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Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
@mynamesnotgordy
Sep 19, 2020 • 11 tweets • 3 min read • Read on X
What I learnt on the Twitter this week:

1. O'Toole says Ontario's Health Minister Trudeau isn't doing his job.
2. CPC outraged about federal spending. Provincial Conservatives demand more federal money. Hospitals report spike in ER visits for incidents of Conservative Whiplash.
3. Ontario's COVID cases match June's highs. Ford and Elliott encourage people to get out and buy Smile cookies at Timmy's.
4. Doug says house parties and weddings are the cause of COVID spike. Says, now that Mother's Day and Stan Cho's wedding are done, it's time to buckle down.
5. Kenney applies to Fed gov't for a CHIP Reverse Equalization Mortgage. Says his mom's retirement home needs a new hot tub.
6. Schweitzer says "Alberta is the new player in Canadian tech innovation!" Releases statement via his MySpace page.
7. Wexit changes name. No one notices.
8. Doug says people who ignore pandemic protocols "are a few fries short of a Happy Meal!" and then heads off to continue his cross-Ontario election campaign.
9. Ford cabinet votes down 15-student class caps. Lecce says everything's still on the table. As long it's easy and free.
10. New Brunswick voters exchange their Con minority for Con majority. Say they're tired of everyone only being sad for Ontario and Alberta these days.
11. Kenney insists pipeline must be built to east coast or people may begin noticing zero job creation taking place in Alberta.
12. Alberta's Ed Min LaGrange says she's not ducking media, she's just very busy, organizing stuff under her bed.
13. Kenney says UCP not cutting Disability Support payments, only cutting off people relying on them.
14. Matt Wolf launches 'Disability with Dr Matt' show on Twitter
15. ON's Chief Medical Officer says, although case numbers in Ontario have returned to June levels, Ontario is not experiencing a second wave. That's it. That's the funny part.
16. Lecce, the Education Minister, wants students to get "good paying jobs." Yes. Jobs that pay good.
17. Smoke from west coast wildfires engulf BC skies. James Woods not sure why Canadian/US border didn't block ANTIFA smoke.
18. Trump says fires caused by exploding trees built at factories in Blue States.
19. Mitch McConnell is the bag on one of those feminine cleansing devices.
20. Freeland gets Trump to drop 10% trade tariff. O'Toole says if PM he would have also negotiated 2 free nights at a Trump Hotel* (*at participating hotels in Texas)
21. Blanchart tests positive for COVID après meeting with Doug. Doug insists they never shared their Happy Meals.
22. Thousands of angry Mountain Equipment Co-op members protest sale to US company; park their vintage VW Westfalias in front of store entrance.
23. Entire Ford cabinet encourage people to buy Smile cookies to help support charities Ford government would likely close if it could.
24. We've hit the six month mark on this pandemic thing. It's been a bit of haul. But, on the up side, the weather's been great, no?

25. Ruth Bader Ginsburg. She fought hard. For good things. For human decency.

The world needs more Ruth Bader Ginsburgs.

• • •

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More from @mynamesnotgordy

Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
Jul 1, 2023
Canada. Not just ketchup chips and hockey stars:

1. Insulin: Developed by Sir Frederick Banting and Charles Best, it revolutionized the treatment of diabetes.

2. Canadarm: The iconic robotic arm used in the Space Shuttle program, enabling vital operations in space.
3. IMAX: The immersive cinematic experience that transports audiences with larger-than-life visuals and sound.

4. Electric Wheelchair: Invented by George Klein, power wheelchairs provide increased mobility for individuals with disabilities.
5. Snowblower: Arthur Sicard's creation made clearing snow a breeze, saving countless hours of manual labor, and leaving more time for Caesars.

