This is absolutely the right thing & I'm glad to see them prioririzing their family over politics. More of us need to do this, but there are challenges...
The Conways aren't the only family to be torn apart by the politics of the last 4+ years. And some won't survive the next 4 months. You know what I'm talking about.
I've watched as uncles come after nieces & nephews for posting their opinions. I've seen children dishonor their parents publicly. Entire extended families are fragmenting along political lines, consigning each other to the fires of hell for supporting for XYZ candidate.
B/c I exist in larger evangelical context, I've mostly seen it play out there, but I also think there's something particular happening in evangelicalism that strains the bonds of family in a unique way.
For those raised in evangelicalism, family, church, & politics were often a package deal. Not always, of course, but the intermingling of these separate spheres means that it's very hard for cradle evangelicals to separate them today. Pull one thread & it affects the entire cord.
Change your views on politics & don't be surprised if your relatives don't question your faith & even your commitment to them. And vice versa. Change your views on politics & you'll find yourself questioning the integrity of your relatives & their commitment to Jesus, too.
This isn't healthy, but it's what I've observed & it's what I have to fight against myself. For some of you, honoring the bonds of family above those of politics will be the work of this next season. And it will be work.
I want to give words to this b/c the Conways' experience is not unique. It may be magnified & it may be public, but it's a reality that a lot of families are facing right now. Even, & perhaps especially, evangelical families.
A couple things I've noticed in my own process:
1) Habits are hard to break. If you've been shaped to bind politics to family & church, you're going to continue to do this unless you actively resist & proactively reframe the role of politics.
1) Habits are hard to break. If you've been shaped to bind politics to family & church, you're going to continue to do this unless you actively resist & proactively reframe the role of politics.
2) Changing your mind about an issue or political party isn't the same thing as changing how you relate to politics. You could have been raised to see conservativism as the savior of morality & culture & simply shift to seeing progressivism as the same.
3) You'll probably need to build a richer understanding of family & begotteness--one that can survive when you're separated by political or religious differences. Research your family history: learn the good & bad. Make peace w/ it.
4) Don't expect that other family members will meet you half-way. Many won't & there will be a gap b/c of it. But for your own soul's sake, don't be the one who perpetuates the gap. Pray that God would make you a good child, niece/nephew, grandchild, aunt/uncle, cousin, sibling.
All that to say, I know many, many of you are suffering thru broken family relationships b/c of the current political environment. It is a realy & true grief. Name it & wrestle w/ it.
"But as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men"... even & especially w/ the family God has given you. Do not sacrifice your convictions; do not simply go quiet. But love well & let the love of God be at work in you.
This is the way forward. This is what will save society & culture. This kind of deep, hard work that seeks to live openly, honestly, & peacefully w/ those who seem to only know how to fight.
And b/c it needs to be said explicitly: Please, please maintain healthy boundaries w/ family members who seek to harm or manipulate you. Loving well & seeking peace must come from a place of freedom & openness. Absence of conflict is not peace & codependency is not love.
