"Have you seen my Facebook post today? It is, as the kids say, fire."
"This is so boring. I'm glad I can scroll through Instagram to kill some time."
"Can't wait for this TikTok of Bill making a sandwich to go viral lol."
"Sure, here, upload that selfie of us & tag me, I'll follow you back."
"I keep reminding Bill to use his OWN Pinterest account to save all these vegan smoothie recipes. Why are they all pinned to my memes board?"
"And you can subscribe to my podcast on all major platforms because I haven't been banned from any of them. What would you even have to do for that to happen?"
"I think we should start selling merch on Shopify. There are people who would buy a cross-stitch pattern of this selfie, Meryl."
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