45th Parallel Profile picture
Sep 23, 2020 8 tweets 2 min read Read on X
I will concede that “Robert and the fine people who listen to his podcasts” is a funny answer.

However, the ad as a cultural artifact also indicates a world where plutocrats skim twitter and then idly make calls to their broker to buy stock in knife missiles—->
And government functionaries with DoD purchasing power, utterly unqualified for their positions, entirely unfamiliar with the world of defense contractors, and absolutely wrecked by petty abuse from their superiors, skim twitter between receiving tweet-orders from the president->
And random queers in portland check twitter to see what kind of stochastic terrorism representatives of the federal government are encouraging this week, so we can shitpost about it.

And twitter’s algorithm is like “these people should all know more about @RaytheonDefense!” —>
And it’s certainly partly due to our friend, who we’ve been repeatedly chemical-weaponed with, making jokes about being funded by the Knife-Missle guys.

So once again, life under the increasingly unstable late capitalist hegemony of the 2020 United States is the best. ~>
And yes, getting this ad might also have something to do with our habit of blocking the vast majority of promoted tweets.

But, as indicated by that ad,
Nothing can block a Raytheon (tm)
Since we’re talking about Foucault’s Boomerang:

Wish Michel was around to get this image pushed at him on twitter.

He woulda gotten a kick out of it, comparable to the recoil kick of an Excalibur weapons system.

Or the high kicks that gentleman can do in his little shorts.
Don’t caption this.

Don’t say “Precision” or “Excalibur” for this image of two men delicately attending to the missile which stands erect between them.

Don’t mention how the man on the left has removed a glove to caress the missle’s warhead, revealing a wedding band.

Do. Not. Pretty much what the tweet says. Two soldiers stand with an

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More from @45thabsurdist

Apr 30, 2022
Just leaving this here for when we need it later. Polítical compass with the Tankie Quadrant marked “everyt
Updated to account for centrists: Same chart, but with the x-y axis intersection point labeled
We here at the Brigade would like to

1: express our confusion that this blew up,

2: wish y’all happy mayday, &

3: remind readers that Property & the State are silly stories that can only be told in tandem, & get people killed.

Everything for Everyone, Nothing for Ourselves.
Read 4 tweets
Apr 28, 2022
Doesn’t take much imagination to figure out why two white dudes are running to unseat Hardesty- she’s the only Black lady to ever serve on city council, and the only PPB critic of the bunch.

So save your imagination for the question of “what is Vadim hiding in his mouth?” Vadim makes a weird faceHe makes it in every picture.The difference is always ho...
look at those eyes. That’s not a smile. That’s not what he’s doing with those teeth.

He might be trapping a small, feebly struggling rodent in there, but he’s definitely not smiling.
Could be worse: he could have zero public experience and the enthusiastic endorsement of the Portland Police Association wweek.com/news/city/2022…
Read 6 tweets
Aug 29, 2021
As school starts in a few days, it’s easy to get mad at PPS for their safety protocols, because they are BAD.
However the bigger problems are the directives from the Oregon Health Authority (OHA) and the Oregon Department of Education (ODE). So let’s take a look:🧵
First, we have the PPS “Swiss Cheese Model,” which PPS diagrams as shown. It’s a system that relies on a series of nested and hopefully redundant layers. But if only a few layers are holding up the whole mess, then it’s going to fall apart, and there’s going to be outbreaks. 1/
The big thing to know about the PPS Swiss cheese model is that, however insufficient each layer of protection is in this plan, ODE has also removed a bunch of allowed layers, & PPS’s covid plan is bad precisely because it only meets the state’s minimum covid safety standards. 2/
Read 26 tweets
Aug 28, 2021
Once upon a time, Perdue Pharma spent decades convincing doctors that the best medical science supported getting the whole country hooked on opiates.
Anyway now people don’t trust doctors when they say “this new vaccine is the only thing that helps covid, don’t take horse paste.”
Weird how a Byzantine medical system of grotesquely unethical for-profit firms, with wildly unequal access & outcomes, where life-saving care is regularly and arbitrarily withheld, would engender this kind of mistrust in the midst of a devastatingly mismanaged pandemic.
It sure doesn’t help that the main website that the Horse Paste People are getting their info from looks as legit as the Mayo Clinic or WebMD, or that it links to a bunch of seemingly legitimate medical studies that are difficult to parse or evaluate without a medical degree.
Read 5 tweets
Aug 20, 2021
So I decided to tune into the “choose love” press conference by Ted Wheeler. So far singers are singing about choose love and following god.

I wonder if the mayor will address the concerns about far right extremists coming into Portland to fight people
Here are some of the groups asking for action this morning:
Apparently Ted would like to address the multitude of problems facing Portland by asking residents to “Choose love”. I’m not shitting you. That’s his opening speech.
Read 26 tweets
Jun 3, 2021
Just to be clear: 1 year after George Floyd's murder & the burning of the 3rd Precinct, after the mayor vowed to permanently preserve George Floyd Square as a memorial & city council voted to disband MPD, the city cleared George Floyd Square & shot someone dead on the same day.
Correction: City of Minneapolis is ATTEMPTING to clear George Floyd Square.
Read 4 tweets

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