Thread by @cicerfics

Switching gears for a minute:

I am really very attached to A/B/O-verse stories where wangxian get together during the Cloud Recesses years.

I haven't written one (yet?) but I have so many ideas for how I want it to go.

Maybe, in this setting, seeing that porn is simply Too Much for poor LWJ.

Maybe it's right before or after his heat, and he's just too keyed up to handle it like a Respectable Young Master.

So when WWX puts a naughty drawing right in front of him, he can't cope.

He pounces on WWX and plants a kiss on him.

...Now, I think he'd regain his self control immediately. They'd spend some time staring at each other like 😳😳😳

But maybe it's a lightbulb moment for WWX, too.

Aha! He wants this! He's teasing LWJ because he wants to make out with him! And LWJ wants to make out with him, too!

LWJ probably tries to flee the library in humiliation and guilt. But WWX chases after him!

If LWJ wants to kiss him, that's just fine! ;) WWX wants to kiss, too. ;)

In fact, he needs more kisses. ;)

LWJ just stole his first kiss, and WWX didn't even have time to enjoy it! ;) WWX didn't have a chance to kiss back! ;) LWJ owes him another try! ;)

Long story short, they wind up making out furiously behind some bushes.

LWJ, of course, decides that this means the two of them are Officially Courting.

And he takes it very seriously. 💪

There are important Lan courtship rituals that must be performed.

The exchange of specific gifts. Drinking a certain type of tea together. Visiting the ancestral shrines and presenting themselves before their ancestors.

LWJ insists on doing ALL of these rituals.

WWX is a bit caught off guard at first. He mostly thought they'd just be making out!

He wasn't exactly thinking about courtship-with-a-view-to-marriage.

But he's...not opposed! Not at all!

Lan Zhan is his equal, his match! Lan Zhan is smart and talented and super cool! Lan Zhan is a REALLY GREAT KISSER and WWX wants to keep those kisses coming!

Being married to Lan Zhan wouldn't be a bad thing AT ALL.

So they are Secretly Courting, and very happy about it.

They both enjoy having a Secret Romance. They enjoy being Sneaky about their trysts.

...They are not actually that sneaky, of course. LXC knows. JYL and JC know. NHS DEFINITELY knows.

But everyone else is blissfully ignorant!

LXC and JYL think this Secret Romance is extremely cute. They've already had a meeting to plan the wedding.

They're thinking a summer wedding, four years from now. The boys will be 20/21 then. That's a perfect time for marriage!

NHS is eating popcorn and THOROUGHLY enjoying the show.

Meanwhile, JC is having a nervous breakdown. He's convinced that WWX is going to disgrace the family and offend the Lans.

But WWX manages to convinced his brother that he's Serious About Lan Zhan.

Because he is! In fact, he's even more fascinated with Lan Zhan, now that they're Courting!

LWJ completely lets his guard down around WWX. He's sweet, romantic, funny.

He's devastatingly earnest about this courtship, and determined to be a Good Future Husband.

LWJ: I will ask Lady Jiang to teach me to make your favorite soup, so I can make it for Wei Ying when we're married.

WWX:

So they're in love, and happy!

...And they're horny.

So, so horny.

They're very much aware that they need to Wait Till The Wedding Night. And they're sure they can manage that.

But making out feels great, so they do a lot of it. And then their hands start wandering.

That's okay, because everyone's virginity is still intact! Groping and heavy petting don't count!

But it's not enough.

So they move on to handjobs and blowjobs. That's still okay. They're still Technically Virgins, so it's fine.

But it's not enough.

And finally they day arrives.

They're just SO HORNY, they can't help themselves any longer.

WWX is like, "What if...I put it in...just a little bit? 😳 And then pull out? That wouldn't count, right? We'd still definitely be virgins!"

LWJ is too horny to even care about that kind of convoluted nonsense logic.

He says yes.

Yes, just put it in just a little bit, and then pull out. No, Wei Ying, of course that doesn't count as sex. Pinky swear.

...Does WWX manage to pull out?

Maybe it works that time!

But they don't get any less horny, so they keep pushing the envelope.

Each time, they let themselves go a little bit longer without pulling out. And they get sloppier about where WWX's cum ends up.

At first, WWX finishes into a hankie or something. Then he finishes on LWJ's stomach. Then on LWJ's thighs.

And eventually, there are a few times where he doesn't manage to pull out at all.

(Dear God, I hope there are no underage kiddos reading this. If you're underage, please unfollow ASAP. But before you go, let me say this:

THE PULL-OUT METHOD IS NOT A RELIABLE FORM OF CONTRACEPTION. WANGXIAN ARE ABOUT TO FIND this OUT.)

(DO NOT USE THIS METHOD TO PREVENT PREGNANCY. THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT.)

Anyway, I'm sure they don't realize anything is amiss at first. They're horny and in love, and everything is rosy in the garden.

They are not sure how they're going to talk their families into an official betrothal. LQR will be opposed, that's for sure.

YZY will also be opposed, if the couple plans to split their time between CR and LP.

She'd probably jump at the chance to have WWX marry into CR. But that's not the route wangxian want to take!

So they have to think of a way to convinced their families that:

A) They should be allowed to get married

and

B) They should be allowed to divide their time between two sects

A tall order! This will take a lot of maneuvering and planning. They are thinking very hard about how best to achieve this.

Thinky thinky thinky.

They are so busy thinking and planning, it takes a while for LWJ to realize that he's.

You know.

Late.

(Have to take a break for a bit. I will be back to yell more about this later. That is both a threat and a promise. 😘)

I'm back! I just had Chinese food for dinner, and my fortune cookie said, "People find it difficult to resist your persuasive manner."

I choose to believe this means that other people will write more omega!LWJ, if I just keep threadficcing.

I am MANIFESTING more omega!LWJ into this world. 🙌

Please don't attempt to convince me that this isn't how it works. MY FORTUNE COOKIE HAS SPOKEN.

Anyway! We're back in A/B/O-verse and these are intersex omegas we're dealing with.

So they have vulvas and uteruses and periods. All that fun stuff.

LWJ's cycle is actually not all that regular. This Annoys him, because he likes things to be well-scheduled and orderly.

His uterus is very inconsiderate! It does not abide by a timetable!

The point is, it takes him a while to figure out that he's Late. He's preoccupied with other things, and he assumes that his period will show up eventually. It always has, in the past.

But this time, it doesn't.

After a while, LWJ is like, "Waaaaait a minute."

He checks the date and counts backward on his fingers.

His period was due three whole weeks ago.

...Well. Maybe it's just.

Particularly late this time?

He's been late before! Not this late, but surely there's no need to panic. After all, he and Wei Ying have been careful.

Kind of.

Mostly.

Except for two or three times when they definitely weren't.

LWJ tries counting backward again, to figure out where he was in his cycle during the times they were Less Than Careful.

And.

Perhaps.

There is some cause for concern.

But he tries not to worry right away. He waits, and waits.

Three weeks late.

Four weeks late.

Then he misses an entire second period, and that's when he starts sweating.

Eventually, he finds a quiet moment to visit his brother. As they're drinking tea together, LWJ says, "Brother. I have a hypothetical question."

LXC is immediately Suspicious.

His little brother does not ask hypothetical questions. Ever. He likes concrete facts and information that has an immediate purpose.

If he asks a question, there is a Reason. LWJ has something specific in mind.

But LXC plays it very cool.

"Wangji. Please ask." He smiles at his brother very gently.

"How does one tell..." Lan Wangji begins.

Then he stops.

He is silent for a very long time.

The sirens in LXC's mind screech louder.

After an extended pause, he speaks.

"Wangji. If you have a question, you must ask it. Our sect rules say that there is no shame in ignorance. There is only shame in failing to correct ignorance through proper study."

LWJ nods. He nerves himself up, and he manages to speak.

"I have questions. About the...reproductive process."

LXC smiles.

Then he takes a very long sip of tea.

"I suppose you're at that age, aren't you? Do you have question because you're starting to think about marriage?"

LWJ doesn't answer. He is very studiously avoiding eye contact.

LXC hums.

"There are books you can read. They explain what happens between married couples. I'll give you permission to retrieve those books from the inner library."

LWJ nods grimly.

He opens his mouth. He almost says what he needs to say. But then, he shuts his mouth and politely takes his leave.

Research first. Then he'll know for SURE what's going on.

Timeskip time! Research montage! Picture LWJ scurrying around the library, frantically reading different books, as the 'Benny Hill' theme plays!

Anyway, he quickly come to the uncomfortable conclusion. The books say that if you're sexually active with a penis-owner and your period stops, you're almost definitely pregnant.

Well.

Crap.

He stews on that for a day or two. WWX notices that he seems preoccupied, but LWJ can't bring himself to talk about it.

He should, of course. He should tell Wei Ying right away. This is very much Wei Ying's concern. But he's afraid that Wei Ying will be angry or disappointed.

