UCP’s ‘How to Bungle a Public Health Emergency’ handbook:
-never appear to have any sort of actual plan
-show up late for presentations and evade reporters’ questions
-threaten and frighten Albertans with dire predictions one day, then ease restrictions the next day 1/6
-never appear to have any sort of actual plan
-show up late for presentations and evade reporters’ questions
-threaten and frighten Albertans with dire predictions one day, then ease restrictions the next day 1/6
-Make rules without any data to back up your reasoning. Arbitrarily open or close businesses based on nothing. Refuse to supply data.
-Inconsistency is key. Things that are dangerous to do at home are NOT dangerous in a restaurant or in schools 2/6
-Inconsistency is key. Things that are dangerous to do at home are NOT dangerous in a restaurant or in schools 2/6
-If people refuse to follow your health restrictions, give them a stern talking to and say, “Come on, you guys.” You could also say you are ‘frustrated’ or ‘deeply concerned’.
-Do not enforce anything. If they persist in defying, drop the restrictions.
3/6
-Do not enforce anything. If they persist in defying, drop the restrictions.
3/6
-Be sure MLAs disregard and belittle health advice at every opportunity. They should mask-wearing and hand-washing often appear maskless, and question the accuracy of covid tests. 4/6
-Make sure Albertans know that all these restrictions are for them, not you. You need beach vacations and catered banquet lunches. The peasants do not.
-Disappear for days or weeks at a time at critical moments 5/6
-Disappear for days or weeks at a time at critical moments 5/6
-Ignore doctors pleading with you to do more to prevent a coming wave of hospitalizations and deaths
-At all times, blame the federal government for everything you have done wrong. 6/6
-At all times, blame the federal government for everything you have done wrong. 6/6
I thought of so many other things since writing the above!
-Begin by calling covid an ‘influenza’ and emphasize that it is only dangerous to people who have outlived their life expectancy. The average age of those who died was > than Alberta life expectancy. They’re disposable.
-Begin by calling covid an ‘influenza’ and emphasize that it is only dangerous to people who have outlived their life expectancy. The average age of those who died was > than Alberta life expectancy. They’re disposable.
-The minister responsible for about 20% of Alberta’s population (students and school staff) should never set foot inside one of the affected places during the pandemic. Insist that it there is a ‘robust plan’ to protect them, and don’t change it.
-As part of the robust plan, give a lucrative supply contract to a generous UCP donor
-When finally forced to close schools, insist that it’s just ‘operational’ and not because 1000s have been sick or quarantined.
-When finally forced to close schools, insist that it’s just ‘operational’ and not because 1000s have been sick or quarantined.
-Remember, if you don’t admit the problem is there, it’s not there!
-Also insist that ‘numbers show’ people aren’t catching covid at school, even though there is no contact tracing for weeks.
-Also insist that ‘numbers show’ people aren’t catching covid at school, even though there is no contact tracing for weeks.
-Actually, this is a great all around strategy for stats! Say that you don’t know the numbers, one thing you do know is that the numbers do not show what you don’t want them to show. For sure.
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