Thread by @VespertilioGem

Hello, my dear followers! Today is the third movie of the #Kissmatewatches Resident Evil series, Resident Evil: Extinction (2007) dir. by Russel Malcuhy. So far each movie has had a different director. It showed last movie. Let's see if it's better here!

/thread starts here

#Kissmatewatches After we get a few things set up, we'll start right away!

#Kissmatewatches Here's Ana's watch!

https://twitter.com/AnaMardoll/status/1291783460319879169

#Kissmatewatches We see Alice waking up in the shower again, per first movie. Like, shot for shot, scene for scene.
Did we put in the first movie by accident? No, because none of the Hive deaths were shown...

#Kissmatewatches She opens a door and now is in the Queen Laser Chamber! The lasers attack, but she escapes through the vents. Now she's in the empty hospital. She runs through the hallway pushing a gurney (to break the glass?) when a trap guillotine falls and breaks the bed!

#Kissmatewatches Is Alice in a personal obstacle course from Hell?
Oh shit, she stepped on a switch and a spread gun fired into her, killing her slowly. Scientists come in and takes samples before disposing of her.
What, was that a flashback? Are they making clones?

#Kissmatewatches An elevator hidden by a shack reveals the scientists dump Alice's body into a mass grave of other Alices. All I can think is "Where are they buying those dresses and black boots? Is it cheap? Being an apocalypse, you'd think those materials would be too costly."

#Kissmatewatches See, you keep the dead bodies of your experiments around, you just attract pests to eat them up! You want hoards of the undead surrounding your secret base? This is how you get hoards of the undead surrounding your secret base! Now it's not so secret!

#Kissmatewatches Alice tells us that the T-Virus wiped out human life in a month. But it doesn't just affect humans. "Lakes and rivers dried up, forests became deserts, and whole continents were reduced to nothing more than barren wastelands."
So the virus sped up global warming.

#Kissmatewatches Real Alice wanders into a trap set up by wasteland hillbillies. They aren't the fun Borderlands kind. Instead they're more the Texas Chainsaw Massacre kind.

#Kissmatewatches [rape] Fun fact, the guy trying to rape Alice plays Jason Stackhouse in True Blood! And I can't separate the two. It's so weird to see him force himself on someone. Me and Husband are both "JASON WOULD NEVER".

#Kissmatewatches Alice kills one of them. This freaks them out so bad that they throw her to the zombie dogs. Literally.
And suddenly I'm getting RE7 flashbacks. Don't know why. I blame the cannibalistic hillbillies.

#Kissmatewatches Alice unleashes the hounds back on the hillbillies and takes back off.
Again, the action could be way better as the camera is just too close. This is going to be a reoccurring problem through all the movies, isn't it?

#Kissmatewatches We see buses and semis drive through the desert being driven by Olivera and CLAIRE! Oh Claire, may they NOT do you wrong!

#Kissmatewatches We get a look at Umbrella, again in an underground bunker, and we see Wesker. Or a really bad-looking imitation of him. Oh boy. That could be improved on. For starters, more blond hair helmet. At least he's got the sunglasses-even-when-dark look going on.

#Kissmatewatches They talk about trying to reverse the effects of the virus in hopes of domesticating the zoms. It's that or have dead flesh monsters roam for decades.

#Kissmatewatches It's hard to listen because Wesker is the most dominant man in the room. Stares ahead, hands crossed on the desk, sunglasses hiding his eyes. I don't know if he's going to pull out a shotgun to end the meeting or order everyone quiet so he can hear his podcast.

#Kissmatewatches Holy Shit, ok, he may not LOOK exactly like Wesker, but he feels like Wesker. He moves like Wesker. He talks like I expect Wesker to talk. Maybe not perfectly, since it's been a while since I played the games, but they tried!

#Kissmatewatches Oh good, capitalism is figuring out how to make zombies a free labor source. That was inevitable. And all it takes is killing a woman and torturing her over and over again until results finally pan out. Umbrella is such a capitalist douche.

#Kissmatewatches Alice goes into a gas station, now deserted and nearly empty. She finds a journal left behind that speaks of an isolated area. I thought she wanted to kill all the zoms, though. Then again, all I know about she wants is she wants to survive.

#Kissmatewatches Claire's group comes across a hotel. There, LJ gets bitten, but he tells no one. That seems a bit OOC for him. Also, if this is a convoy that relies on being close to one another for long periods of time, you'd think there'd be a strict rule on that.

#Kissmatewatches In Umbrella, we see the domestication experiment isn't going great. The Doctor, after seeing someone beg for their life, just politely fixes his tie and walks away like he's thinking more about how to report this to the council than the blood he has on his hands.

#Kissmatewatches Claire's convoy is getting their night watch set up, and Alice is reading how Alaska is supposedly free of undead. Alice also breaks her motorcycle with her mind while sleeping. She's psychic? I knew she hurt that camera guy last film, but... the fuck?

#Kissmatewatches The Doctor Isaacs hears from the new Red Queen about a psychic outside. It's a different actress than before. Also, we don't get to see the girl we saved last film. What's up with that? She demand more pay?

#Kissmatewatches Claire's group wakes up to see infected crows surrounding them. They lose two vehicles and some nice people I liked. I'm just surprised LJ, knowing he's infected, didn't try to sacrifice himself for his girlfriend.