He's afraid that his family will be angry and disappointed, too. But at least his brother is older, and he knows more about these sort of things. He'll help LWJ figure out what to do next.

So LWJ steels himself and marches back to the Hanshi.

LXC serves him more tea, and waits. His little brother obviously has something on his mind.

He's half-expecting LWJ to announce that he wants a formal betrothal with WWX.

LXC is armed and ready. He has a thirty-slide PowerPoint presentation prepared, extolling the benefits of this match. If this marriage is what Wangji wants, he WILL make Uncle agree.

But then LWJ opens his mouth and says, "Brother. I think I might be..."

He doesn't finish that sentence. But he does gesture to his stomach. There is not much room for misinterpretation with that gesture.

The teacup shatters in LXC's hand.

LWJ scrambles to get a towel and clean up the hot tea, while LXC's brain spends a solid 15 seconds rebooting.

Whatever he was expecting, it was NOT THIS.

His little brother is still a BABY, after all. LXC genuinely tries not to think of him as being six years old. But in his mind, A-Zhan is still very, very small.

Old enough to be courting, maybe. Old enough to hold hands in the garden and sneak a few chaste kisses.

Not old enough for THIS. Not old enough that LXC had to be worried about PREGNANCY.

But all once, LXC feels extremely foolish not to have foreseen this. A-Zhan was always very passionate and unrestrained in his love. He never did anything by halves.

And A-Zhan is not six years old. He's almost seventeen, and he's old enough to want to be intimate with the man he loves.

LXC should have realized this. He should have prepared his brother. He definitely should have kept a closer eye on the situation.

He is a fool, and a terrible older brother.

He's continuing to be a terrible brother, too. Because he's let the silence stretch out, and now A-Zhan looks distraught and ashamed. He must think that LXC is angry, disgusted, disappointed in him.

LXC doesn't know what else to do, so he just pulls his brother into his arms and hugs him.

And then, very shakily, he says, "I see."

"I didn't realize..."

LXC takes a very long, very slow breath.

"I knew that you and Young Master Wei had grown close. But I thought you were still in the early stages of courting."

His brother ducks his head, avoiding LXC's eyes.

LXC does not like that AT ALL.

A-Zhan might be embarrassed that he let his passions run away with him. That would be fine. LXC can forgive that, overlook it. If it was mutual passion, then it's fine.

But maybe A-Zhan is ashamed because Wei Wuxian has DONE something to him. Maybe he tricked A-Zhan, or forced him somehow.

LXC wouldn't have expected it of WWX. But he didn't expect anything about this situation, so can his judgment really be trusted?

"Wangji. Did he...take advantage of you?"

LWJ's head immediately snaps up.

He shakes his head furiously, and stammers out a very convoluted explanation.

LXC doesn't understand all of it. But the gist is fairly clear.

The love-affair was CONSIDERABLY more advanced than LXC realized. They already promised themselves to each other, already performed the betrothal rites. They have already been planning for their eventual marriage, and trying to think of ways to convince their families to agree.

Wangji seems quite certain of his own feelings, and WWX's. He very much wants to marry WWX.

And he knows, Wangji adds shamefacedly, that they were supposed to wait. They TRIED to wait, they tried to be very careful, but...

LXC sighs.

What can he say, really? The Lan sect emphasizes self-disciple, self-restrained. But they're only human.

There have been plenty of marriages in their sect where at least one of the parties was already pregnant. Wangji won't be the first to marry under such circumstances.

And he does have to marry. As soon as it can possibly be arranged. That much is very clear.

Wangji doesn't know how far along he is yet. He was too afraid to see a physician, it seems. But he's missed two cycles already.

LXC gets up and fetches a physician without further delay.

The Lan sect physicians are particularly good at keeping a blank countenance.

From the woman's expression, you'd think that she performs examinations on sixteen-year-old Second Young Master Lan, pregnant out of wedlock, every day of her life.

She doesn't even bat an eye. If she's shocked, she doesn't show it. But she confirms that yes, Wangji is pregnant. About two months along. The baby will arrive around the summer solstice.

She assures them both that Wangji is in good health, but she recommends certain herbs to ensure a healthy pregnancy. She'll have the herbs sent over to his chambers immediately, along with remedies for morning sickness. If he hasn't developed nausea yet, he probably will soon.

Then she gives LXC a highly significant look, and asks to speak with him outside.

LXC already knows what the physician intends to say.

She must report this, of course. A pregnancy, in a young unmarried disciple, must be reported to the elders at once. There are no exceptions, not even for someone like Wangji.

But he asks her to delay her report just one more day.

One day can't make any difference, and LXC would very much prefer to make the announcement himself.

The physician asks, very dryly, if she should be present during the announcement.

LXC admits that would probably be wise.

There isn't much she can say, beyond confirming the pregnancy. But her services will certainly be needed, once Uncle hears the news.

Then he marches back inside the Hanshi and sits beside his brother.

"Does Young Master Wei know?"

Wangji shakes his head.

LXC tries not to feel too pleased about that. It's selfish to be glad that his brother came to him first with this news. But he is glad, and he's touched.

Even so.

"Well. We have to tell him at once, then."

LXC gets up and summons a disciple. He asks them to find WWX and bring him to the Hanshi at once.

Wangji squirms and tries to delay this talk, but LXC stands firm.

WWX must know about this immediately. More critically, LXC must know exactly how things stand between them.

Either WWX loves Wangji and intends to take responsibility, or LXC will be digging a discreet grave in the back hills of Cloud Recesses tonight.

LXC needs to know if he will spend tomorrow evening planning a wedding, or writing to Sect Leader Jiang to inform him of the results of a tragic "training accident".

WWX shows up with surprising promptness. He seems confused to find both Wangji and LXC there, but he rallies quickly.

He sits, when LXC bids him to. He sneaks several looks at Wangji, and shifts closer to Wangji than is strictly proper.

LXC gives his brother a pointed look.

This is really the sort of news that ought to come from Wangji's mouth. But Wangji gives his brother a miserable, pleading look.

LXC sighs.

It's not the first time he's been asked to speak on his brother's behalf. But it may be the last. He supposes that WWX will be taking over that duty now.

If this is the last time LXC utters words his brother doesn't want to speak, then he intends to make the most of it.

"Young Master Wei," he says crisply. "It would appear that my younger brother is pregnant."

WWX blinks neutrally.

He has not absorbed the words. LXC can see that at once. WWX just blinks for a while, as if he doesn't quite understand.

LXC can see the exact moment the news sinks in.

WWX's eyes become enormous.

He swings his head around to stare at Wangji, who is determined to avoid eye contact.

WWX's mouth opens and closes like a fish.

"Lan Zhan," he chokes out.

He reaches out for Wangji. Then he freezes, and his eyes swivel back to LXC.

WWX takes on a rather hunted expression. He looks as if he half-expects LXC to draw his sword and advance menacingly.

LXC is rather pleased to see that kind of fear in WWX's eyes. It makes the next part easier.

"I was not aware," he says, with painstaking slowness, "that you and my brother had become so close."

WWX is already kneeling at the table. But evidently, he decides THAT sort of kneeling isn't enough.

He scurries around the table, and hastens to kneel properly. Then he gives the same frenzied, incoherent response that Wangji provided earlier.

They have already promised themselves to each other, WWX says. They want to get married, and they were only waiting for the right moment to convince their families. They should have done things properly, of course.

WWX's face grows very red, when he mentions that.

He KNOWS they should have done things properly. He knows they should have...waited.

He doesn't want LXC to think the Jiangs didn't raise him properly, didn't teach him how to behave during a courtship. WWX knew better, he swears that he knew better. He doesn't have any excuse.

He just...likes Lan Zhan very much.

And he told himself it was all right, because they were going to get married anyway. So he just...got careless.

But (he adds this bit as he kowtows repeatedly at LXC's feet) he will definitely take responsibility!

He will take so much responsibility! No one will ever take more responsibility than Wei Wuxian! He will go down in the history books as the man who took the MOST responsibility, out of every cultivator who ever lived!

Responsibility will be taken!

He only hopes (he add THIS bit as he peers up at LXC's face) that he will be ALLOWED to take responsibility?

Will LXC let him take this on? All the responsibility that WWX VERY MUCH wants to take?

It would be very indecorous to laugh.

WWX is terribly in earnest, and Wangji is obviously very moved by this display.

And of course, this is exactly what LXC wanted to hear. He wanted to know that WWX was dedicated to Wangji, and planned to marry him.

With heroic effort, LXC controls his expression. He motions for WWX to rise and return to his seat. He pours out another round of tea, and pretends that he doesn't see WWX clutching Wangji's hand under the table.

Then he says, "Well. That's settled, then."

He explains that he will have to share the news with Uncle and the elders tomorrow. They will write to Sect Leader Jiang, and try to arrange a hasty marriage.

WWX turns rather pale at that.

"For my part," LXC adds serenely, "I have no objection to the match."

He walks around the garden and lets them have a few moments alone after that.

