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Linus introducing his character in session 0:
Charlie Brown would 100% be the DM, for much the same reasons he's the manager of the baseball team and the director of the Christmas pageant: everybody just assumes he'll do the thankless organizational tasks so they can have a good time, while giving him zero respect/authority.
Picture Charlie Brown's excitement when he finds out that everybody else is into D&D. He's had all the books for years and was mocked for it but suddenly tabletop is cool and mainstream and he's got a bunch of character ideas he thinks he's finally going to be able to play.
And then he shows up and Lucy hands him the DM screen and tells him that since he already knows the game he can be the DM, then pulls out her character sheet with a completely OP homebrew Queen class.
Linus is a Cleric but he never prepares any spells because he believes it is a truer form of faith to simply put his trust in the heavens to see him through. He's just grinding until he gets the Divine Intervention feature, saying "This, too, shall pass." of every encounter.
Peppermint Patty is a Fighter and she spaces out during everything that's not combat and during every turn that's not hers. When Chuck asks her what she's doing, she suddenly sits upright and starts shouting out targets she's attacking, none of whom are on the map currently.
Schroeder plays a Bard, naturally, whose effectiveness is somewhat hampered on the battlefield by the fact that his implement of choice is a piano.
Marcy is a Wizard and she spends far too much of her time, out of character, researching her spells. She has a stack of splatbooks with index cards as bookmarks, and the index cards also have page references written on them for other books.
Like Peppermint Patty, she is frequently lost on what is happening in combat, but she asks Peppermint Patty because she always seems so confident, and more than once has dropped a fireball right on top of her.
Nobody else except Peppermint Patty realizes that he's even playing, but Snoopy is a particularly dashing multiclass Ranger/Rogue who winds up going off on his own unrelated solo adventures in his head when he acts out his attempts to scout ahead.
When the party encounters a locked door or trap, everyone else laments that they don't have any skill experts while Peppermint Patty wonders aloud where that kid with the funny nose got off to.
Frieda is a Paladin. I will take no follow-up questions.
5 joined for the first session but gave up because he just doesn't have a head for numbers.
Sally thought the whole thing was a waste of time when she found out it was all make-believe and math ("Dungeons? Dragons? It should be called DICE AND DICE!") until she found out Linus was playing.

She plays a Barbarian because Rage is the class feature she most innately groks.
Franklin is a Druid with a well-thought out but not spotlight-stealing backstory. He pays the most attention to the actual game and spends a lot of time helplessly wanting to just get on with the quest while others get lost in character bits or their own personal side plots.
Pigpen is a Warlock of the Old Ones whose patron is called The Creeping Filth. Frieda's Paladin frequently winds up having to tank for him in combat. She has to Lay On Hands at least once an encounter, over her strenuous objections.
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