Sexist, racist social media abusers who troll, demand to be seen and acknowledged even as they erase the race, gender, life stories of others. Note the LOL that seems so central to that abuser tone. The power move back at them? Deny their abuser needs. #GhostThem #BlockThem
Anyone who has been trapped with an abuser knows that it's all about control NOT communication. It is toxic.
People who do this online are likely to do it in their personal relationships, or will in the future. The online dynamic may, in fact, be a training ground, growing their appetite for control. When they get the need met, the need becomes stronger.
Interpersonal abusive control (not online) is almost always in private, because abusers KNOW the behavior is wrong, (would not be socially accepted.) So, online, many abusers construct victimhood stories about themselves used to justify abusing others. See: Incels
Because abusers on social media are visible (except in DMs), it has spawned an industry of victimization narratives which paint abusers as justified. This requires erasing, debating, gaslighting data and evidence about sexism and racism. It is amplifying gaslighting x1000
But it's never really about abusers debate the "facts." It's about constructing gaslighting "facts" that elicit a response, that keep the abusive dialogue alive, for one more exchange. It's an addiction.
Abusers think their goal with their constant debate/argument agenda is capitulation from their targets, but as we all know, no amount of capitulation is ever actually enough for them. Which means the argument isn't an argument at all. It's just more dominance and abuse.
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