Thread by @ovshake42

Douglas Jardine, Cricket's Iron Duke, was born on this day, 1900.

Two things sum him up.

First, he hated Australians with a passion.

And secondly, he hated losing. To him, cricket was nothing but war.

Let us go over the two points.
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Not only did Jardine hate Australia, he never bothered to hide his feelings.

Even before the Bodyline tour, when it became known that he had been named captain, his coach Rockley Wilson had mixed reaction: "We shall win the Ashes… but we may well lose a Dominion."
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When in Australia, he saw RAAF fighter planes above the newly built Sydney Harbour Bridge and quipped "I wish they were Japs and I wish they’d bomb that bridge into the harbour."

Hatred. There cannot be another word for it.

The press asked for the XI for the first tour match.
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Jardine snapped back: "We didn’t come here to provide scoops for yours or any other bally paper. Tell Sydney and Melbourne they can damn well wait."

Thereafter he would make it a habit on the tour to name the XIs only at the last moment throughout the tour.
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Oh, and he hated Bradman, he hated the fact that he had helped Australia win back The Ashes.

Had there been no Bradman there would certainly have been no bodyline.

He ordered his teammates to refer to Bradman – not as Don, definitely not as Bradman, but "the little bastard".
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To annoy the spectators, he donned a multicoloured ("maroon, buff, and dark blue") Harlequin cap throughout the tour.

He batted (perennially) at a snail-like pace, which irked them even more.

But you do not get away by annoying the Australian crowds.
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They demanded him not being offered a drink during the drinks break ("don't give him a drink, let the bastard die of thirst").

They demanded he be bounced at.

They barracked him when he tried to nurse his bruises on the field after being hit.

So he left them unattended.
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But that is about Jardine and Australians. Our story involves the infamous Adelaide Test.

We know this part of the story.

Jardine opened with Larwood and Allen.

Bradman arrived after Fingleton was caught-behind off Allen for a duck.
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The fifth ball of Larwood’s second over missed Woodfull’s head by a whisker.

The next hit him just over his heart.

Woodfull dropped his bat and doubled over in pain.

The anxious English fielders gathered around him.

Allen rushed to fetch a glass of water.
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But Jardine yelled – in a voice audible enough for both Woodfull and Bradman – "well bowled, Harold!"

It was important that Larwood did not feel guilty. War does not encourage such weakness.

When play resumed, Allen bowled the next over entirely to Bradman.
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And now, when it was Larwood’s turn to bowl, the field adjusted to Bodyline positions – for the first time in Test cricket.

He would bowl to Woodfull.

Perhaps nothing epitomises Jardine more than the event.

We know what happened that evening.
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Decades later, Woodfull's words would be rechoed by Kumble.

Play got underway as usual next day.

On 218/7, Larwood bowled one short.

Oldfield, aiming to cut, changed his stroke to a pull at the last moment.

The ball took the top edge and hit him on the temple.
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And Oldfield dropped his bat and staggered towards point, clutching his head.

It was evident that this was no ordinary blow. Everyone rushed towards Oldfield.

And amidst all this, Oldfield assured Larwood in no uncertain terms: "It wasn't your fault, Harold."
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And the mounted policemen, summoned especially for the day, turned around to face the crowd.

Later, at Brisbane, with the urn at stake, Paynter had gone down after Day 1.

He ran a temperature of 102°F.

Brisbane General Hospital diagnosed tonsillitis.
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The doctors advised Paynter against taking further part in the match. Jardine was not amused.

When he returned from hospital, he told manager Plum Warner that Paynter must bat: "What about those fellows who marched to Kandahar with fever on them?"

It was war, nothing less.
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And hence Jardine convinced Paynter to escape the hospital. The Ashes was won.

There was more. Larwood fractured his left foot in the dead-rubber Test.

But he was not allowed to leave the ground till Bradman was around to ensure the psychological pressure was never let go.
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And yet, despite the undoubtable hatred towards an entire nation, Jardine kept writing to Ruth Oldfield, wife of Bert, asking for updates and wishing her husband recovery.

He sent dolls to their daughters.
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If this sounds normal, remember that the man hated the Australians to the core and went to any lengths to make his feelings known.

He wanted the nation to be bombed.

No, it was uncharacteristic.

One wonders if anyone outside his family understood Jardine at all.