He shouldn't, of course. Under no circumstances should he leave his brother alone with his fiancé. But chaperoning them would be absurd NOW. It's far too late for that.

So LXC gives them a generous quarter of an hour to talk. Then he returns to the Hanshi and shoos WWX away.

It's nearly haishi, he points out. They must return to their own rooms. He trusts that nobody wants to be caught out after curfew.

It takes him some effort to pry WWX away from Wangji's side. But LXC doesn't mind that, not really. If anything, he's relieved.

He's relieved, too, when he sees how happy Wangji looks.

But after WWX is gone, Wangji's face clouds over.

"I have...caused trouble for Brother," he murmurs. "I apologize for my reckless conduct."

He tries to bow properly, deeply, the way WWX had during his absurd speech about responsibility. But LXC won't allow that.

LXC tugs his brother out of the bow.

"Wangji," he says softly.

He can't lie. Wangji certainly was reckless, and he has caused some trouble. LXC is not looking forward to the conversation with Uncle tomorrow, or the letter he must write to Sect Leader Jiang.

But he would endure a thousand times worse on his little brother's behalf. Nothing is too troublesome, not if it will help Wangji find happiness.

He can't make the words come. His throat closes up when he tries. He embraces Wangji instead, and then sends him off to bed.

Then, when he's certain that he's alone in the Hanshi, he finally give up on decorum. He laughs so hard he starts to cry.

...I like how I tried to write a dumb smutty omega!LWJ threadfic and it just became the Twin Jades Feelings Hour.

Taking a break now! More of this later on, or maybe tomorrow! ✌️

...Ah, crap. I need to worldbuild.

Okay, hang on for a second here.

I don't remember how long the Cloud Recesses lectures are supposed to last, or when they start. I'm pretty sure this detail is inconsistent across various adaptations, too.

So, we're just gonna say it starts in June and ends in January.

WWX arrived in June. LWJ got knocked up in September. We are now in November, and LWJ is two months along.

WWX just turned 17. LWJ will be turning 17 in a couple more months.

That is my final answer.

Also, you know what? I want to get WRH out of the way, because I don't want to deal with that plotline.

This is an "everything is beautiful and nothing hurts" AU. Because I said so.

So we're just gonna say that when WRH was about 19, he was already sending off that "I am going to cause problems on purpose" energy.

The Dafan Wens didn't like that. So they assassinated him.

Let's say it was Granny Wen. Let's say she used her physician skills to bump him off.

I want that for her, so let's say that's what happened.

The Dafan Wen branch took over leadership of the main sect. WRH died before he had any kids, so it was easy.

Granny Wen and her husband ruled for a while. Then her husband died, and she stepped down in favor of her son.

That dude (WQ and WN's uncle) is now Sect Leader Wen. We'll say he's the Chief Cultivator, too.

He doesn't have any kids, so WQ is next in line to be Sect Leader Wen.

She and her brother are currently at Cloud Recesses, studying along with all the other sect heirs. There is no bad blood between the Wens and the other sects.

Where is the Yin Iron, you ask?

I don't care, and I encourage you not to care either.

Anyway: beyond the whole Wen-sect-changeup, this AU takes a sharp left turn around CQL episode 5.

No Waterborne Abyss. No drinking-and-getting-punished. No Cold Pond Cave with Lan Yi.

Just wangxian being super horny and in love.

Meanwhile, all the other disciples are staring at them in the classrooms, like

(LWJ still has his bunnies, of course. We'll rip off MDZS canon and say that WWX gave them to him this time. They were an Official Courting Gift, and LWJ was very happy.)

Glad we got that cleared up!

Also, it occurs to me that (since this is an A/B/O fic) I should mention everybody's designations.

I'm lazy, so I'm just gonna steal my own notes from 'so full of love, i could barely eat'.

Self-plagiarizing. Gotta love it.

(Note: I do not guarantee that all these people will show up in the story! These are just worldbuilding details!)

Alphas/qianyuans:

Wei Wuxian
Jiang Cheng
Jiang Fengmian
Jin Guangshan
Qingheng-Jun
Cangse Sanren
Mianmian
Nie Mingjue
Wen Ruohan (deceased)
Song Lan
Xue Yang
Baoshan Sanren

Betas/zhongyongs:

Jiang Yanli
Jin Zixuan
Jin Zixun
Jin Guangyao
Lan Xichen
Lan Qiren
Wei Changze
Mama Lan
Madam Jin
Mo Xuanyu
Nie Huaisang
Wen Ning
Wen Qing
Su She

Omegas/kunzes:

Lan Wangji
Lan Yi
Qin Su
Granny Wen
Xiao Xingchen
Yu Ziyuan

We'll just say that omega/kunzes are slightly under-represented among the cultivated population. Rare, but by no means unheard of.

I'll probably use the qianyuan/zhongyong/kunze phrasing from here on, just for the sake of ~immersion~.

Additional worldbuilding details I made up while writing 'so full of love, i could barely eat':

There's a stereotype in this setting that qianyuans and kunzes are superior cultivators. There is an idea that zhongyongs are more apt to be "mundanes".

Sect leaders are usually qianyuans and kunzes. People think zhongyongs don't have as much potential as cultivators.

Is it true? Not really! But it's as true as any other stereotype. In other words, it's true just often enough that people accept it as fact.

This is not relevant to the story. I am just yelling worldbuilding details into the void, because if I went to the trouble of making them up, I'm darn well gonna share them.

Okay, back to the storyline!

So LXC has his little mental breakdown.

Then he calms himself down and he goes to bed, mentally drafting baby names.

LWJ happily trots off to bed, too.

He knows that things are going to get difficult soon. But his brother and Wei Ying took the news very well. They weren't angry or disappointed with him.

His brother was very kind, and Wei Ying seemed genuinely happy with the news.

They had a nice little snuggle in the Hanshi, after LXC left them alone. Wei Ying cried and touched LWJ's stomach with gentle, reverent hands. He told LWJ he loved him.

It's very hard for LWJ to be upset under those circumstances! So goes straight to bed and dreams peacefully.

Meanwhile, where is Wei Ying?

Why, he is POWER-WALKING to the rooms he shares with JC and desperately hoping that NHS will be there.

Why is he power-walking? Because he doesn't want to be caught out after curfew, or caught running in Cloud Recesses.

LQR is already going to murder him once he finds out about the baby. There is no need to make the murder extra grisly by heaping on additional rule-breaking.

And he's really hoping NHS will be there because WWX only wants to deliver this news once.

Besides, if there's a witness, maybe JC won't strangle him?

Wei Ying decides that's probably a vain hope. But he pushes onward. He flings open the doors, darts inside, and slams the door shut behind him.

Then he runs over to his bed and swan-dives into it. He hides his face in the pillow.

JC and NHS are, indeed, waiting for him! They are baffled by this strange entrance.

But JC just huffs and turns away.

He refuses to ask what's wrong. After all, WWX has been especially dramatic since he started running around with LWJ.

Probably the two LOVEBIRDS had some small, insignificant tiff. Now WWX is throwing a tantrum, rather than handling the problem like a grown man. 😒

JC will not lower himself by asking questions about such foolish things!

(He is still very salty that WWX had the AUDACITY to fall in love and abandon his own brother. He refuses to Take An Interest in this romance.)

But NHS will lower himself to take an interest!

He runs over to the bed and pokes WWX repeatedly with his fan. He wants to know if the lovebirds have, in fact, argued.

If they have, he wants 100% of the information on this new drama.

The Wangxian Love Affair has been surprisingly dull so far! They've just been doing a lot of staring into each other's eyes, then sighing blissfully.

It's not that NHS isn't happy for them. But he prefers some SPICE to his romance stories. He would like a nice dramatic fight or breakup-followed-up-a-reconciliation.

NHS:

So he keep poking WWX with his fan.

Finally, WWX sits up. His hair is disheveled, and his face is very red. He refuses to meet NHS's eyes.

...Oho. NHS smells DRAMA.

He rushes to get his snacks and pour himself a glass of liquor.

Gotta get comfy. Curtain's going up.

"The fuck is wrong with you?" JC asks.

He's just noticed WWX's flushed, disheveled state.

WWX avoids his eyes, too.

"Uh. Okay. I have something to tell you, and you need to promise you won't get mad!"

WWX sidles over to the table where the other two are sitting. Then he tries to sidle behind NHS.

NHS immediately changes seats.

He knows when someone is trying to use another person as a human shield. He isn't falling for THAT trick!

JC's eyes immediately narrow.

"What did you do now?" he demands.

WWX whines.

"Why do you immediately assume that I did something! Why does everyone ALWAYS assume that I did something!"

He's silent for a moment, wriggling in his seat.

The other two continue to stare at him. Slowly, WWX wilts.

"...Okay, yes. I did something."

NHS chews his peanuts furiously.

"So you know how Lan Zhan and I...we've been...well..."

WWX can't even string together a full sentence.

