Thread by @matthwatson

this banana is too straight

bruh... this banana bout to make me do something ima regret...

alright it broke off and it’s stuck, I’m trying to get it out but it just gets mushy, seriously freaking out

got maybe 20% out (??), the rest is going to have to wait until morning :(

legit wasn't trying to do anything sexual was just pranking myself and it went wrong. not sure if I can go to sleep, I dont want to call for help but driving to the hospital is going to hurt and im embarrassed. was just joshing myself

ok it really hurts now, i tried to get it out but i made it worse and the pain is really bad. real talk when do I call 911? im scared they will judge me and think im a weirdo. but i was really just kidding when i did it and it was a prank but they might not believe me?

I called 911 but I think they sent the police instead of an ambulance and im not sure what to do

speaking with the officers now, tried to explain but they're being weird? they want to search my room. is that legal?

i said no i need medical help but they went in my room and now they just said they found something called 'pcp' in my room???? i have no clue what that even is i have never heard of it. but now they look serious and theyre saying i have to put my phone down. wtf

ok bye guys they are taking my phone

Hey guys, this is Sam (Matt's older sister). Earlier tonight Matt was arrested for possession of PCP and marijuana. He is currently in booking and I am in correspondence with the police. I'm getting a flight to LA tomorrow morning. Will update as soon as we get more info.

- Sam

Sam again. Just got off the phone with the LAPD and they told me Matt has gone into septic shock. He has been rushed to the hospital. They're saying he might have a 'foreign object inserted into his rectum', causing this. Again, will update as more info comes. Please pray.

- Sam

Also, I (Sam) have an Etsy shop where I handmake pieces of art. Please go purchase some etsy.com/shop/SamWatson…

Matt is stable (they think)

Hey everyone. Great news. Matt has woken up and is stable. We talked and he was able to say a bit before passing out again. He said to go check out my Etsy store for some reason?

real shit my sister is going to be very mad at me tomorrow morning