Thread by @pdmcleod

I'm starting an obnoxious thread on movies I watched during social isolation. First up:

BLOW THE MAN DOWN (2019) - Fargo meets Maine, complete with sea shanties. A matriarchal small-town murder thriller and indie gem. Check it out.

SNEAKERS (1992) - Why does this movie have such a good cast? I mean it's fine. I enjoyed it enough and have a soft spot for 90s movies doing tech. But why are Robert Redford and Sidney Poitier and Dan Aykroyd and River Phoenix and Ben Kingsley and David Strathairn all in this?

COLOR OUT OF SPACE (2019) - Probably the worst way to watch this is to go in thinking/hoping you're about to see another Mandy, which is what I did. It's not Mandy. But it is an HP Lovecraft horror movie staring Nic Cage involving a new alien color that is just purple so why not?

Lot of Sneakers fans on here.

BLOODSPORT (1988) — Add an exclamation point to any criticism of this movie and it becomes high praise. It’s just a big fighting montage! Jean-Claude Van Damme’s acting is unbelievable! What is WITH the soundtrack! Why did he do the splits so many times!

Bloodsport. 5 stars.

I want to note that in an early flashback in Bloodsport there is a kid wearing a New York Giants shirt and a San Francisco Giants hat. Different cities. Different sports. The kid is just crazy for giants.

HIGH AND LOW (1963) — A wealthy businessman’s son is kidnappend. The ransom will bring him to ruin. Then they realize the kidnapper mistakenly took the wrong boy.

Half methodical procedural, half morality thriller that’s so good I can barely stand it. Great movie, great Mifune.

THRONE OF BLOOD (1957) — Every bit as metal as a Kurosawa MacBeth movie ought to be. Makes me want to binge 15 samurai movies and get into archery. Hook this foggy treachery into my veins.

Note: Throne not made of actual blood, is metaphor for murder (most foul)

ZODIAC (2007) — Fincher’s best and it’s cool to see it pushing its way into the great movie canon. But I couldn’t stop thinking how if he made this now it would be a 10-episode show that runs for three season. Some of your coworkers would rave about it. It'd be pretty good.

THE THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR(1999) — I hereby endorse this movie. Two great setpieces bookend it and in the middle the most bonkers vacation sex scene I have ever seen. I had fun the whole time.

Pierce Brosnan would be a legend if he retired to Salinger-esque seclusion after 1999.

TOTAL RECALL (1990) — Is this the best Schwarzenegger movie? You can make a strong case. You get twisty Philip K. Dick high-concept sci-fi, Verhoeven violence, peak 80s makeup effects, and Michael Ironside. It’s enough to make a bead of sweat creep dramatically down your brow.

RAW DEAL (1986) — Is this the best Schwarzenegger movie? No.

PROSPECT (2018) - A masterclass in how to do low-budget sci-fi without it looking cheap. A father, a daughter, and a planet filled with poison spores. It's sustains this beautiful, tense ambiance plus it's got Pedro Pascal. If you dig Moon you need to check this movie out.

THE WILD GOOSE LAKE (2019) - A Chinese crime thriller set in a downtrodden part of Wuhan. Damn this movie looks good. The characters and story twists feel kind of noir by numbers, but still it's so nice to look at.

THE PACKAGE (1989) - Did you know the director of The Fugitive made a movie with Tommy Lee Jones in the hunted role and Gene Hackman hunting him?? Well, it's not as good as it sounds. There's a dense cold-war assassination plot and not near enough Hackman vs Jones time.

THE FUGITIVE (1993) - Had to scratch this itch after watching The Package. Is this the best movie of all time to lazily catch on TV 20 mins in? There's Groundhog Day. I'm partial to O Brother Where Art Thou. But hunting down the one-armed man feels like slipping into a warm bath.

SUDDEN DEATH (1995) - Can Jean-Claude Van Damme protect his idiot children, save the Vice President from terrorists, beat the shit out of the Pittsburgh Penguins mascot and stop the winning goal in game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals? And why won't Powers Both stop shooting people?

THE BARBARIAN INVASIONS (2003) - Turns out maybe don't show this movie about dying to a newbie during these times. Sure you can honestly pitch it as funny and cheeky and ribald and beautiful and life-affirming. But the emotional wallop may cause a breakdown in tears. Or so I hear

SLEUTH (1972) - You could do worse than watching Michael Caine and Laurence Olivier match wits as their rivalry/partnership turns from jovial to ... dun dun dun ... deadly. (Note: most in this list are streamable or rentable but this one I had to buy on DVD)

MORTAL KOMBAT (1995) - This is the best video game movie. The soundtrack, the leaning into fantasy, the Gorro animatronics, the soundtrack, Christopher Lambert, the soundtrack. Technically not a Bloodsport ripoff but a faithful adaptation of a video game that rips off Bloodsport.

MASTER AND COMMANDER (2003) — Great movie! It’s known by its failure to launch a series but who cares, it stands on its own. Best ship-on-ship tension since Wrath of Khan. Landscape shots! High seas action! Paul Bettany! Also feels historically faithful without being super gross.

TOKYO DRIFTER (1966) - Made the mistake of throwing this on while dicking around on my phone at first. Got a bit lost in the plot. The action is nonsensical, topped by a truly goofy bar brawl scene. Still, it looks great and I think I enjoyed it a lot.

GEOSTORM (2017) - Watched this as part of a remote bad movie watching night with friends and even by those standards this movie is awful. Makes Olympus Has Fallen look like Gone With The Wind.