This is very promising, NHS decides. Anything that can leave WWX tongue-tied is Grade A High Octane Drama. He's so incredibly here for this.

"We're gonna get married, by the way!" WWX bursts out. "We're definitely gonna get married. We decided THAT a long time ago."

NHS nods obligingly. He figured that out already, of course. LWJ isn't the type of person to fool around. Besides, the two were obviously smitten.

But he's very interested to know why WWX needs to clarify that they have already decided they are 'definitely going to get married.'

A suspicious statement! Highly incriminating!

JC doesn't seem to agree. He's just muttering about impropriety, and how they haven't even bothered to ask anyone's permission.

JC's parents are supposed to arrange a marriage for WWX. LWJ's family is supposed to arrange a marriage for him.

They can't just DECIDE this on their own! If they want to get married, they're supposed to ask their families to fix it up!

"We're GOING to ask permission," WWX says mulishly. "Zewu-Jun is going to help us ask everyone's permission! He approves of the marriage. He told me so tonight."

NHS immediately perks up.

Highly suspicious! Highly incriminating! Also, a delightful morsel of gossip!

WWX is already in talks with LWJ's brother! NHS hadn't counted on THAT happening for at least a few more months.

He figured the official betrothal would happen after the lecture series ended and WWX went home.

But WWX has already started talking to LWJ's family!

Well, well, well. What have we here.

JC is still mumbling protests.

WWX still has to ask his parents' permission. They still have to handle things through the proper channels. If this is an Official Courtship (with the Second Jade of Lan, no less!) then they have to do things the right way.

But WWX isn't listening. He continues, very quietly, almost talking to himself.

"So, um. Anyway. Since Lan Zhan and I already decided we were going to get married, we figured it would be okay if we..."

He doesn't finish that thought. But really, he doesn't need to.

NHS:

JC swings around. He levels his brother with a long, hard look.

"If you WHAT?!"

WWX squirms. He toys with NHS' discarded peanut shells.

"...You know!"

JC lurches to his feet.

"No, I DON'T know. What the FUCK have you been doing with Lan Wangji?"

WWX shells a peanut and eats it.

NHS pushes a glass of liquor in his direction. He has a feeling that everyone will need a lot of liquor by the time this conversation is done.

JC flails his arms expressively.

"I thought you were just...walking through the gardens and staring into each other's stupid eyes! What have you been DOING with him?"

NHS would also very much like to know the answer to that! He waits with bated breath.

WWX knocks back the shot. He thumps the cup onto the table and takes a deep breath.

"In my defense," he says, "Lan Zhan kissed me first!"

JC hits him.

WWX ducks, and his shoulder takes most of the blow. So JC hits him again.

They aren't hard hits, not really designed to hurt. It's more of a slapfight than anything else.

NHS moves the liquor out of range and waits for the ruckus to die down.

"Jiang Cheng! It's true!"

WWX scurries around the table, but JC pursues him.

"He did! He kissed me first!" WWX pauses. "Then I kissed him second, and then we just...kept kissing."

NHS:

Unexpectedly bold of LWJ! But absolutely the best gossip that has come down the pike in months!

NHS is thrilled. He is updating his mental rolodex so he can write more accurate LWJ/WWX RPF in the future.

"He's a really good kisser!" WWX adds, somewhat dreamily.

JC asks the question that NHS has been DYING to ask himself.

"What else have you two done?!"

WWX stops looking dreamy and besotted. Now he looks SHIFTY. He starts toying with the peanut shells again.

"Some other stuff..."

NHS reaches into the stack of books behind him. He picks out the most graphic erotic novel he owns, and slaps it down in front of WWX.

"Show me."

WWX squawks, as if he didn't BEG NHS to share his books before.

But WWX hasn't asked for any books in ages! NHS should have known the truth then! It's all so clear now.

WWX is getting real-life experience with this stuff, and he didn't even bother to tell NHS!

"I'm not gonna SHOW you what we did!" WWX pushes the book across the table. "That's private!"

NHS tucks the book back where it came from. Then he leans in and lowers his voice.

"Have you gone ALL THE WAY?"

WWX flushes a deep pomegranate red, and NHS cackles.

Lan Wangji!

Sleeping with his boyfriend!

Having an illicit out-of-wedlock affair!

Who would have expected it! Even NHS couldn't have seen this plot-twist coming!

While NHS is busy laughing himself sick, JC is busy punching his brother in the head. Repeatedly.

"Jiang Cheng!" WWX wails.

JC continues punching. He is undeterred. His brother's pleas for mercy are meaningless.

"What the fuck!" he hollers. "Who raised you! Why are you such a degenerate!"

WWX tries to flee, but JC pursues him. Then spend some time chasing each other around the room, dodging over the furniture and toppling NHS' stack of books.

"You're out here DESPOILING people before you even marry them?" JC hollers. "What were you THINKING?!"

WWX tries to use NHS as a human shield again. NHS runs to the other side of the room, clutching his liquor bottle close to his chest.

"Did you even THINK about your reputation? Or HIS reputation?"

"We're going to get married!" WWX yells. "I keep telling you! If we were going to get married, then I didn't see why it was such a big deal. We were just...getting a head start, that's all!"

NHS approves of that logic. There's nothing wrong with bedding your betrothed. It's very common in the Nie sect, anyway. Even the most uptight elders tend to look the other way.

He has a feeling it's significantly less common among the Lans, though.

JC pauses his chase. He's out of breath, his face furious.

"Did Zewu-Jun find out about this? Is THAT why you were talking to him about marriage? Is he MAKING you marry Lan Wangji?"

Zewu-Jun would certainly have that right. If he found out that someone had deflowered his younger sibling, he had every right to demand a marriage. That sort of thing was common in the Nie sect, too.

But somehow, NHS doesn't think that's the whole story.

He sidles closer, listening.

"Nobody's making me marry Lan Zhan," WWX snaps.

He sounds very offended, as if he takes umbrage to the notion that marrying Lan Wangji would be a hardship.

It's very cute, NHS thinks.

"But, um. We talked. And he thinks we should get married. Like, as soon as possible."

NHS catches his breath.

He thinks he knows where this is going. He's had his suspicions for the last five minutes.

But he thought, No. No that would be too good.

It would be too much to hope for, really. A scandal THAT delightful doesn't simply tumble into one's lap.

NHS has been to Cloud Recesses twice before. The most scandalous thing that usually happens is that someone gets caught smuggling in a roast chicken from Caiyi Town.

Something like THIS would be absolutely unheard of. What are the chances that NHS would get to witness THIS sort of thing with his own two eyes?

But this is Wei Wuxian they're talking about. What ISN'T he capable of?

So maybe...maybe this is really happening.

JC looks like he's developing some suspicions too. He's gone very still, and he squints at WWX.

When he speaks, his voice is dangerously quiet.

"Why."

"Wei Wuxian! Why does Zewu-Jun think you need to marry his brother as soon as possible?"

WWX squirms. His face is getting red again.

NHS didn't even know it could do that. He didn't realize that WWX was capable of blushing.

But if this is happening...if this is what NHS THINKS...then WWX certainly has cause to blush.

JC chokes on his own saliva.

"Are you telling me..." He sucks in a deep breath, and lets it out in a hiss. "What the fuck. Are you telling me you KNOCKED UP Lan Wangji?"

WWX doesn't say no.

NHS lets out a small squeal. He can't help it, really. It's too good. It's just TOO GOOD.

JC remains terrifyingly still. But his voice slowly rises in both pitch and volume.

"Tell me that's not what you're saying. Wei Wuxian. TELL ME I got this wrong."

Wei Wuxian swallows. hard.

"It was an accident?" he says, meekly.

JC lunges directly for his throat.

WWX manages to dodge, almost. But JC's nails catch him along the collarbone, and leave behind red welts.

"Ow! Jiang Cheng!"

NHS watches, delighted. JC looks like he might kill WWX. It's awful, of course. But it's also the most exciting thing that's happened to NHS in months.

"Don't murder him!" NHS advises helpfully. "He has to live so he can provide for his child, you know."

JC doesn't listen. He has his hands around WWX's neck.

"The Jiang sect will provide for his child!" he yells.

He gives WWX a hard shake. WWX squeaks.

"I am going to push him off a CLIFF as punishment for his crimes! Then we'll pay the Lan sect restitution for this HIDEOUS OFFENSE, and we'll all move on with our lives! Without you!"

This last bit is addressed to WWX.

WWX manages to pry his brother's fingers loose. He staggers away, gasping for breath.

"Jiang Cheng," he pants. "That's mean! You can't murder someone once they have a baby, you know! It's against the law!"

JC sags like a puppet whose strings have been cut. His knees give out, and he sinks down at the table.

"No, it isn't," he mumbles.

NHS pushes a glass of liquor toward him, too. JC gulps it down.

Once the glass is empty, he wipes his mouth slowly with the back of his hand.

"Oh my fucking god," JC whispers. "You're serious. You really got Lan Wangji pregnant."