6. Pablum: A nutritious infant cereal developed by Frederick Tisdall, Theodore Drake, and Allan Brown, improving child nutrition.
Read 10 tweets
Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
Mar 6, 2022
What I learnt on the Twitter this week:

1. Ontario Health Minister/Dep. Premair says she's leaving politics. The 18th MPP to leave his team; Doug Ford blames Kathleen Wynne.
2. Asked what he thinks about Putin and Ukraine, Doug Ford says he doesn't watch much European hockey.
3. Ontario's fiscal watchdog reports Ford government held back $5.5B of federal support money. Doug Ford defends lack of spending during a pandemic, says new highway being built through the Greenbelt will improve people's lives more than saving people's lives ever would have.
4. Jason Kenney attacks Edmonton professor on Twitter. Says he's had enough of people using humour on social media to make a point. Says if Brock Harrison can't do it, nobody can.
5. Asked what will constitute a mandate in leadership vote Kenney says 50% plus 1. Winks at his mom.
Read 13 tweets
Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
Feb 20, 2022
What I learnt on the Twitter this week:

1. Doug Ford says "Ontario is done with Covid!" Announces Ontario closing Covid on March 1st. Ford goes on to say he's also had it with the Greenbelt.
2. Doug Ford helps clear occupiers out of downtown Ottawa by offering free fishing.
3. Jason Kenney says Alberta has no need for federal Emergencies Act measures, argues his government can do nothing at all without federal support.
4. Jason Kenney reads "politicking" as "potlicking." Paging Dr. Slip. Paging Dr. Freudian Slip.
5. Ottawa occupiers build two-foot-high snow wall to try to slow approaching police. National Post captions photo, "Protestors help clear Ottawa sidewalks of snow."
6. Rupa Subramanya reports Trudeau is sneaking into occupiers' encampment late at night and stealing their kittens.
Read 18 tweets
Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
Feb 13, 2022
What I learnt on the Twitter this week:

1. Province of Ontario unveils its new tourism campaign: "Stay in Ottawa one night, get the next month's nights free."
2. Doug Ford declares State of Emergency, empowering Ottawa Police to now stop serving coffee and help with moving fuel.
3. Interim CPC Leader Candice Bergen says Trudeau must work with occupiers to negotiate an end to the siege the CPC helped provoke.
4. Doug Ford takes break from snowmobiling long enough to ensure Windsor's Ambassador Bridge is open for ten minutes.
5. City of Toronto closes several main arteries to prevent access to downtown area by convoy. City of Ottawa says, "Oh, sure, if you want to do it THAT way."
6. City of Ottawa says Constant Honking is newest Winterlude event, launched to replace too-quiet ice sculpting exhibits.
Read 18 tweets
Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
Feb 6, 2022
What I learnt on the Twitter this week:

1. Ottawa Police Chief says there may not be a policing solution to policing people. Hires PR firm to stop himself from saying stuff like that anymore.
2. CPC caucus decides party members should not be free to decide who should be leader.
3. Gofundme suspends campaign for groups occupying downtown Ottawa. Florida Governor questions gofundme's meddling in Canadian freedom.
4. Area lawyer launches class action law suit against Ottawa occupiers. Convoy spokesperson Dale says they will honk their horns at court order.
5. Jason Kenney stands up to truckers blocking border by apologizing to them for any inconvenience people trying to cross the border are causing them.
6. Kenney announces that to ensure freedom his government will dictate what municipalities can do to keep people safe in cities.
Read 14 tweets
Barney Panofsky's Best Intentions Profile picture
Jan 30, 2022
What I learnt on the Twitter yesterday:

1. Trudeau took down April's blogs and turned off her Facebook and April's not having it.
2. Sometimes it's hard to focus on all the protesting and fighting for the freedoms when there's beers and dogs being served the next tailgate over.
3. Masks are an affront to our freedom but pooing anywhere you want is a Constitutional right.
4. If you can afford to drive across the country for some sightseeing and a party, maybe pack enough food that you don't need to steal food from Homeless People in the middle of winter?
5. If you're a CPC MP passing out coffee to people who are peeing on the War Memorial always look around for Nazi flags before you do a CBC interview.
6. People who suggest Terry Fox would have run alongside the truck convey are likely as dim-witted as you think they look, yes.
Read 11 tweets

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