#Kissmatewatches Alice appears to give Olivera some flashbacks. She fills the sky with fire with her mind, then passes out. This feels a bit much. At this point, she could push over skyscrapers and kick lightning out of the sky and I'd be like "k, what's next?".

#Kissmatewatches Isaacs gets another clone killed, but at least he knows where Real Alice might be. Also, he's stepping over his limits and not telling Wesker everything. That's going to get him killed, or worse FIRED.

#Kissmatewatches Real Alice wakes in the convoy and meets a girl who feels VERY trans.
She doesn't like her old name, and everyone she knew is dead. They found her in a K-Mart, so she calls herself K-Mart. She even made a friendship bracelet for Alice.

#Kissmatewatches Alice says she left after last film because Umbrella was tracking her. She's afraid that they'll hurt those around her.
Problem is, she's right. Isaacs found her on the satellite imaging. "Welcome home," he says. I think he's talking about his promotion, not her.

#Kissmatewatches Isaacs tries to convince Wesker to get her back, but Wesker wants to wait. Why, I'm not sure, but I guess he's thinking about resources and men getting lost trying to get her back when he knows they can't.

#Kissmatewatches Claire's convoy heads to Alaska, even if it's just to give them hope. Problem is, they need a big pay-out in order to even start. Big cities mean big hoards, but it also means huge supply area. So, to strike it rich, they head to Vegas.

#Kissmatewatches Isaacs, on the other hand, makes an illegal voice profile based off Wesker to get men and supplies. Even though Wesker just told him no. But, if it gets him Alice, then he gets his results. And who can argue with results, right?
This plan is so fucking ludicrous.

#Kissmatewatches The convoy makes it to Vegas and sees how empty it looks. "Birds must have gone block by block. Picked it clean." Meanwhile, LJ isn't looking so good and still telling no one. This feels wrong.

#Kissmatewatches Isaacs dropped a storage unit full of zombies in the convoy's way, so now they have to fight through it! It makes for a GREAT action scene! There's kicking and shooting and scrambling for guns when on the ground. It reminds me of the first movie!

#Kissmatewatches Isaacs has a magic button to put Alice in a stunned state. Fortunately, Alice isn't one to go down easily. As her friends fight for their life, so she fights the conditioning. She wins by frying the satellite in space.

#Kissmatewatches Some convoy members die. LJ bites Olivera before dying himself. That feels very... bad.
Alice goes to Umbrella's little camp site and shoots it up, ruining Isaac's plan. After they fly off in a chopper, Alice gets an idea to steal that to go to Alaska.

#Kissmatewatches For now, Isaacs is allowed to fly off "home". He's been placed in "house arrest" while pumping himself full of the Cure. Turns out the supped-up zoms he made are super infected too. He may end up being one.

#Kissmatewatches Here, we have to take a break, as groceries don't buy themselves. We'll be back after a while!

#Kissmatewatches Back! Isaacs was on house arrest and looking sick.
Someone shoots him (the Umbrella version of firing an employee), but Isaacs gets right back up and does some very tentacly things to their new corpses. (Insert hentai jokes here.)

#Kissmatewatches We see Alice and Convoy scoping out the "secret" Umbrella base surrounded by zoms. They're hoping the antivirus will save Olivera, but it looks like he's going to sacrifice himself for the others. He did get bit after all.

#Kissmatewatches [self harm] Olivera drives into the heart of the hoard and takes one last smoke before going up in smoke himself. He takes out a bunch of the hoard, though. It's enough for Alice to barge in with the convoy and drive them close to the chopper.

#Kissmatewatches Alice gives K-Mart the journal to Alaska while she heads into the base. The convoy seems safe. They leave the movie. Maybe the less we see of them, the happier the ending we can imagine for them.

#Kissmatewatches Oh shit, Alice found the clone pit and she is not ok. She doesn't have time to emote, so it's going to end up being rage later.
She barges into the shack and... calls the elevator somehow? Literally never shows us. But, she's down there, so movie continues!

#Kissmatewatches The base looks empty in the "zombies got us" way.
Wow, that's a lot of bloody handprints. I'm imagining Isaacs going around making them.
"Yes, this will make a GRAND entrance when Alice finds me! She'll be so scared! I can't wait to see her face! *evil laugh*!"

#Kissmatewatches The new Red Queen (White Queen) tells her what's going on with Isaacs and how Alice is the only cure for the world. The only thing stopping them is Isaacs himself. So Alice goes in, expecting a fight for the world!

#Kissmatewatches After passing some of Isaacs' art pieces, Alice sees a clone of herself in suspended animation. After Isaacs attacks, the clone is released and in shock. Alice covers her like she's dead though. So is she dead, or....?

#Kissmatewatches Alice follows the blood trail to the beginning of the Clone Killer Course. Clone Alice helps in the fight though! She turned on the laser grid to kill him, but spare Real Alice! Yay for girls working together! I think? It was a short fight, either way.

#Kissmatewatches In Japan, we see Wesker and his council talking about continuing productions. Alice crashes the party, telling them to fuck off. We then see a possible ARMY of Alice Clones about to awake!
The End!

#Kissmatewatches This movie is much better than the second one! It has long sweeping shots, breathing room for the story, and better action scenes. Granted this movie isn't perfect, and still inferior to the first, but still has merits!

5/10, worthy of the popcorn popped for it.

@threadreaderapp unroll this plz