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John Hayward Profile picture
@Cobretata
Sep 23, 2020 • 5 tweets • 1 min read • Read on X
Hi, this is the police, texting you one hour in advance under our new rules of engagement to let you know we'll be swinging by for a raid. If you feel like shooting at us, would you kindly ask unarmed residents of your home to clear your line of fire? Thanks in advance!
Hi, this is your 15-minute update on the upcoming raid. Quick reminder - we'll be knocking, ringing your doorbell, slipping a note under the door, and floating balloon animals outside your window to let you know we've arrived. Check the back of that note for a fun pizza coupon!
After your police raid is complete, we'll be sending you a brief survey so you can let us know how you enjoyed the experience. Be sure to indicate how many shots you fired, what caliber of bullet you used, and your preferred media narrative for how it was all our fault.
Thinking about starting a riot anyway? Sorry our customer service didn't meet your expectations, but the police department is excited to announce a new partnership with U-Haul to bring you discount prices on truck rental for distributing your Mostly Peaceful Protest supplies!
Please take a moment to rate your experience with these raid reminder messages (1 worst, 5 best):

1. Die, white supremacist pigs, die
2. F**k the police
3. Abolish the police
4. Defund the police
5. Reform the police

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More from @Cobretata

John Hayward Profile picture
Mar 12
Among the strangest features of GOP internal battles - be it NeverTrump, or conservatives displeased with nominees like McCain or Romney - is this notion that it would be better to throw an election to the Dems and hope a better Republican nominee comes along next time.
How can anyone still seriously think that way, especially after Obama's "Pen and Phone" dictatorship and Biden wiping his posterior with the Constitution to plow ahead with his student loan vote-buying scheme? No, guys, it is NEVER safe to just toss a few wins to the Dems.
Maybe it's a form of projection, a stubborn illusion that the Dem candidate might be relatively harmless and inert in office, as GOP leaders sometimes are. Those illusions should have been utterly shattered by now.
Read 15 tweets
John Hayward Profile picture
Feb 29
When pundits wrote a decade or two ago that corruption would become the big story around the world, I was skeptical. People love to COMPLAIN about corruption, sure, but few electorates are prepared to take decisive action against it.
Corruption is absolutely inherent to Big Government. Repeat after me, and teach your children: THERE ARE NO CLEAN BIG GOVERNMENTS. Amassing huge amounts of power and money in a central State is like dropping sugar cubes amid anthills.
One reason Big Governments never get clean is they have so many weapons at their disposal to distract the public from anti-corruption initiatives. Key segments of the electorate get paid off, too. Big Media is easily drawn into the cesspool and made comfortable.
Read 13 tweets
John Hayward Profile picture
Feb 22
It is difficult to combat totalitarianism through electoral politics because the whole point of totalitarianism is to seize control of elections. They terrorize and propagandize people for years, then hold a "vote" to find out if their techniques were at least 51% effective.
Defeating totalitarianism requires spirited resistance and good humor. Mock them and make them look ridiculous. They can't stand it, because they are driven by self-righteousness. Totalitarians are small people who need to feel large by joining herds and crushing outsiders.
Defy them at every turn. Go where you aren't supposed to go, say what you're not supposed to say, and do it all with a smile. Exhaust their resources while refusing to become demoralized. Raise the price of totalitarianism by bankrupting its corporate partners when possible.
Read 20 tweets
John Hayward Profile picture
Feb 5
The greatest threat to democracy at present is the deliberate effort to erase nationhood and citizenship through mass migration, against the express wishes of citizens.
You don't have much of a "democracy," much less a constitutional republic, if the ruling elite can ignore voters to erase the border and shower benefits and privileges on foreign nationals. It's an explicit rejection of national sovereignty.
You don't have any kind of "democracy" if the Ruling Class can use mass migration to create a new electorate that votes the way it wants. Votes have little power if the rulers can dilute them at will.
Read 13 tweets
John Hayward Profile picture
Jan 30
The Democrat Party grows increasingly less interested in pretending it cares about American citizens, or feels any sense of duty toward America as a nation. The Party was never really good at this, but at least it used to make some modest efforts.
As I've written previously, every Democrat thinks their Sacred Agenda is far more important than any vestigial sense of duty they might feel toward the American people. There is no "American people" to them, just groups of favored constituents and despised enemies.
America isn't really a legitimate nation under Dem ideology, which frees them of feeling any sense of responsibility to the country as a whole, or any weight of tradition that might interfere with their quest for power. They see not one nation under God, but the Balkans.
Read 14 tweets
John Hayward Profile picture
Jan 19
This once again has me thinking about how everything went nuts in American youth culture during the Great Anti-Bullying Crusade, which was really more about the Left studying and adopting classic bully tactics to impose its ideology on vulnerable young people.
One element of the growing social discontent in America today is that you have an entirely feminized Mean Girls ruling class wielding increasing levels of compulsive force to impose its ideology on an essentially masculine middle and lower class.
It's like those Middle Eastern countries where a Shiite minority rules over a restless Sunni population, or vice versa. Centralized power has grown to totalitarian levels, and it's concentrated in the hands of a political elite that shares nothing of the majority's worldview.
Read 11 tweets

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