🔥My @puddingviz#2020Wrapped AI ROAST!!! #FuckSkynet🖕
> Your spotify was neverland-ranch-walmart-hawaiian-shirt-nobody-puts-baby-in-a-corner bad.
> Thank your obsessions with Michael Jackson, mellow gold, and (I've Had) The Time of My Life - From "Dirty Dancing" Soundtrack...
...for that.
> Based on your listening habits, I can also tell you your spotify was...
> motherfucking-starboy bad
> movie-soundtrack bad
> women-of-a-certain-age bad
> paisley-park bad
> manic-pixie-dream-girl bad
> Here's what else is going on in your aural trash fire:..
...
You listen to these tracks too much:
People So Stupid by Tom MacDonald
Let It Rain by Tom MacDonald
Everybody Hates Me by Tom MacDonald
Sober by Tom MacDonald
Lit by Tom MacDonald
You stan these artists to an uncomfortable extent:
Michael Jackson
Gunship
Tom MacDonald...
...Brad Fiedel
pierre XO
You are 6% basic. Glitch Black and March to the Grave? Where do you even find this shit?.
You're stuck in the early 2010s. You must have peaked right around Gunship's Dark All Day.
Analysis completed in 4.012 exhausting seconds.
I need to go...
...recalibrate my taste levels.
Shutting down.
(A.I. trained by Mike Lacher & Matt Daniels for The Pudding. Additional support from Omri Rolan, Kevin Litman-Navarro.)
"When you learn that Civil Trials used to be allowed to go before Criminal Trials, in Santa Barbara, California (since amended), you realize that the cards were already stacked against Michael Jackson right from the very beginning. A...
...pocket change settlement from the chart-smashing mega-hit Megastar's Insurance team was the only option, when the Chandlers weren't seeking any kind of meaningful justice.
If the charges were real, the Police would have been the first rational port of call (right before...
...quelling urges to kill). No parent in their right mind would react litigiously like they did in the face of such unspeakable horror.
This was an extortion scheme, plain and simple.
These heinous schemes sadly still persist to this very day. I just wish the press had the...