Folks out here really mad because a Black woman who worked damned hard for her position in life demands that you show the same respect to her as you do to White people you wouldn't dare address without their formal salutation.
Really?
Really?
https://twitter.com/ProfessorCrunk/status/1349012729936412676
Even when I write emails and letters to my closest friends, I still use 'Dear'. Because it is about respect and good manners. Especially when you don't know the person.
https://twitter.com/365DiversityLLC/status/1349021017453297664
Not everyone comes from a home with professionals who write formal communications. So it is understandable when a first-generation collegian errs in formal greeting.
But some folks out there, who know better, just don't want to use their home training.
But some folks out there, who know better, just don't want to use their home training.
https://twitter.com/ProfessorCrunk/status/1349017346116100099
I still get plenty of 'Dear Mr. Biddle' in correspondences. So this is not really so.
https://twitter.com/Wildlyunlikely/status/1349147660398309376
Someone is going to say something about this being classist. Problem is that the folks to whom you are speaking came from some pretty blue collar environments.
My Grandpa was a chef. He still wrote 'Dear in his letters.
My Grandpa was a chef. He still wrote 'Dear in his letters.
Others note that e-mails can be less formal. True, to a degree, often when you already know the colleague well or is a friend.
Of course, you just text your friends - unless you send them a letter or Christmas card. Then you use 'Dear'.
Of course, you just text your friends - unless you send them a letter or Christmas card. Then you use 'Dear'.
You definitely don't address your elder and teacher by their first name without including a "Mr.", "Mrs.", "Ms." or "Dr./Prof.". You don't know them like that.
In the Black community, it is always Mr. Joe and Dr. Vonn and Ms. Charlotte.
In the Black community, it is always Mr. Joe and Dr. Vonn and Ms. Charlotte.
https://twitter.com/xubeauty06/status/1349014165294297092
The lack of boundaries is a real problem.
https://twitter.com/Remarsh76/status/1349198743082569728
If the professors or other folks give you permission to address them informally, then that's fine. But that's the key: Permission.
I don't get to call you 'Cookie' if you don't want me to. Simple as that, really.
I don't get to call you 'Cookie' if you don't want me to. Simple as that, really.
https://twitter.com/wetdreamsangel/status/1349141710970908673
This applies to every relationship. Just because my best friend's mom calls him whatever name she calls him doesn't mean I get to do that.
Just because my father-in-law refers to my wife by a nickname doesn't mean I get to.
My son doesn't get to call my wife 'Honey'.
Just because my father-in-law refers to my wife by a nickname doesn't mean I get to.
My son doesn't get to call my wife 'Honey'.
Another issue White folks in particular miss is the matter of the White Supremacist framework that governs this nation. Black folks are almost always given less deference, even when they have worked twice as hard for the same credentials and success.
https://twitter.com/wetdreamsangel/status/1349412943151079424
Particularly for Black academics, who already struggle to gain their doctorates, attain tenure, publish their (often-pathbreaking) work, and survive in higher ed landscapes hostile to their existence, properly addressing them is a real big deal.
White folks who call this demand for permission (and respect) 'elitist' don't think about any of this. But then, they don't have to. They are White, and if they earned similar credentials, their demands for permission and respect would be granted outright.
So for Black folks, as well as for Latino and Indigenous folks, yes, the failure to ask permission for informality and show respect is 'egregious'. It really is.
By the way: This matter is also similar to the uproar that happened a few weeks ago when White conservative men like Joseph Epstein showed disrespect to Dr. Jill Biden by arguing that she shouldn't be called doctor (her proper title) and denigrating her doctoral dissertation.
It is part of the same issue of how marginalized communities are treated by White folks (and even other non-White folks) in professional spaces.
Black and Brown folks are treated as if they aren't worthy of deference and request for permission granted by right to White folks.
Black and Brown folks are treated as if they aren't worthy of deference and request for permission granted by right to White folks.
There isn't a direct connection between the world becoming more informal and Black folks gaining credentials in professional spaces. But the move towards one does empower White folks to continue denigration of Black folks doing the latter.
https://twitter.com/d2harris/status/1349409031153197058
Informality doesn't mean that boundaries and permission disappears. If anything, because we have become more informal in some ways, folks must seek more permission to do so when it comes to folk they don't know.
This is why you ask and seek permission. Not everyone wants such informality, especially if they are marginalized folks in spaces that already treat them as secondary figures, and they are right to not grant you that permission.
https://twitter.com/wetdreamsangel/status/1349422124453269504
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