Goveller’s Travels
Wednesday 9th September 1727
The author is entertained in Blefuscu;
Three days after my arrival the Blefescun Emperor laid on an entertainment, a playhouse favourite about the secret-agent called ‘Blonde’, a parody of the Lilliputian deputy-emperor whose
Wednesday 9th September 1727
The author is entertained in Blefuscu;
Three days after my arrival the Blefescun Emperor laid on an entertainment, a playhouse favourite about the secret-agent called ‘Blonde’, a parody of the Lilliputian deputy-emperor whose
crime-fighting escapades left behind almost as many fatherless children as his IT lessons. A little six inch actor portrayed the slobbering kebab of a man most excellently and that I might hear them, a banked choir of one hundred Blefescuns regaled me with his most celebrated
one-liners and drivelalities: ‘Leave means leave’, ‘Get Brexit done’, ‘Level up’, ‘Oven-ready’, 'erect my tent', ‘I thought Saturday was my access day’ and 'sack that civil servant'. After, the Blefescuns did very much wonder at my encounters in Lilliput so to
give them a flavour I reported the goings of a single recent morning there whereupon:
A sixth senior civil servant in a year resigned over their arrant hypocrisy; The Fridgelante Boris claimed the oven-ready Lilliprexit
A sixth senior civil servant in a year resigned over their arrant hypocrisy; The Fridgelante Boris claimed the oven-ready Lilliprexit
he had negotiated, secured and commended, didn’t make sense; their most venal Miniatures voted against implementing recommendations that might prevent a repeat of an tragically avoidable fire; A gang of self-deluded Rambos called the ERG sent a letter attempting to enforce
economic sanctions upon their own country; speaking freely and under no pressure, a Health Miniature one Nadir Dorries, claimed that nobody had said the plague would be over by Christmas when several members of her own party had said precisely that; And Brandon Lewis, the
human hamburglar, committed the entire nation to breaking International Law in a ‘very specific and limited way’. And to reiterate, all this had happened before I’d eaten my vegan calzone for lunch.
They listened agog, entertained and incredulous yet big enough,
They listened agog, entertained and incredulous yet big enough,
considering their six inches, to feel sympathy for these fools, grown so deluded on fantasies, flags and laughing at others, they hadn’t realised that it was they, who had become the laughing stock.
And many thanks to @Michelangela75 for knocking this up on the old etchasketch.
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