Thread by @doctorow

Softbank's investments - Uber, Doordash, Wework, etc - are cons. They launder Saudi oil billions with "businesses" that lose titanic amount of money for many years, while also preying on real businesses and their own workforce.

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Then, Softbank exits with an IPO that offloads the money-losing company on suckers who think its longevity means there must be a "path to profitability." Softbank cleans up, but workers' lives and real businesses are destroyed, and the suckers get cleaned out.

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A little microcosm of this is yesterday's viral tale of a pizzeria that found itself on the receiving end of a bungled short-con by Doordash and turned the tables on the company. It's a petty revenge, but so satisfying.

pluralistic.net/2020/05/18/cod…

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After all, when you're up against a bottomless well of Saudi oil-billions, there's precious few ways to score even a petty victory.

Enter coronavirus.

Softbank just posted a $17.7B loss on Wework and Uber.

bloomberg.com/news/articles/…

#Schadenfreude

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If there's one thing Trumpism has taught us about sociopathic con-artists, it's that their greatest boasts mask their deepest terrors. And Softbank is no exception.

Yesterday's Softbank earnings call was HILARIOUS.

bloomberg.com/opinion/articl…

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Softbank presented investors and analysts with a slidedeck that showed their "unicorns" (companies with >$1B valuation, though often that valuation is based entirely on Softbank's bald-faced, con-artist's assertion) tumbling into the "valley of coronavirus."

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Oh no, you might think, those poor unicorns are stuck in a ditch!

But fear not! According to Softbank, those unicorns are merely a larval stage, and they will pivot to becoming pegasi, sprouting wings and flying away!

So.

Much.

Winning.

eof/