Thread by @hilarymarsh

#grammarfun: • An Oxford comma walks into a bar where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.
• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
/1

• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
/2

• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
• A question mark walks into a bar?
/3

• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
/4

• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
• A synonym strolls into a tavern.
/5

• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, sharp as a tack.
• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
/6

• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
/7

• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
• A dyslexic walks into a bra.
/8

• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
/9

• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.
/10
Hope this gave you some smiles!
/end

I didn't write this! the author is @DavidNeedle