Omar Bazza Profile picture
Sep 18, 2020 11 tweets 2 min read Read on X
[THREAD] it has been a while since I wanted to have an honest conversation about timelines for recoveries when it comes to mental health. We often see it when we google symptoms or try to educate ourselves about clinical psychology, but it is so misleading and can backfire.
I don’t like giving timelines for recoveries because the complexity of mental health is hard to measure with time. There are too many components that come into play from how long it takes a client to trust their therapist, amount of opening up, environment clients live in, etc...
Those factors will play a big role. Furthermore, some clients may downplay the severity of their symptoms and it may take longer for them to heal. One component that is the biggest wildcard is the environment. Clients spend 1 hour once a week or once every two weeks with us.
The rest of the 167 to 335 hours are spent in their environment. If that environment is abusive, neglecting or contributes in a significant way to what they are experiencing, it will slow down the recovery significantly.
However, we have these timelines that we have to abide by because we are often forced to. Many agencies that provide free therapy have session limits, health insurances only cover a certain number of sessions, workplaces may only give a few days if any for mental health leave.
That leaves those who are the most vulnerable including minorities, women and low income populations in a state where it is hard to get adequate treatment. It is one of the biggest reasons why therapy is still considered something that only the privileged can access.
Given that mental health is a strong component of our ability to concentrate, be productive and motivated, it can make it harder to get promotions or raises and keep individuals who are already vulnerable from improving their quality of life.
These timelines have mainly been researched for white middle class men for the most part and then moulded into a whole system. This system, whose goal is to achieve recovery continues to oppress those who need it most because the blind spots are huge.
The pandemic has also thrown this whole timeline to disarray. Recoveries now take longer because we are stuck at home, because we no longer have jobs or can no longer see our loved ones. Yet, we do not see systems changing to address those increased needs.
Finally, I want to talk about stigma. Guess what happens when we don’t recover by the expected timeline. People start losing their patience. Employers say: “you have gone to therapy, why are you not better?”. Family members and partners start to question our motivation to recover
It is important for us therapists and others within that system to question it and improve it because it is not going to be insurances or others who profit from it who will actually take those steps towards an equitable access to mental health!

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More from @bazzapower

Jan 25
[THREAD] let’s talk about people pleasing behaviours. This tendency for us to want to sacrifice our well-being for the benefit of others is deeply ingrained in us from a very young age, in a deliberate way. As adults, it can make it difficult to establish boundaries.
When we talk about people pleasing, it is to the point that saying the word “no” is so hard for us that we would rather suffer than displease someone even if we do not know them well. These behaviours are very much a control mechanism.
Even when we are young children, people around us tell us that our comfort zone doesn’t matter. Whether it is pressure to go “hugging” someone even though we don’t feel comfortable to our parents telling us that conforming is more important than feeling safe.
Read 11 tweets
Aug 2, 2022
[THREAD] let’s talk about perfectionism. It can be destructive and add even more to our existing depression and anxiety. It also impacts our self-esteem because perfection is a standard that cannot be achieved and therefore, we may feel in a constant state of failure.
Perfectionism is defined as the need to be perfect and feel that there is a perfection status that we can achieve. It can become a goal for everything we do from work, to our social life and relationships. We may try to control or tweak things constantly to achieve it.
Just as with most issues related to mental health, it has its roots in our childhood. We live in a culture that is highly comparative. We grew up listening to us being compared to others when it came to school, and how to be a “good” kid. These “others” were the perfection.
Read 18 tweets
Jul 29, 2022
[THREAD] Let’s talk about an important topic that is not discussed often: self soothing. It is how we regulate our emotions/provide ourselves with the support necessary when we are not well. This mechanism is often broken because of our caregivers but can be learned as adults.
Parts of self soothing behaviours can be more on the innate side. For example, infants using pacifiers, seeking caregivers, etc. as a way to regulate their emotions when they are under distress or when they need something. Communicating distress and soothing it starts from day 1.
However, shortly after infancy, that process is derailed, specifically in our cultures, where showing your emotions may not be encouraged. For example, there are many of us as kids who may have been punished more if we cried. We could not get angry with parents.
Read 19 tweets
Jul 19, 2022
[THREAD] I often get asked why it is important to process our emotions and our past because it can be such a painful process to dig up, live those memories again and feel that pain and grief. On the surface, it may seem counterproductive to dig up something asleep in our minds.
While it is true that processing emotions can be a painful process and one that is likely to create strong emotions that can be unpleasant, it is also the reason why it is important to dig them up and process them.
For emotions/traumas/losses that we have properly processed, we wouldn’t feel a sharp pain/these strong emotions all over again. We may feel a small amount of it but not the intense powerful ones. The reason why is simply because the processing didn’t happen in the past.
Read 18 tweets
Jul 6, 2022
[THREAD] Let’s talk about love bombing. I talked about it often in other threads related to relationships/manipulation but it deserves its own thread because it happens more often than we think. It may not always be done with nefarious intent but it leads to harm down the road.
In this situation, we will define love bombing as unsustainable levels of affection, validation and resources that is given very early on in the course of a friendship or relationship but cannot be sustained long term because it is too intense.
There are two reasons why that may happen. The first one is something we discussed in previous threads where it is done to make the other person develop feelings quickly and become dependent on us. At that point, the love bombing can stop and manipulation/abuse start.
Read 20 tweets
Jun 16, 2022
TW: manipulation/partner abuse
[THREAD] While going over my notes for cases in the last year, I noticed a disturbing trend. There are many cases where, intentionally, the guy (mostly) pretends to be open minded/ally as a way to create love then become abusive.
It usually starts with love bombing, aligning their goals with the person they are pursuing, making sure to mention that they are different from other guys. They are not looking for traditional values that many women don’t want anymore. The first few months are usually perfect.
They are romantic, attentive, validating, and offer something closely resembling unconditional love. They escalate the relationship to “serious” status as soon as they can. Once the other person is in love with this “perfect” relationship, changes are usually drastic.
Read 13 tweets

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