"It wasn't on purpose!" WWX insists.

JC seizes the nearest object - the peanut bag - and hurls it at WWX. Peanuts scatter everywhere.

"You were sleeping with him!" he yells. "You're a qianyuan! He's a kunze! What did you THINK was going to happen!"

NHS shakes his head sadly. It's really too bad WWX wasn't more forthcoming about his love affair.

The Nie sect is quite liberal about such matters. Besides, NHS has made it his business to know things.

He knows all about contraceptive teas. He could have gotten WWX the right herbs, if he'd only asked! NHS would have charged only a modest finder's fee for this favor!

"Well," WWX insists gamely, "we were trying to be careful. And we mostly were careful. Except for those times when we weren't."

NHS shakes his head and fans himself. JC buries his face in his hands.

"But it'll be okay!" WWX squeezes his brother's shoulder.

JC moans in reply.

"I promise! Lan Zhan and I will get married and raise our baby well. You'll be an uncle! Do you want to pick the courtesy name?"

"No!" JC struggles free of his brother's grasp. "I don't want to pick the courtesy name!"

NHS raises his hand.

"Can I pick it?"

WWX considers his proposal, but shakes his head.

"No," he decides. "Shijie should pick it. She's older, so she has seniority."

He pats JC's shoulders.

"Sorry! I retract my offer."

JC gives a long moan of pure despair.

"I cannot believe this." He muffles his voice in his hands. "Grandmaster Qiren is going to murder you. Mother is going to murder you. I don't even have to lift a finger. You're definitely going to be murdered over this!"

NHS winces.

Between Lan Qiren and Yu Ziyuan, it is not particularly likely that WWX will survive to see the child's birth.

They'll probably still have the wedding. It would be less disreputable for both clans than allowing Lan Wangji give birth out of wedlock.

But they'll dispose of WWX as soon as the marriage rites are complete. Lan Wangji will be a widower during his first week of marriage.

NHS snaps his fan shut.

He can't let that happen. WWX has provided him with the best entertainment in MONTHS. NHS has to do something to protect him.

"Don't worry!" he tells WWX cheerfully. "I'll help you find a way to apologize to both your families!"

WWX pounds his shoulders and declares that NHS is his only true friend.

JC ignores them both. He's pushed aside his glass, and he's drinking straight from the bottle.

"You are explaining this to A-Jie tomorrow," he says.

He looks a little green at the thought.

"Kneel down and beg her forgiveness. She didn't raise you like this! Grovel at her feet and tell her you're sorry for disgracing her!"

WWX is clearly uncomfortable at the idea of confessing his sins to his sister. But he promises that he will kneel in apology for as long as she wants.

It won't be long, NHS knows that. Like Zewu-Jun, Jiang Yanli will just want to arrange the wedding as quickly as possible.

JC finishes the first bottle and starts on a second. He drinks until he passes out.

NHS rolls him obligingly toward his bed. With JC out of the way, NHS is free to move on to more important matters.

NHS retrieves some paper and grinds fresh ink. Then he dips his brush and turns to WWX.

"I am going to need details about this love affair." He poises his brush over the paper. "I am going to need COPIOUS details."

NHS knows an erotica artist who will pay top dollar for particularly exciting stories of wanton debauchery. The deflowering of Lan Wangji absolutely MUST qualify.

(I shall return to continue this narrative! Within the next few days, probably! Sit tight, friends!)

The following morning, LXC gets up. He dresses with painstaking care and fixes his guan in place. He feels as if he's preparing himself for battle.

In truth, he would prefer to be heading off to battle.

Facing down an army would be less daunting than telling their Uncle that his little A-Zhan is pregnant.

But LXC isn't going to be a coward about this! So he fetches the Lan physician, and head off.

There are no lectures this morning. Uncle will be in his study, grading the latest round of essays. Uncle's study is some distance from the classrooms, and that is best.

There will be a great deal of shouting, after all.

LXC would like to avoiding announcing the pregnancy to the ENITRETY of Cloud Recesses.

So he taps on the door of the study, and he enters.

He finds Uncle frowning over Nie Huaisang's pitiful attempt at a composition.

In another part of Cloud Recesses, WWX is confessing his terrible debaucheries to JYL.

JC watches with beady eyes, making sure that WWX doesn't weasel out of this.

But WWX does not! He makes a proper confession!

He kneels in repetenence!

He is very sorry for the embarrassment this will cause the Jiangs!

He's ESPECIALLY sorry that his bad behavior will reflect poorly on JYL!

He will make SURE to tell everyone that this is not her fault!

She did, in fact, raise him better than this! WWX will make sure everyone knows that!

If anyone tries to tarnish her reputation over his actions, WWX will FIGHT THEM! 😤

But he promises that he will DEFINITELY make this right.

He will marry Lan Zhan and raise his baby! They will have an excellent marriage, and they will make sure to raise the baby well! Nobody will ever be able to say that Wei Wuxian is a deadbeat father or a disloyal husband!

JYL is Shook.

She knew her little brother was in love, of course. She's not blind!

That's her little A-Xian. She knows him backwards and forwards. She could see that he was in love. That part was perfectly clear.

She can't read LWJ quite as well. But she was certain that he returned A-Xian's feelings.

For heaven's sake. LWJ asked her to teach him to make the pork rib and lotus root soup! For A-Xian!

Once you've started learning the Family Soup Recipes, things have gotten quite serious.

As far as Jiang sect courtship rituals go, making the Family Soup for your beloved is barely one step before marriage.

So of course they were quite serious about each other!

But like LXC, she thought the boys were still at the shyly-holding-hands stage.

She underestimated how devastatingly horny these two are for each other.

Anyway, once she gets over her surprise, she feels guilty.

Like LXC, she decides that this is partly her fault.

She is the Elder Sister here. She should have done a better job of supervising and chaperoning. She should have been more careful.

...She definitely should have talked to A-Xian about things like contraception, too. 😬

But what's done is done!

A-Xian is very young to become a father, of course. But it can't be helped. They'll just have to marry quickly and make the best of it.

At least they're in love, and they actually WANT to get married. JYL feels sure that will help matters along.

And there are servants and nursemaids and physicians to lend a hand with the child-rearing.

They'll manage. She'll help out as much as possible.

So she comforts WWX, and assures him she's not angry.

Everything will be all right. She'll help smooth things over with her parents, and with the Lan elders. They'll find a way to make this all right.

She wants to go find LXC immediately.

They must have an Older Sibling Confab at once! There are a lot of letters to be written, and a lot of wedding plans to be made. If LWJ is already two months along, there's no time to lose!

...They won't be able to pass this off as an early birth. Not if he's about three months along by the time they arrange the wedding.

But they can minimize the scandal. The sooner the wedding takes place, the better.

So she tries to find LXC, but she can't. She's told that he's currently having a private conversation with Grandmaster Qiren.

JYL winces. But she's certainly not going to interrupt THAT sort of thing. So she settles down and tries to wait patiently.

Anyway.

Back to LQR's study.

It's a beautiful morning in Cloud Recesses, and he is about to hear some horrible news.

The physician waits outside, preparing her herbs and remedies for qi-deviation. Meanwhile, LXC greets his uncle politely.

LQR is rather surprised to see his oldest nephew. But he's not sorry to take a break. He's reviewing NHS' hideous attempt at explaining the intricacies of cultivation work. He is already Suffering.

He sets the scroll aside and invites LXC to sit down. They prepare tea, and drink it slowly.

LXC has something on his mind. LQR can see that. But he doesn't attempt to guess what it might be. He sips his tea and waits patiently.

"Uncle," LXC says, after a long silence. "I have been thinking."

He sets his teacup down.

"I believe it's time to arrange Wangji's marriage."

LQR raises his eyebrows.

If he had tries to guess what his nephew came here to discuss...well, it wouldn't be THAT.

This is a rather suspicious line of talk, in fact.

The elders are, of course, quite eager to arrange marriages for the Twin Jades.

Yet it's not customary in their sect to arrange marriages during childhood. Traditionally, the Lans wait until a young man or woman is about twenty.

Now, LXC is old enough to start thinking of his own marriage. But in the past, he always ducked marriage talks quite expertly. LQR didn't have the heart to pursue the topic.

Wangji is rather young to be thinking of marriage.

He's not too young for a betrothal, though. In fact, LQR has had quite a few discussions with the elders about this.

No formal arrangements have been made, of course. But sometimes, one of the elders suggests this or that sect heir as a possible match.

Still.

LXC has made no secret of his feelings on this topic. He has his heart set on seeing his brother marry for love.

It's a small point of contention between LXC and LQR.

LXC accepts that, as Sect Leader, and he must eventually have a political match.

But he insists there's no need for Wangji to marry for the sake of an alliance. LXC's marriage will serve that purpose.

He says that Wangji should be able to choose a spouse based solely on compatibility and personal happiness.

LQR has a very low opinion of the concept of "young people being allowed to choose their spouses themselves."

