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Guy Benson Profile picture
@guypbenson
Jul 18, 2020 • 11 tweets • 3 min read • Read on X
Ok, Twitter — pull up a chair, and buckle up for a wild, bizarre, hilarious story...
Have you ever heard of an online catfish scheme that actually and totally *worked,* in every possible way? I had not, until I found myself strangely in the middle of the following scenario...
A @GuyBensonShow listener named Michael DM’d me on Instagram (@guypbenson) a few weeks ago asking for a favor. I’m not typically inclined to entertain such requests from total strangers, but the backstory was irresistible...
Years ago, Michael’s cousin Alyson had a big crush on her very close friend, Dylan. She was stuck in the friend zone & frustrated. Michael hatched a scheme to invent a new love interest in her life, with the goal of making Dylan jealous & shaking him from his romantic slumber.
She is uncomfortable with the plan but Michael forges ahead with the creation of a fictional character: “Ryan Stevens.” He crafts a backstory about how Ryan and Alyson had met & needs a photo to match. He literally googles “generic white man”...
And on the very first page of the image results was this dashing young man:
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(lol at this, btw, especially given the fact that I’m wearing the ubiquitous gingham @jcrew shirt that every generic white guy owns. It’s my ~2011 headshot)...
So there’s “Ryan.” Michael & his brothers set out spreading the fake rumor & it gets to Dylan. He’s now aware of real (and very dreamy!!) competition. His deep feelings for Alyson bubble the surface due to this urgent situation, and he finally gets off his ass & makes a move...
They start dating. Ryan is promptly discarded like a bad habit (💔), as if he never existed (indeed, he did not). Eventually, the truth is revealed to Dylan: “Ryan” was a ruse. A catfish-type ploy that worked flawlessly. This becomes a running joke w/in the family/friend group...
And next Friday, Alyson and Dylan are getting married. Relatedly, they went semi-viral with a cute “news update” video about the unpleasantness of planning a wedding during a pandemic: bostonglobe.com/2020/05/05/nat…
So Michael — who did NOT know who the generic white man was at the time — is now a Fox viewer & a fan of my radio show’s podcast (free! ). As the wedding approached, he was thinking back on his chicanery & it suddenly dawned on him that it’s me in that pic.Guypbensonshow.com

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More from @guypbenson

Guy Benson Profile picture
Oct 24
🧵 Kamala Harris was asked twice tonight about a personal weakness or mistake & how she can learn from it. Her, um, ‘answers’ were that she’s very well-versed/prepared on issues, and that she has such an exceptional team around her. At first blush, these are laughable responses…
…because (a) these are not “weaknesses,” of course, and (b) she is infamously under-prepared/not well-versed — and she has sky high staff turnover due to the widely-reported toxic workplace environment she fosters. BUT, I think there was a flash of truth in these responses…
…She was asked about weaknesses and her brain clearly went straight to knowledge/preparation & staff. She tried, incoherently, to turn them both into humble brags, but she did highlight two areas of glaring weakness. She may have just inadvertently told on herself right there…
Read 4 tweets
Guy Benson Profile picture
Sep 4
🧵 ~10 days after Biden was forced out, a leader at a major right-leaning organization (which spends significant resources on high-quality, private polling) told me their data had taken a serious downward turn for Trump across key states & Senate picture looked worse…
…Trump’s leads were gone & he was trailing in several battlegrounds. In Senate races, most theoretically winnable races were looking like duds for the GOP. The trend continued…until it didn’t. There has been a rebound, now detectable over more than one poll in their series…
…whether you believe these numbers or not, the trend is notable. These were the results from polling that was in the field just before Labor Day weekend.

Top to bottom are Montana (polling due to Senate race), Ohio, Pennsylvania, Michigan, Nevada & Wisconsin: Image
Read 5 tweets
Guy Benson Profile picture
Nov 2, 2023
🧵27 days since Hamas terrorists massacred 1400 civilians. Israel delayed its invasion for weeks. Hamas leader JUST said they’ll launch endless 10/7-style attacks until Israel is annihilated. And major “pro-Israel” liberals are already going wobbly on Israeli self defense...


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Someone should tell CBS and the international pressurers that the “refugee camp” (not from this conflict) in question was attacked by Israel because Hamas has been *using it for its terrorism.* Fully legitimate target…
…it’s extremely reckless for someone like Durbin, in leadership, to embrace a “ceasefire.” Hamas violated the last ceasefire by butchering women and children. They respect nothing. A “ceasefire” prevents Israel from doing what must be done, and allows Hamas to regroup…
Read 4 tweets
Guy Benson Profile picture
Oct 24, 2023
🧵 I have now heard from multiple @UChicago students about something that happened on campus last week. Pro-Israel students followed the rules and reserved the quad for a rally. “Pro-Palestine” students showed up and did everything they could to drown out the event, an apparent violation of the school’s (good) free speech policy:
Note the “resistance is justified” chanting, which is hard to interpret as anything other than backing the Hamas massacre, given the context. I’m told this was the ‘Dean on call’ during the incident… Image
Students say the university has rules against disruptive conduct, defined as actions that include but are not limited to “obstruction, impairment, or interference with University sponsored or authorized activities or facilities in a manner that is likely to or does deprive others of the benefit or enjoyment of the activity or facility.” The “pro-Palestine” students were reportedly asked to move at some point. They did not, and the university did not enforce its policies. No word on any consequences…
Read 5 tweets
Guy Benson Profile picture
Aug 23, 2023
🧵 In the 2+ weeks since the fires ripped through Maui, the president has looked less like a concerned, empathetic national father/grandfather figure, and more like a detached retiree shuffling between vacations…
…and his curious brand of empathy has too often entailed embellishments and fabrications involving his own life — which is not at all a new phenomenon with him…
…I don’t know whether he was falling asleep at that event with victims and their families, but it sure looked like it. This is not the look for a president of any age…
Read 5 tweets
Guy Benson Profile picture
Jun 1, 2023
It’s pride month, which means it’s time for a lot of noise — from corporate posturing to culture warriors’ endless competing grievances (sometimes they have a point, on both “sides”). There are any number of things ‘Pride’ *doesn’t* mean to me — but here’s what it does:
I’m living my life to the fullest, as best I know how, while being truthful about who I am: A gay man. For years, I never expected this sort of life would be possible or accessible to someone like me. Despite my fear, I’ve never regretted finally accepting & sharing that truth…
“It gets better”💫 isn’t just a trite slogan for me. It’s been a powerful reality. While everyone’s situations & timelines are different, I believe that phrase applies in the vast majority of cases. Despite our immense progress, there are still many people who need to hear that…
Read 5 tweets

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