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Ok, so, about this new way to make an amazing cup of coffee — ok, actually a vat of coffee

You’re going to be skeptical so I will give you the whole backstory.

Come along on this coffee journey. You will need: water, coffee, an egg.

/1
I am enjoying this delicious masterpiece as we speak, sitting out in the early morning garden, listening to nice birds try to keep the nasty nest-attacking birds away.

So stick with me as we explore the wonders of Swedish Egg Coffee.

Yes. Egg coffee. /2
“What the hell is egg coffee?!?” you ask.

I get it. That was me.

It’s like this.

My mom was an amazing self-taught home chef. She loved reading cookbooks. There were so many when she died. My sister & I took a lot of them & go thru them when we miss her.

One is this gem: /3
Yes, that’s right, future! It’s the 1969 edition of the Betty Crocker cookbook, with convenient removable binder pages for the menu-planning 1960s domesticant!

You will be seeing more of this marvel. It’s a treasure trove of culture and insanities. I love every page. /4
On Saturday, my niece pulled it out—it has pictures—to look at cakes. After bedtime, we had a cocktail & flipped thru, reading aloud the tips & absurdities for aspiring entertainment queens who had neighbors & bosses to impress w/ molded salads. A whole chapter on sandwiches! /5
There was a chapter on “appetizer beverages” — including “crowd-size beverages” — because of course.

Happy crowds need hot bouillon! /6
And then: EGG COFFEE

“An old-fashioned recipe for up-to-date goodness!”

What? What is happening?

Wouldn’t this be like egg-drop coffee?

How is this enough of a thing to be in the 1969 Betty Crocker cookbook if we coffee sophisticants of the future have never heard of it?! /7
We took to the internet. Turns out this was a thing invented by Swedish-American immigrants en route to this brave new world. It has persisted thru church culture, where vats of coffee are needed. /8
The egg is mixed into the grounds before steeping.

The original intention was to clarify the coffee—pull the grounds out of it. Probably important on ships crossing the stormy Atlantic. Also makes coffee less bitter.

But a side benefit: the egg white extracts more caffeine /8
More caffeine, you say? <<ears perked>>

I suddenly became interested in this historical sideshow.

Now, if you aren’t new here, you know I have one basic coffee rule: no fussy coffee.

Black coffee. Prepares as simply as possible. I go cowboy everyday. /9
This rule is derived from years of working in places where either if there was any coffee at all, it was a miracle — or coffee came one way, and if you fussed about it, you were the ***hole American who had no idea what was going on in this country. /10
If you’ve ever been working near the border of Guinea, say, at a formerly abandoned mine site, with someone who is like “oh do you have milk” and someone walks to a village to get it and then they are “oh is that only whole milk?” and then “maybe can you heat it?” — /11
Or else been in any Arabic/Turkish/Persian country — when the “war was over,” say — having to drink 15 cups of tiny delicious rocket fuel coffee during endless meeting with someone who is like “oh I can’t drink that Turkish coffee” (tip: Arabs don’t call it Turkish) — /12
Or else worked in countries at the edge of Europe that are still really poor, and when you are campaigning in tiny villages, some local guy offers you cups precious expensive instant Nescafé, and the person with you is like “ugh instant coffee, is there a Starbucks?” — /13
— if you have ever lived these mortifications, you become an adherent of unfussy coffee.

Coffee is an offering of welcome & trust. Come share the fire, exchange a story.

Also, you are probably hungover if you are doing this “learn about people” thing right. /14
Just drink the coffee. ☕️☕️

Otherwise it’s an insult.

But back to the egg coffee.

Egg coffee seemed to meet my criteria of unfussiness.

It’s one pot. No special equipment. No funnels or gauges. You boil the crap out of it, it ends up magical. In theory.

Ok. I’m game.

/15
So, let’s start this rodeo

I don’t need **60 servings** of coffee. (Tho 60 1969 servings = approx 25 now servings)

Half will do on a writing day.

So I’ll do a reduced, one-egg version.

First, add 9 cups of water to a pot put it to boil. Covered helps. Anyone can do this. /16
That watched pot won’t boil! So do things.

Second, measure coffee into a bowl. In this instance, I am using a can of emergency coffee from my stockpile, not the Swedish coffee I usually drink, to prove this will work with any coffee — and lo, perhaps make all coffee better /17
Depending on how strong you like your coffee, measure 3/4 cup (regular) to 1 cup (Molly-level) coffee into a bowl.

Now is the weird part. Crack an egg into it, add 1/4 cup or so of water, stir until consistency of potting soil.

Just remember: it is juicing the caffeine out /18
Let it sit while water boils, putter around kitchen, feed cats, etc.

When the water is boiling — huzzah — add in all the coffee goop, slowly, don’t let it boil over onto the stove. Get all that sludge out of bowl! Stir it once or twice — then leave it alone for the duration /19
Soon it will look marvelous and foamy.

Then it will start getting chunky.

The egg causes the grounds to bind together at the top, thus pulling them out of the coffee. Pretty genius!

You will boil 3-5 min if a normal person, or 10 min if you are me. Longer = more caffeine /20
At the end, it’s pretty chunky. The coffee will be clumped together, floating around despondently, spent but satisfied that it has fulfilled its coffee purpose. /21
Remove from heat. Pour a cup or so of cold water over the floating coffee gunk. Why? It makes the gunk sink to the bottom. So, it presses itself. 😮 /22
Cover and let sit for 5-10 min while coffee settles.

This is a good time to take a first morning gander of the garden, marveling at the new seedlings and the giant bee poop artfully dripped on the rose leaves.

Looking good, garden! /23
Upon returning to the kitchen, there is magic. The coffee looks silky — nay, voluptuous.

You can strain it into a cup proclaiming that hybrid warfare is real—but you don’t really need the strainer until almost to the dregs, since the coffee is bound together at bottom /24
You will have a gorgeous cup of coffee. And a traveler for your neighbor in your Idaho mug, if you are nice and seeking egg coffee converts.

Leave the rest on the stove, or pour off into a pot. Whatever. /25
This coffee is delicious reheated. Even in the microwave. Which I abhor — microwaved coffee. Still silky, smooth, not bitter, deep flavor, teeth-rattling caffeine.

Also delicious day-old, chilled. Yes, I have tested this. /26
You can also scale this and make a smaller amount if you are not a caffeine-riddled addict chasing the next high. Mix the goop, use half or whatever in less water, store rest covered in fridge for next use. /27
As the 1969 cookbook professes — this would be a genius way to make coffee for a lot of people without having to fuss around. Porch coffee, transformed. /28
Drink it in the garden, looking out the window, whatever.

This totally weird thing is a treasure.

If you enjoy coffee as well as celebrate its life-giving properties, try this. I swear. You’ll thank me. Or Swedish-Americans. Whatever. /29
PS 95% of the sandwich recipes in the sandwich chapter included hot dogs. It was so weird. We will return to this. /30
PPS it is so much caffeine
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