His brother attempted to choose his own spouse, for the sake of love and personal happiness. Just look how that turned out.

Clearly, it's better to have the elders arrange these things. Young people are too immature to know what best. They can't make a proper choice without their elders' guidance.

LXC remains undaunted, though. He wants to see Wangji happily married to someone he truly likes.

So this is extremely suspicious. LXC is suddenly talking about arranging Wangji's marriage! A shocking departure from his previous position on the matter.

But LQR will let this conversation play out. He takes a measured sip of his tea.

"Do you have someone in mind?" he asks.

Naturally, LXC must have someone in mind. He wouldn't come here and instigate this discussion if he didn't.

Deep in his belly, LQR feels a sudden twist of dread.

Wangji has been spending a lot of time with...a certain disciple. That has not gone unnoticed.

But Cloud Recesses is hosting dozens of guest disciples at the moment. Perhaps LXC has decided that Jiang Wanyin would be a good choice. Or maybe he's thinking of Luo Qingyang.

They're talented young cultivators with respectable family backgrounds. They would be a good choice for Wangji.

Or perhaps LXC is looking farther afield. There's that sickly little Wen boy, and there's the frivolous Nie Huaisang.

They're not ideal choices, perhaps. But they're siblings or nephews to Great Sect leaders. Their breeding is unimpeachable.

Most importantly, they have never advocated for necromancy in the middle of LQR's classroom.

LQR holds his breath and waits.

His nephew's expression is perfectly neutral.

"I think," he says, "that Young Master Wei might be a good choice."

It would be a shocking breach of etiquette to throw out his arm, to sweep the tea-set onto the ground in a fit of rage.

So LQR doesn't.

But he grits his teeth, and takes deep breaths.

"Why?" he asks tersely.

His nephew is not an impulsive man. He would not come here, he would not propose Wangji's marriage to Wei Wuxian, unless he was prepared with some type of argument.

Sure enough, LXC settles himself at the table.

Good heavens, LQR thinks.

His nephew is actually prepared to DEBATE this. He thinks he can make some sort of argument in the match's favor. He is earnestly prepared to convince his uncle that WEI WUXIAN would make a good husband for Wangji.

LQR is dumbstruck.

"He's an exceptionally skilled cultivator," LXC points out. "Aside from Wangji, he's easily the most talented in his class."

LQR says nothing.

Unfortunately, he cannot refute this point.

WWX is extraordinarily talented.

In fact, he's one of the most gifted students LQR has ever encountered.

It's meaningless, since WWX insists on squandering his skills. He lacks discipline, so he will never make the most of his natural abilities.

But he is very talented. One of the rare students who can match Wangji's raw cultivation power and natural intelligence.

LQR cannot argue this point.

"Not many of the young men and women in the cultivation world can match Wangji's skill," LXC adds. "It would be best if he had a spouse who could keep up with him."

LQR takes another sip of his tea.

Of course, Wangji must marry someone talented and clever. That goes without saying. LQR will not see him married to a mediocre cultivator, or a stupid person.

But there are other talented cultivators in the world besides Wei Wuxian.

"That is your only argument?" he asks.

It isn't, of course. His nephew wouldn't come armed with only a feeble argument in favor of WWX's natural skill.

"And it would strengthen our ties to the Jiang sect," LXC says, promptly.

"Wei Wuxian is only Sect Leader Jiang's ward, not his child."

If they needed to strengthen their ties to the Jiang sect, it would be better to marry Wangji to Jiang Wanyin.

But LQR is not persuaded that such an alliance is especially vital anyway.

LXC is undeterred.

"He is very close to Jiang family," LXC says smoothly. "That's no secret. And he is the first disciple of the Jiang sect, a martial brother to the Jiang heir. It's not such a bad match."

LQR buys himself some time by finishing the last of his tea.

It isn't such a bad match, in truth. If Wei Wuxian had a different temperament, if he was a different person altogether, it might be a perfectly respectable match.

LQR could argue over Wei Wuxian's background. He could say that the son of a servant isn't good enough for Wangji.

But that would be crass.

LQR knew Wei Changze. He respected the man. He wouldn't shrink from marrying one of his nephews to Wei Changze's blood.

Wei Wuxian's FATHER isn't the problem here.

Besides, if he made some remark about the boy being the son of a servant, LXC wouldn't let that go.

He would quote dozens of rules: Do not be haughty. Do not look down on others. Do not slander others and praise yourself.

LQR will find no refuge in the rules. Not this time.

So he tries another tack.

"The boy has a poor temperament. He is unstable, and his morals aren't what they should be. It's not a suitable match."

There. He will not argue over Wei Wuxian's father, or his mother. The boy's behavior must speak for itself. His nephew can't object to THAT, surely.

And yet, his nephew does.

"I don't think his temperament is so bad," LXC remarks serenely. "It's true, he made some reckless remarks when he first arrived. But hasn't his performance in the classroom improved since then?"

LQR is sullenly silent.

It has improved somewhat, perhaps. WWX is marginally less likely to make imprudent remarks. He pays slightly more attention to the lessons. When he isn't brazenly staring at Wangji, at any rate.

The boys compositions are less sloppy, too.

LQR had hoped that Wangji had proved a good influence on Wei Wuxian.

Wangji always inspired the other disciples to behave themselves and study hard. He'd hoped that maybe, just maybe, Wei Wuxian had also decided to follow Wangji's example.

But that doesn't mean that Wei Wuxian's behavior is by any means exemplary.

And LQR will never forget how the boy stood up and advocated for demonic cultivation, right in front of the other impressionable students.

"He's still young," LXC adds meditatively. "And young men like to show off in front of their friends. Perhaps he only made those comments to get attention."

His tea is gone. LQR doesn't pour himself another cup. Instead, he folds his hands upon his lap.

He doesn't have a rebuttal. He drew similar conclusions himself, once he calmed down after Wei Wuxian's awful display.

It was hardly unusual for unruly disciples to seek attention by staging some sort of display in the classroom.

LQR had been teaching for quite some time. Most of the Lan disciples were well-behaved and diligent. But every now and then, LQR found himself confronted with a class clown.

WWX was clearly the type who enjoyed showing off in front of his classmates.

He likely had no idea what he was suggesting. He just thought it would scandalize others if he proposed demonic cultivation. The boy simply wanted attention, as many children did.

"We shouldn't hold one foolish remark against him forever," LXC adds.

LQR presses his lips into a thin line.

Even if his nephew is correct, even if Wei Wuxian's morals AREN'T hopelessly dissolute, the match is not a suitable one.

"He's too reckless. Arrogant." LQR shakes his head. "No respect for tradition or his elders! Wangji deserves someone better."

It was wrong to have favorites, of course. A teacher must be impartial. LQR ought not favor any student above another.

Uncles must be impartial, too. It would be very wrong for LQR to favor either of his nephews.

But he does favor Wangji slightly, and LXC knows it.

He doesn't begrudge Uncle's partiality in the slightest. His younger brother is a favorite with him, too. LXC has made no secret of that. They are both extremely partial to Wangji, and exceptionally protective of him.

Wangji is simply special. And that means that he deserves only the best in terms of marriage partners.

LXC wants to see his brother married for love.

LQR has no objection. But he will make sure that Wangji falls in love with someone suitable. Someone of high cultivation and unimpeachable virtue. Someone worthy of Wangji.

If Wangji decides to fall in love, LQR will make sure his nephew gives his heart to the correct person.

He will not allow Wangji to make his father's mistake, giving his heart away to someone wholly unworthy. He will make sure that Wangji chooses properly.

His nephew shatters that fantasy with a few well-chosen words.

"Wangji is very fond of Young Master Wei," LXC says.

LQR freezes.

"He seems to be very fond of Wangji, too," LXC adds.

LQR swallows around a dry throat.

He had not intended to have another cup of tea. He allows himself only three cups during the morning, and three cups he has already had. But in the wake of this news, he must indulge further.

He pours himself another cup, with painstaking slowness.

Once he has drunk it, he musters up a reply.

"If that's the case, then we shouldn't encourage such feelings."

He stares into his empty cup.

"We should separate them quickly."

His mind is already whirling, making plans. Wei Wuxian has done nothing to warrant expulsion yet. It might offend Sect Leader Jiang if they send the boy home early.

But what of that? They must not allow this...attachment to deepen. Wei Wuxian must leave Cloud Recesses at once.

"They're young," Lan Qiren adds, almost to himself. "Once they're apart, they'll lose interest in one another."

They were barely children really. Wangji was only sixteen. Wei Wuxian was freshly seventeen. It was only puppy love, nothing more.

Once they were apart, the attachment would shatter. LQR would take care to introduce Wangji to other, more suitable partners. He would show Wangji how inadequate Wei Wuxian was in comparison.

As for Wei Wuxian, of course he would forget Wangji. He was a frivolous, inconstant boy. He would find someone else to flirt with, someone else to chase around and pester.

