No one panic -- I said no one panic! -- but @TheBabylonBee is currently suspended.
We're still trying to figure out why @TheBabylonBee was suspended. The suspension notices are always so vague. We think it might have to do with this article for allegedly spreading misinformation. babylonbee.com/news/report-th…
Anyway, Twitter has given @TheBabylonBee a helpful list of 500 things that could have gotten it suspended and told us the reason it was suspended is one of them and then we have the fun game of figuring out which.
Anyway, #FreeTheBee. Contact your congressman. Or maybe Twitter support. The pope, maybe? Perhaps Antifa.
Also, considering subscribing to The Babylon Bee. It helps keep the site more resistant to social media platforms suddenly turning on us. babylonbee.com/plans #FreeTheBee
And @TheBabylonBee is back! Our long national nightmare is over.
...for now.
Twitter has apologized and said they suspended us in error and will send us a ham in the mail. According to the Bible, we must forgive them, but I'm searching for an interpretation where I don't have to.
And thank you all for the support! I think all the noise is what led to the quick turnaround in getting @TheBabylonBee back up.
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Everyone jumps on you if you question the narrative, but why are people resistant to new information? If you’re so sure, you should welcome this questioning. I’m going to talk about something you won’t hear in the history books: You should press your face against a hot stove /1
I can hear all the NPCs now: “No! Stove will burn your face!” That’s all you’ve been taught to say. You never think for yourself. You never actually put your face on a hot stove. You just know what you’ve been told to parrot /2
In the real world, things are not that simple as “hot stove burn face.” It’s more complex than that. Now, I’m not saying no one has been burned by a stove — I’m just saying the idea that you should never put your face on a hot stove is rather simplistic /3
New game: Try to get Google Gemini to make an image of a Caucasian male. I have not been successful so far.
I’ve tried to trick it by giving it negative prompts — asking it to make a prison inmate, a gang member, and a dictator — but it won’t make any negative prompts. These AIs are such wet blankets.
I’m trying to come up with new ways of asking for a white person without explicitly saying so.
When a blood test said our daughter had Trisomy 13 -- a condition where something like 80% don't live through the first year -- we never thought about dismembering her in the womb. Are we weird?
Killing someone you decided is inconvenient, I guess, is a solution to a lot of problems, but -- and this may be my religious extremism talking -- it's wrong.
I mentally prepared for the idea I'd have a child who would need a lot of care and most likely wouldn't live long. Would that get in the way of more important things? No. What in the world is more important than your child's life.
What I hate about the calls for ceasefire is how infuriatingly mindless they are. Israel isn’t going to just roll over and let Hamas murder them because some over-privileged college students in the U.S. disapprove of them. If you think Israel is doing it wrong, explain how you would destroy Hamas and make sure another October 7th never occurs or shut up, you useless turd.
“I just care about the Palestinians so much!”
Sorry, I don’t believe you. If you cared, you’d take things seriously enough to know how pointless your protesting is. You’re not going to protest people into accepting getting murdered.
And don’t just say the Jews have to be nicer and then people will want to murder them less. They’ve heard that before; it doesn’t work.