We're gonna start drinking now to prepare for the live tweeting.
How drunk is too drunk to live tweet a press conference
Oh shit this isn't google
We've got a bit of a preview of what we are expecting tonight aside from seeing which piece of his grandmother's furniture Hugo de Jonge made his shoes out of. dutchnews.nl/news/2020/09/d…
Feel free to tune in: nos.nl/artikel/234631…
[No Irma. :((((((((]
Rutte: It is the first of September. [Thanks for the calendar update.]
Rutte: It is the first of September. [Thanks for the calendar update.]
Rutte says that they are having a press conference because it's the first of September. [This is worse than the Ides of March]
He says there is no unexpected news.
He says he wants to talk about where we are now and how the Netherlands is doing. "We cannot go around the numbers." [You can if you're Trump.]
He's had another conversation with young people about sticking to the rules. We have video of this:
He thinks that the 14 days of quarantine could become 10 as they learn more about the virus.
"We see that cases are stable," Rutte says. "We are at a plateau of 5000 per day." [That's a big ass plateau.]
He says the healthcare system can handle it and the famous r number (the number of people one person infects) is under 1 for the first time in a while.
He has decided that discos and clubs need to remain closed.
Rutte says that he realises how difficult the situation was in March and April for everyone and we don't want to go back to that so we have to keep the rules.
He says that we have done a lot, the schools are opening, the theaters as well. "You can grab a beer on the weekends," he says. [Just the weekends?]
And now we go to the car salesman himself, de Jonge.
He says that the lesson from the last month is that we can get and keep the virus under control. But it requires alertness and we must do it together.
It is good he says that people get tested but only if they have symptoms. The number of tests has increased from 100k to 160k.
He says they are doing everything to increase test capacity, they have more machines and more materials and they have contracted with laboratories in Germany to process more tests.
He says that they have learned a lot from the situation in care homes, that symptoms aren't always visible or recognizable. [Bit weird to only let people with symptoms get tested than ain't it?]
De Jonge gives a shoutout to the dashboard: coronadashboard.rijksoverheid.nl
He says that on the dashboard there is more local information and measures will continue to be done by region. "The situation in one gemeente can be very different from another."
"We want to stop the virus but not burden the local people and economy."
[Maybe someone should tell him that getting corona is really a burden?!?!]
He says they have five suppliers for vaccines and they are hoping to get the first vaccine in the first months of 2021.
First question, the number of hospital admissions is stable, so are the measures still required for everyone? [I mean do you want them to stay stable or...]
Rutte says [shocker] yes. He says it goes up like a hockey stick [god this is a very Dutch analogy]
Rutte says that they see in international party places (like Terschelling for example?] that outbreaks can happen.
Next question: Is the handhaven too strict? [..........]
Rutte says no, the goal is not to give fines but to get people to adhere to the rules.
Yet one more question from the NOS: This summer a lot of young people got infected but not old people. [There's a real morbid reason that accounts for some of that...]
De Jonge says it's still a problem because young people visit their grandparents and it spreads. [Does de Jonge know any young people...]
Another question about the handhaving [we really gotta decide on a word for this in English, dammit] regarding Grapperhaus. dutchnews.nl/news/2020/08/d…
Rutte says he still trusts Grapperhaus and that he's made a mistake and apologized for it.
Follow up: Shouldn't there be a clear national policy? Rutte says the fines for breaking the mask and the 1.5 mtr rules are national. Rutte admits that mistakes have been made in communication.
Another question: Is there a plan b if there aren't enough tests? [I mean aren't we already on plan k or something with this?] De Jonge says that they have to set priorities from the point of view of fighting the disease.
Someone asks a question about this digital session that Rutte mentioned earlier will be like. Rutte says with everyone. [Should we join...?]
There's a question about regional enforcement. [De Jonge is getting paid by the word again. We kinda tuned out.]