Within a year, they would forget that they'd ever been 'fond' of one another.

LQR ignores the twinge of doubt in his chest.

It had never been quite so easy for Lans to forget their first love. Many never forgot at all. If their first attachment was not fruitful, they never formed another. They remained unmarried for the rest of their days.

But he wouldn't allow that to happen to Wangji. It was simply a matter of separating the pair quickly, before any further damage could be done.

"I don't think that's true," LXC says gently. "Uncle. I don't think that YOU believe that's true."

But what LQR believed was quite irrelevant here.

This conversation had been terribly meandering, but it was useful in the end. It had shown LQR what must be done.

His nephew wished to sound him out, to try to coax him into accepting a courtship between Wangji and Wei Wuxian.

That, of course, would not happen. If there was a budding courtship, then LQR intended to ruthlessly prune it.

Wei Wuxian must leave. At once.

LXC draws in a slow, deliberate breath.

LQR does not like the sound of that. His nephew sounds like he's preparing to say something more, and LQR feels that this conversation has gone quite far enough.

"I am...persuaded that they have deep feeling for each other." LXC smiles slightly. "That they would like to marry."

LQR feels another twist of dread. This one is sharper, and rather more vicious.

"What has persuaded you of THAT?"

"Wangji told me so," LXC says.

He has the audacity to speak calmly, almost serenely.

As if this is not absolutely HORRIFIC news.

LQR intends to speak, or perhaps simply gasp in horror.

But LXC pushes on.

"Young Master Wei has also assured me that his intentions are honorable, and that he would like to marry Wangji."

LQR's mouth drops open.

It takes several long moments for LQR to muster up a reply.

"You have spoken to them of this?" he chokes out. "You have SPOKEN to them of marriage?!"

It is shockingly unfilial behavior. LXC may technically be Sect Leader, but he is young. He is not the most senior member of their family, not by a long shot.

If this boy, this Wei Wuxian, wants to marry Wangji, he should not address LXC. He should address LQR and the elders.

Better yet, the Jiangs should address the Lan elders!

The children have no business deciding this sort of thing amongst themselves. LXC has no business negotiating a marriage on Wangji's behalf, without consulting LQR.

LXC knows better than to do this sort of thing. LQR is genuinely shocked.

But his nephew simply inclines his head.

"I have spoken to them," he admits.

LXC draws in another deep breath.

"Uncle," he says.

His voice is very gentle. The dread is back, pulsing in LQR's stomach like a living creature.

"I spoke to both Wangji and Young Master Wei last night. I would like to tell you the end result of that conversation, before I tell you what prompted it."

LQR does not like that arrangement at all.

It is neither logical nor orderly. His nephew should tell him WHY he thought it appropriate to speak to his brother about marriage. He should explain WHY he started negotiating with Wei Wuxian, without summoning the elders or making a report to his uncle.

But he's too shocked to speak, and his nephew takes advantage of that.

"Wangji told me that he and Young Master Wei have been courting for some time. They are devoted to each other, and they would like to marry. Wangji seemed quite certain of the depth of his feelings."

LQR can't seem to draw sufficient air into his lungs.

Rather than showing concern, like a filial child, his nephew simply keeps talking.

"Naturally, I spoke to Young Master Wei. I wanted to know if he felt the same way about Wangji."

LXC exhales slowly.

"He assured me that he does. He cares deeply for Wangji, and he has been taking this courtship seriously."

"He wants to marry Wangji," LXC adds, "if the elders will give their permission."

At last, LQR manages to choke out a response.

"I do NOT give permission," he gasps.

"Under no circumstances will I give permission! They will be punished for daring to start a courtship without consulting their families. Then Wei Wuxian will return to Lotus Pier, and that will be the end of it!"

There. At last, LQR has a perfectly valid reason to expel Wei Wuxian. He had the audacity to begin a courtship without permission, to approach Wangji without the elders' approval!

LQR can expel him for that, certainly. Sect Leader Jiang will have no room to object.

As for Wangji...

Well, of course he's not truly to blame. Wei Wuxian must have deceived him, lured him, misled him.

Wangji simply didn't know what he was doing. LQR has taken great care to ensure that no inappropriate persons, no seducers, ever get anywhere near Wangji.

Wangji's behavior must be corrected. He will receive a light punishment, and LQR will explain why he must be more careful in the future. He must not allow anyone to lure him into a courtship without his family's approval. His elders will choose a proper spouse for him in time.

The situation is not beyond repair.

But the smile on his nephew's face has grown rather strained.

"Uncle," he says. "I'm afraid that will be impossible."

"Why?" Lan Qiren demands. "Why should it be impossible? Wei Wuxian will pack his bags and be gone before nightfall. What is to prevent us from expelling him for this transgression?"

His nephew's smile grows more strained than ever.

"I am afraid," LXC speaks slowly and deliberately, "that they will have to get married. As quickly as possible."

Perhaps LQR's heart stops. It certainly feels like that, anyway. His mind goes blank, and he can neither speak nor breath.

He cannot understand what his nephew is telling him.

No, he cannot ACCEPT what his nephew is telling him. He understands the subtext and innuendo perfectly well. But he cannot accept it.

Wangji wouldn't. He simply wouldn't. He's too well-brought-up.

But that Wei Wuxian! He's capable of anything. Perhaps he's even capable of deceiving Wangji into doing something he knows he shouldn't.

LQR's heart stutters.

"Uncle."

His nephew's voice is treacherously, mercilessly kind.

"I am sorry. But it seems that Wangji is pregnant. About two months along."

LQR cannot reply. He's on the floor, his nephew crouched down beside him.

LXC is speaking rapidly, soothingly. But LQR cannot hear him.

The last thing he's conscious of is the physician, rushing through the doors of his study.

(Taking a break now! Will continue this another time!)

...There are at least seven vitally important things I should be working on right now.

And yet.

Here I am.

So, a while back, someone on tumblr pointed out that there's an awful lot of Soup Drama in The Untamed. And they're right!

Of course, we're clearly meant to understand: The Soup is a shorthand for the bond between JYL and WWX.

But someone was like, "What if...the Jiang sect is just...Like That? What if Soup Drama is just a THING in their sect?"

And that concept absolutely delights me!

So yes! Soup is very important to Jiangs!

They have many rites, rituals, and prescribed behaviors when it comes to Soup!

You know how WWX almost murders JZX over The Soup?

That's just a Jiang clan thing! Any other Jiang disciple would have done the same!

Someone spurned Lady Jiang's soup?!

En garde, sir!

Insulting someone's soup is like insulting their mother. You simply Don't Do That.

Also, soup plays an important part in courtship rituals!

Making soup for family? Fine. Normal. Mandatory, in fact.

Making soup for a nonrelative? That's a fucking marriage proposal, right there.

Every household has their own special Family Soup. For the Yunmeng Sibs, it's obviously the pork-and-lotus soup.

These soup recipes are a closely guarded secret! You are only allowed to know the soup recipe if you marry into the family!

Asking to learn the Family Soup recipe is equivalent to stating that you want to marry into the family.

Long story short: when LWJ asked JYL to teach him to make The Soup for her little brother?

She was like

As far as the Jiangs are concerned, he might as well have marched up to WWX and started singing the chorus to Natasha Bedingfield's "I Wanna Have Your Babies."

So JYL knew exactly what to do in this situation. She said, "Yes. Of course I will teach you how to make The Soup. :)"

Then she ran back to her rooms and started working on the seating chart for the wedding.

It also puts a funny little spin on the out-of-wedlock pregnancy.

Of course, it's Not Good that A-Xian got Lan Wangji pregnant.

...But on the other hand, he was making soup for A-Xian! They had already made the deepest, most vital commitment that a couple can make!

Imagine the Jiang disciples hearing about this.

"Did you hear? Wei Wuxian got Second Young Master Lan pregnant! Before the wedding night!!"

Jiang disciples: 😱😱😱

"It happened AFTER he made Wei Wuxian the Jiang Family Soup, though."

Jiang disciples: ...Oh. Well, that's fine then! They were basically common-law married!

Just a fun little worldbuilding detail for ya there.

Anyway! Back to the main story!

After the Pregnancy Reveal, LQR takes to his bed like a Victorian woman who just learned that her husband has died at sea.

The physician says this is best. He needs to rest and recuperate, and he must avoid stress at all costs.

On these grounds, LXC persuades his uncle not to speak with Wangji for the time being.

Wangji is in a Delicate Condition. It is not good for him to be exposed to fighting or recriminations. Besides, Uncle will only upset himself and endanger his own health!

LXC is prepared to handle everything! He has a meeting scheduled with the rest of the elders, and a letter drafted for Sect Leader Jiang!

...He loves and respects his uncle. But frankly, it would be a lot easier to push through a quick wedding without LQR's involvement.

LQR does not want to agree to this arrangement. But he doesn't have much choice. He's still coughing up blood every time he thinks about A-Zhan being pregnant.

So he agrees to stay in his rooms and rest.

