Thread by @mipsytipsy

I somehow belong to a FB group for "Tech Ladies"(sic). I don't login often, but every time I do I see someone fretting over whether to quit her job.

It generally details asshole bullies, insane hours, and mind games at great length before plaintively inquiring..."should I quit?"

Short answer: yes, of course you should quit. You know that, after writing all this out. ☺️ But you're scared. So let's talk about that fear.

Your fear is rooted in uncertainty and lack of options.

Most of us think of interviews and job opportunities as a peculiar torture we are forced to endure every few years. We share horror stories, we act out of aversion and avoidance.

Which basically sets you up for guaranteed trauma.

What did we learn from continuous delivery? "If it hurts, do it more."

You are the shepherd and sole guardian of your career in tech. Your career is a multimillion-dollar appreciating asset. You probably deserve a better job than you currently have. 📈💜

Most of those things that make job hunting horrible and ego-depleting can be trivially managed by simply lowering the stakes.

Which is to say, practice interviewing when you *don't* need the job to survive.

Fact: interviewing is a skill like any other. Fads come and go. Questions make the rounds. Dip your toe in, see what's out there.

Another fact: there is a large element of randomness to *every* interview. It's not all about you -- not even close. (google.com/amp/s/charity.…)

It doesn't have to mean a major time commitment. Promise yourself you will interview somewhere at least once a year, no matter what.

If someone who knows you asks you to interview, default to yes. Don't angst over whether or not you are ready to quit. Just check it out!

If you keep this yearly commitment to yourself, sometimes you will be offered more money than your current job, or a better title or role.

This is great information! You don't have to take it; you are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you.

Another thing that bears mentioning is fuck you money. Whatever your finances, prioritize an emergency account with a few months' living expenses in cash.

There's a world of difference between being forced to take the first thing to pay rent, and having time to look around.

I've spent a lot of time puzzling over why job interviews seem so impossibly lopsided, even when candidates are hotly pursued and their skills in high demand.

There's a deep fundamental asymmetry of capitalism at work here. You can only have one full time job at a time; the company can hire many.

It's a much bigger bet for you than it is for the company, who can hedge their bets, distribute labor risk across a bundle of assets.

Your career is your biggest asset. Bigger than your house, bigger than your bank account (probably).

You have a responsibility to yourself, to your family, to manage this asset well. Make sure you are being compensated fairly. Make sure you know what's out there.

Don't feel disloyal for looking. This isn't the fucking mafia. None of us will be at our current job forever.

It's leadership's job to try and make sure this is the best place for you to work for as long as possible, and it's your job to know when that's no longer true.

I've been in this industry long enough to work with people I love, over and over. You will find each other again.

At honeycomb we have taken to calling it "graduation" when someone we love has to leave. It's bittersweet, but I'd never want anyone feeling pressure to stay.