He says that they will make it clear why some regions have different rules than others. [Hopefully with an improved communication strategy given what Rutte said earlier.]
A question to Rutte about expert advice. We are getting advice from the Outbreak Management Team [Why do the Dutch randomly use English words for things?] but will there be other insight?
Rutte says their policy is based on the OMT and he says there is a healthy debate in society about things and it is important to talk to those voices. [Great, while you're talking to them can you ask them exactly how they think 5g is causing a virus?]
Rutte is taking a page from de Jonge's playbook and talking until we fall asleep.
Ohhh a corona app question. dutchnews.nl/news/2020/08/n…
What will come first: the corona app or the sun exploding and destroying the planet?
Ok that wasn't the question. The question was: how useful is the app if you can't get tested?
De Jonge says the shortage is temporary [it's actually been a permanent fixture of this pandemic but go on] He says that the policy is to get tested only if you have complaints, in some cases, they are testing more widely. [This is not an answer]
Follow up question which was just repeating the first question and de Jonge wants to know if you want the extra features this fantastic vehicle has.
He says the app is effective in ways other than testing which how do you know considering there is no app we are getting another drink
A question about how you stop people from going to another region if you have regional restrictions? [Well Flevoland will be fine.]
De Jonge says that you can keep an eye on neighboring regions [because corona only travels by electric car with a short battery life, good for the environment].
What happens if the regions can't agree? [You sell Brabant back to Belgium I assume?] I will, says de Jonge.
The government says a vaccine is a saving grace. Do you take into account that it won't be? De Jonge says they have to look at what is coming out of the research and that development goes a lot faster than usual.
He says a vaccine is our best bet but they are looking at other things, like treatments which have already gotten better.
[Is de Jonge's strategy to talk the virus to death?]
Is there a plan if vaccines come later? De Jonge says "You seem to suggest there's a better alternative." [You're the health minister, you should have some alternatives!!!]
He says that a vaccine is the best card we've got.
Can we say that things went horribly wrong in care homes? [Now there's a question.] De Jonge says of course there were mistakes. [We're running out of mistakes related gifs]
He says that we need a good evaluation. [You do realize this isn't launching a new flavor of milkshake right....?]
A question about masks from the OMT. De Jonge says there will always be differences of opinion.
[Forget the bingo card, just drink every time de Jonge literally repeats himself.]
[Ok we've died of alcohol poisoning now sorry]
New question: In health care evaluations are very important, why are you avoiding evaluations and focusing on lessons learned? De Jonge says they do want evaluations but they don't think they can evaluate as things are happening. But you can learn lessons.
A question to Rutte: What will the Netherlands look like in the coming months? Rutte says we have to protect us from the virus and still live our lives as normal as possible. [Gotta doe normaal]
If there is a vaccine, can we go back? Rutte says if there is and it works, then yes. We can go back to cuddling each other. [BUT NO MORE THREE KISSES THAT TRADITION IS DEAD]
Do we need [long term/permanent] infrastructure for testing? Rutte says that's a lesson we need to learn in the long term. We need to strengthen some things but we will have to see what and where.
Question about discos and nightclubs? Rutte says he hopes they can open but they need to see numbers. We happily haven't seen the explosion in numbers like in France and Spain.
Question about care homes and masks: De Jonge says that if there are a lot of cases in the region, they can take more preventative measures but the OMT needs to look into what those measures should be.
[C'mon de Jonge we aren't all getting paid by the word.]
Question: Do we need to test more? [How many times is this going to get asked...] de Jonge says they are doing asymptomatic testing in care homes, there is more testing, etc etc the same thing he's said the last two times this question was asked.
Ok that's it did we all survive?
If you've got some extra money that you didn't spend on vodka to get you through that press conference, feel free to kick it our way so we can pay our bar tab and therapist bills: dutchnews.nl/donate-to-dutc…
Our story will be out shortly.
Here ya go: dutchnews.nl/news/2020/09/c…
