Today on @tigerinstemm we’re going to be talking about being an ally to trans colleagues. Our aim is to talk about some options in a way that is accessible to people who may not previously have thought about these issues. This thread will be added to throughout the day.
TIGERS members who are cis (i.e. whose gender identity conforms to their sex assigned at birth) try to be allies to our trans colleagues, who have been incredibly generous in educating us. This thread will explains some things we’ve learnt.
Many trans people change their names when they transition (begin to live according to their gender identity, rather than the sex they were assigned at birth). Some trans people refer to their previous names as “deadnames”. Calling them by these deadnames can be really hurtful.
Similarly, think carefully about the pronouns you use to refer to people. Last year @bmatb and @i_jayas discussed this on @tigerinstemm at some depth, so have a look at their thread here:
One thing allies can do is normalise the practice of stating our pronouns, by including pronouns in things like our email signatures and title slides for talks, lectures etc.
Do this regardless of whether there are 'out' trans or non-binary (NB) colleagues in your workplace. Many trans and NB people may not be ‘out’ at work. Indeed you could easily know a trans or NB person and not realise. Stating your pronouns may help them feel more welcome. .
Another important role for allies is that of the active bystander. If you see a colleague repeatedly referring to a trans person by the wrong gender, using the wrong pronouns or using a deadname, then it’s time to step up to the plate and intervene.
If you can, encourage your institution to adopt clear policies on these issues, promoting trans inclusion. That will help educate people who may simply lack awareness, and will give trans colleagues something concrete to fall back on if people do not follow these policies.
A non-binary (enby) person can identify as both or neither a man/woman and sometimes as one or the other. Many terms exists to describe gender identities outside of the man/woman binary.
Like many trans people, non-binary individuals may use a name different from their given name. Some (but not all) may undergo surgery/hormone therapy to more closely align their bodies with their gender identity.
Furthermore, many (but not all) non-binary individuals use gender-neutral pronouns. Your preferred pronouns are not always an indicator of your gender identity - it is best not to make assumptions!
Get into the habit of using gender-inclusive language: e.g. Say "Hello everyone/honoured guests", instead of "Hello ladies and gentlemen", or "To whom it may concern instead" of "Dear Sir/Madam", use "they" instead of "his/her". Avoid gendered colloquialisms like “you guys”.
This should also be extended to language used in policies and procedures in your workplace - does your HR department enable people to have a non-binary gender option in their records? Can you register a gender neutral title like Mx?
Bathrooms are a hot-button issue for many people who oppose trans rights. Many trans and non-binary people have been challenged and even faced violence, just for trying to use toilet facilities which every one of us needs.
(Cis people whose appearance doesn’t conform to standard gender sterotypes also get challenged as a consequence of these attitudes).
Where bathrooms are only labelled “Gents” or “Ladies”, trans and non-binary folk may feel unsafe about using either option! Hence bathrooms labelled as being for the use of all genders are helpful.
If your workplace has such bathrooms, make sure you know where they are, and point them out to colleagues as an available option. In the current climate, gender neutral facilities may not be prioritised, so let your employer know you think they’re important.
If your workplace doesn’t have such a bathroom, then consider suggesting it to the appropriate people in leadership. If allies make these suggestions, then it takes some of the burden of advocacy off the shoulders of trans and non-binary folks.
Another way to take the burden off the shoulders of trans and non-binary folks is to educate yourself about their identities and experiences, to develop awareness and sensitivity. We're aiming to post some resources later in the week to try to help with that.
In discussing trans issues, try to remember that for trans and non-binary people these questions are not just a matter of interesting ethical debate, but instead matters which speak to the core of their identity. “Clever” debating points can be accidentally harmful.
TIGERS threads normally have the name of an individual attached who takes ownership of what is said. This particular thread was written by several of us as a collective effort. We are also keen to draw some of the fire that arises on these issues away from our trans colleagues.
We hope this thread has helped people think about how to support trans colleagues. We’d love to hear from any trans people who’d like to correct, improve or add to our suggestions, and from other allies too. #TellTheTiger
