I don't know who wants to hear this, but being single during this pandemic has been downright dreadful.
I'm not taking away from the seriousness of the pandemic. Please take it seriously, but by God has it been hard when you simply don't have anyone to share time with.
I'm not taking away from the seriousness of the pandemic. Please take it seriously, but by God has it been hard when you simply don't have anyone to share time with.
The national rules are so strongly geared towards couples and families, and really leaves single people in no man's land, fending for themselves.
No one is forming a bubble with a guy they met in a park that one time just so they can get to know each other.
No one is forming a bubble with a guy they met in a park that one time just so they can get to know each other.
Effectively I and probably others have been penalised for an entire year where it has been nigh impossible to start or develop any new relationships.
During the first few months it was ok. I told myself it was self-reflection time. Time to improve on myself.
During the first few months it was ok. I told myself it was self-reflection time. Time to improve on myself.
But month after month, it kept dragging on. There is only so much you can do on your own.
During summer, I managed a couple of socially distanced park dates, where despite the sunshine, we managed to get rained on. Meetings were awkward. Do we hug? Do we not? ...
During summer, I managed a couple of socially distanced park dates, where despite the sunshine, we managed to get rained on. Meetings were awkward. Do we hug? Do we not? ...
If you did hug, it was this awkward uncomfortable nervous pat where neither side knew if it was allowed and looked over your shoulder to see if you'd gotten away with it.
More often you'd meet and give each other a nod from 6 feet away and then start walking in a given direction
More often you'd meet and give each other a nod from 6 feet away and then start walking in a given direction
..like driving on the motorway in two separate lanes but at the same speed. Almost as if by happenstance that this occured at all.
Most often there wasn't anywhere to pick up a beverage (alcoholic or otherwise). I'm not a big drinker, but social lubrication when meeting...
Most often there wasn't anywhere to pick up a beverage (alcoholic or otherwise). I'm not a big drinker, but social lubrication when meeting...
...a stranger for the first time in an already awkward and unprecedented situation, goes a long way to breaking the ice.
Then there was the absolute absence of bathrooms. Almost as if the government assumed people who go to parks were a superior breed of human...
Then there was the absolute absence of bathrooms. Almost as if the government assumed people who go to parks were a superior breed of human...
...who had evolved superior mechanisms of bladder and bowel control.
In summer, you could still get by. There was still that opportunity to potentially meet someone. As the days shortened and the weather turned prospects of dating nose-dived.
In summer, you could still get by. There was still that opportunity to potentially meet someone. As the days shortened and the weather turned prospects of dating nose-dived.
Now, in the winter. Even if you're lucky enough to arrange for a date. The only thing to do is to go for a cold and almost always wet and blustery walk which makes the summertime pitfalls seem like...well...a walk in the park.
That's not to say I haven't tried video dating. But the pitfalls are the same, developing a connection and intimacy is awkward, and even after a few video dates with the same person, moving to real world is taxing. It is now such a laborious effort to meet someone in person...
...that many just give up before they've even begun. When you add this to the mix of what is already a dating scene where every contestant is disposable with a left or right swipe of one's finger, it makes for a disheartening story.
With Tier 4 announced, I've genuinely felt...
With Tier 4 announced, I've genuinely felt...
...despondent in a way I hadn't felt before. There is no end in sight. It's been a year of 'trying to make the best of it'...but it has been godawful.
The suspicion with which we now view strangers, potential dates or otherwise, is a behavioural paradigm shift that will have...
The suspicion with which we now view strangers, potential dates or otherwise, is a behavioural paradigm shift that will have...
...lasting repercussions. Meeting new people...dating...has changed.
I should caveat that I am fortunate and grateful to still have a job, and also doing my bit to help the NHS through the pandemic. I am aware there are many much less fortunate than me.
I should caveat that I am fortunate and grateful to still have a job, and also doing my bit to help the NHS through the pandemic. I am aware there are many much less fortunate than me.
While professionally my life has continued progressing (and I know that isn't the case for so many people), on a personal level this year has been one of stagnation and even regression as the already slim chances of developing a connection become vanishingly more thin.
So yeah. I don't really have a point other than it has been an absolute waste of a year on a personal level.
Not only has it been impossible to date, it was also nearly impossible to meet friends who would normally have been a support during this time. Social isolation is real.
Not only has it been impossible to date, it was also nearly impossible to meet friends who would normally have been a support during this time. Social isolation is real.
If anyone feels the same, or has sage words of wisdom, or a story to tell of their own singledom turmoil, I am here for it.
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