

Of course they keep filming

Jeff has some unresolved anger issues

Doc has altered his facial hair

Jeff turned out to be untrustworthy??

He stole Joe’s zoo??

Shocker I tells ya

Episode 5: Chimps Love Minions

Boxing a chimp seems kinda fun not gonna lie

This is like Game of Tiger Thrones if everyone was on meth

Allen has seen some shit

James seems like he knows where allll the bodies are

Mmmm leftover Walmart meat pizza... well we all can’t live in NJ 🍕

Who can forget the Exotic-Clinton-Trump debate

I actually remember this @iamjohnoliver episode

TIGER PARTY 🇺🇸

Travis could totally take ISIS

Yeah but you did it for a year and a half tho

Maldonado? I thought his name was Shreibvogelfluff

Lol his campaign manager was *of course* the Walmart ammo counter manager... perfect skill set

He thought he was going to win!

Where does one even buy political condoms

What a wild interview! Dude almost got eaten

Yeah who wouldn’t think this guy should own a “fucking tiger”

Is that the covid map

Just bringing a tiger and chimp to Congress as one does

At least Carole knows she’s been checkmated by cuteness

How embarrassing they all wore the same hat

He’d reach more people if the campaign invested in a t-shirt cannon

Don’t mess with Allen, he’s got one of those eye tats

He made 112 other video messages?

Little help?

Yelling at tigers... works?

Pink camouflage for which natural environment?

Travis is a business hippie

Amazing more people didn’t get shot a lot

Meth and skydiving seems like

Travis seems like a STD risk

Get that truck Travis!

Travis’ teeth are pretty good for meth

But he had that whole bag of pot

😱

Awww poor Travis

Prob didn’t need the priest collar tho

Gotta say that eulogy... 💯

Yeah you probably would think that’s odd

Didn’t fix the bathroom?

Still running for governor?

Now why would they think that’s crazy

To the humvee!

Party bus with animals seems like a high insurance premium

Ohh now I understand the 🔒 reference #shudder

Dillon has NO idea what the fuck he’s in for

Yeah just stick your fingers in there it’ll be fine trust me

Yeah why even think about that??

Kinda messed up she even went tho

Tigers notoriously hate hats

Yeah maybe he needs a transition team plan 🧐

Narrator: stranger things did indeed happen

Powell, Lawhorn and Exotic, attorneys at law

“Couple death threats” as sign of a successful campaign

Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you

*Now* it’s gotten dark!

Episode 6: Everyone Murdered Their Previous Spouse Apparently

Psshht can’t keep tigers in hotel rooms? I thought this was America man

More filming while criming!

Gonna say Joe has too many hats

Campaign finance laws shmampaign shminance shlaws

Still filming the criming

Ketamine?

Tbf Jeff seems like a scary mother

Did he film the farewell song before loading the animals or after

Oh he got a Dillon neck tat!

That’s a *lot* of cows

Doc and Carole biding their time? And what happened to Scarface

He did a proper elbow cough! Prophetic

Bran wins the Game of

“On the run” with a shitload of tigers, as one does

Seems like finding someone with a shitload of tigers shouldn’t be that hard

Ooh hidden button cam

The Royal Palm Hotel always has vacancy

I’m literally about to give you “hearsay”

Do I believe the guy who said 100 times he wanted to kill her actually wanted to kill her? No I do not sir

Marc ain’t no Mike Ehrmantraut

People seem very unconcerned about discussing major felonies they’ve been party to

Jeff seemed fine with the murder planning and then confessing to such

Camouflage suit: normal for Florida

Crossbow: OVER THE LINE

What are you wearing Carole

Jeff backstabbing with Carole...

Who hasn’t gotten in trouble with a lemur. Fucking government man.

You just blew John’s mind man

Ohh illegal credit cards and grand theft auto... makes more sense than lemur fraud

Lol “walking Chucky doll” because accurate

Now his last name is Passage?

Allen is scary af

Ketamine is NOT a paralyzing agent

Allen is tired of this shit

Body disposal? Thought we established tiger stomachs

No illegal activity mister

Seems reasonable for a criminal to flip on another criminal, not “madness” zip line dude

Hiring a $3000 crackhead killer?? Who’d believe that

Dillon seems fine with all of this

He can tell by the color of the water?

Exotic down!

This video of Carole’s is lit like an evil address to the UN Security Council threatening world destruction

How dare this jail treat me like I’m in jail!

It’ll be... paradise

At least Allen was smart enough to pick the right side

Episode 7: The Epic Conclusion

Everyone says that about monkeys

Dillon seems like the only genuinely good person so far

Hey he said he wouldn’t kill tigers!

Doc is on Joe’s side now?

Yeah I mean I shot the tigers

James needs a sleep test #OSA

None of these people seem “the nicest”

Hahaha just kidding ok I’ll confess on camera

I bet these guys did really badly in crime school

If the pants also have clowns on them,

“I’m a Libertarian, so technically ‘fuck the Feds’”

I like to think the courtroom sketch artist really enjoyed doing the tigers

Erik also seems like a good dude

Def spent less time sketching Carole

PSA: don’t smoke in bed

He wasn’t topless in court??

Mr Exotic? How formal

Allen seems to miss the point of bathing

Apparently? You’d think he’d remember something like that

Joe on the stand!

Sketch artist coulda done better tbh

Doc seems to really know the market on hitmen 🧐

Seems like a bad idea to have filmed all those death threats in retrospect huh

Ominous church bells

Chucky got morals all of a sudden?

Whoa 19-0

Prison mullet is somehow better

Oh c’mon Howard

Another May-December marriage

Oh Jesus Jeff

Tbh it’s funny Eye if the Tiger hadn’t played before yet in this

Don’t really get the jet ski

Papers... business papers

Joe ratting to PETA

Just driving and feeding a monkey pizza as one does

Tim!

Howard you gonna be tiger food inside 10 years

“The Adventures of Bonedigger and Cletus” coming this summer on @netflix

Are the dachshunds there for the lion? Like, convenient snacks?

Didn’t quiiiite cover it all up

Won’t someone think of the tigers

“Filming a reality show and misrepresented the subject material” is for sure an unforgivable sin

Doc just got raided last December?? Sequel!

Who doesn’t associate African/Asian tigers with country music tbh

Episode 7... mostly a coda. Still want to know what happened to Carole’s tiger food husband tho

/fin