Thread by @keguro_

now that I am old and very conservative, I must confess I am distressed by the absence of foot fetishism on here

not enough of you are sucking on toes

and I don't mean those pretty feet that have been pampered and loved

I'm talking those feet that run marathons and walk over thorns and kick ostriches—DO NOT KICK OSTRICHES—and can be used when shops are out of sandpaper

those feet

now, those are true feet

it's like
you know

(I am cursed with beautifully soft hands—NO MATTER WHAT I DO)

so, like, hands with texture
those are interesting hands

raspy hands
oh, yes

BUT WE WERE TALKING ABOUT FEET!

anyway, as I once said, foot fetishism is difficult in a country with jiggers