In the meantime, though. He has imposed Punishment.

...It's not too dire, really.

LWJ is confined to his quarters for the time being. He must copy Conduct a whole bunch of times.

He is also supposed to spend his days meditating on the Importance of Abstinence, and why we don't allow handsome interlopers to sweet-talk us into spreading our legs behind the rabbit fields.

That is not how LQR terms it, of course. But that's the gist of his message.

LQR privately maintains that this situation is All Wei Wuxian's Fault.

Wangji acted foolishly, but only because Wei Wuxian led him on! If not for that demon, his little Wangji would have remained pure and chaste as the driven snow!

Having intercourse out of wedlock would never even have OCCURED to Wangji! It only happened because some awful young man put IDEAS into his innocent head!

(Smash-cut to a montage of the incredibly enthusiastic, creative sex wangxian have had in the last four months.

Several extended shots of LWJ, ripping off his boyfriend's clothes and riding him like a pony.)

Meanwhile, WWX is copying rules in the library again.

LQR wanted to do a lot worse. He really did.

But LXC pointed out that a harsh punishment like a whipping would only stir up gossip.

People would want to know what provoked such a punishment. Then the pregnancy would surely be discovered.

Besides, it's best to speak to Sect Leader Jiang. If someone's going to order Wei Wuxian to be whipped, it should be him. He's the boy's guardian.

(LXC is not going to allow any whipping whatsoever. But he knows how to placate his uncle, and LQR agrees.)

However, LQR decides that Wangji and Wei Wuxian are not to see each other.

Not under any circumstances, not on any pretenses! They are being quarantined separately, to reflect upon their sins!

Fortunately, they have indulgent older siblings.

So LXC visits his brother in the mornings, and picks up a letter for WWX.

He passes it off to JYL, who passes it to her brother. WWX reads it, and hastily scribbles a reply.

Then JYL brings soup for LWJ every afternoon.

(He's got to keep his strength up! She must make sure that her niece or nephew is healthy and well-nourished! The baby must have S O U P.)

She hides WWX's letter in basket containing the soup, so LWJ can see his response. Then LWJ writes back.

So they've got a whole secret correspondence going on here, and they are not completely isolated from each other.

Let's be honest with ourselves: we all know that these letters are EXTREMELY melodramatic.

Wangxian write to each other like Revolutionary War soldiers, separated by a battlefield and an ocean.

From their letters, you'd think they've been apart for three years rather than three days. It's frankly ridiculous.

But they're teenagers, they're in love, and they're having a baby.

Let them have this.

Let them be Dramatic about their temporary separation.

Anyway. LWJ is hidden away in his rooms. That turns out to be a good thing, because right about then, the morning sickness kicks in with a vengeance. 🤢

For the first time, LWJ is having some Regrets over his reckless actions.

Nobody remarks upon his sudden absence. When your kunze classmate disappears for a week, everyone knows what that means: they're in heat.

It's considered indelicate to comment on that. So nobody does. They just go about their business.

WWX's exile to the library doesn't raise any eyebrows either.

That's happened to him, like, three times since he arrived in Cloud Recesses.

So he mouthed off to Grandmaster Qiren and got punished again! Very on brand. No further questions, your honor.

Grandmaster Qiren's absence is a little more intriguing.

But remember, the disciples are sixteen or seventeen. In their eyes, a man LQR's age has one foot in the grave. He's over forty-five! Positively ancient!

So when they hear that he's sick, they're not exactly surprised.

Nobody really connects the dots. JC and JYL are keeping their mouths firmly shut.

The goal here is simple: get through this mess with a minimum of public embarrassment.

They are not going to do anything to provoke gossip or blow the lid off this scandal.

NHS enjoys knowing about the scandal before it blows up. He obligingly remains silent, too.

But he does write a few letters to his brother that basically say, "I know something you don't know~!" and "I'm so glad I flunked last year and had to come back for another term!"

NMJ gets suspicious and writes to LXC.

If his little brother is Up To Something, he wants to know about it!

Now, wangxian aren't the only ones enjoying an epistolary romance!

LXC and NMJ invented that shit! They have been doing this long-distance thing for ages.

And since they're so close, LXC doesn't hesitate to confess the truth about his brother's pregnancy.

Like everyone, NMJ is Shook when he learns that WWX has knocked up LWJ.

He writes back to LXC:

But LXC does not!

He assures NMJ that everything will be fine. Young Master Wei plans to Do The Honorable thing.

LXC has had some time to adjust to the idea. He's happy about the baby, truly. He did not plan to become an uncle this soon, but he's not one to quibble.

He has his heart set on having a little niece or nephew to spoil. He's all in on this. So he would like for nobody to murder his soon-to-be brother-in-law. :)

...While all this furtive correspondence is happening, JFM shows up.

He received a letter from LXC, politely requesting his presence at Cloud Recesses at the earliest possible opportunity.

He received another letter from LQR. This one basically said, "Get your butt over here. RIGHT NOW. We need to TALK."

JFM has a strong suspicion that A-Xian has Done Something.

But he doesn't want to admit that to his wife. So he tries to be subtle.

He plays it off like, "Oh, I'm just going to pop by Cloud Recesses for a bit. Just to see the kids. 🥺 We've been separated so long. 🥺 I miss them so. 🥺"

YZY is nobody's fool, so she's not buying that. She, at least, can connect the dots.

But whatever WWX has done, she doesn't want to deal with it.

JFM brought the brat into their home, and he can clean up whatever mess the boy has made.

So she waves her husband off and does not ask any questions.

Besides, she and JFM both assume that this is a relatively minor matter.

They have already heard about the inappropriate-necromancy-suggestions in the classroom. They assume the current problem is more of the same.

Or maybe WWX has been caught smuggling in alcohol, or running an underground gambling ring.

Annoying and inappropriate! But nothing that other disciples haven't been caught doing before.

JFM thinks that he'll just have to sit down with LQR and smooth things over. He'll apologize on WWX's behalf. He'll get WWX to apologize properly, if he hasn't done so already.

Maybe he'll have to engage in some light bribery, in order to ensure that WWX doesn't get kicked out.

A little hint that JFM will make SURE to offer extra-favorable terms, the next time they're negotiating fishing rights at the Jiang-Lan border!

You know, that sort of thing.

Really, this is a proud tradition.

Disciples go off to Cloud Recesses. Then they get busted breaking one of the THREE THOUSAND rules.

Their parents grovel before LQR. They promise political favors so he won't kick their kids out out of Magical Boarding School.

Their kids get to stay. They make connections and socialize with the cultivation world up-and-comers. Easy peasy! Everyone wins!

So JFM trots off, wholly unaware of what's about to hit him.

He arrives in Cloud Recesses, and he's shown to a private meeting room.

Someone serves him tea. He learns that his children are currently in class, and LQR is not feeling well. He will be meeting with LXC today.

All well and good! LXC is much easier to handle than LQR.

JFM probably won't have to resort to any bribery at all! He'll just apologize, and be on his way.

But then the servant mentions that LXC will be joined by a few of the Lan sect elders.

...Uh oh.

That is not Standard Operating Procedure for minor disciplinary infractions. When the elders show up for a meeting between sect leaders, that means shit has well and truly hit the fan.

LXC and the elders file in.

LXC's expressions is pretty polite and neutral! But the Lan elders look royally PISSED.

JFM:

Ah. Not your typical teenager-got-caught-breaking-the-no-liquor rule.

Right then.

There is a Problem here.

(Sidenote: the Lan elders are very much Team-LWJ-did-nothing-wrong-it-was-obviously-all-that-Wei-boy's-fault.

Is this fair or rational? No! But that is their opinion, and they are sticking to it.

They know LWJ. They have watched him grow up.)

(They would side with One Of Their Own, in any event. But LWJ has such a reputation for being a Good Kid, a star student, a rule-follower and an Example To Us All.

So they remain convinced that WWX is a wicked seducer who has RUINED their innocent boy.)

(Again, and I cannot stress this enough:

Smash-cut to a montage of LWJ ridin' than thang like the cops are behind him.)

The elders have, blessedly, not seen that montage. So they glare murder at JFM as they file into the room and take their seats.

This is his fault, too. He has a Reputation for being too indulgent with his children.

And while the Lans are not supposed to listen to gossip, everyone knows about WWX's background.

Everyone knows that JFM was in love with CSSR.

Everyone knows that he dotes on WWX, because he reminds him of her.

JFM is responsible for this mess!

If he'd been a proper Stern Parent, maybe none of this would have happened! He wasn't strict enough with WWX. That's the trouble.

So the elders give JFM the stink-eye. Meanwhile, LXC clears his throat.

...He does not try to ease JFM into this. That was a privilege solely reserved for his uncle. A gift to the man who raised him.

LXC just tells JFM the situation, straight-up.

LWJ is pregnant with WWX's baby. They are, obviously, going to have to marry immediately.

LXC has spoken to his brother and WWX. It seems they are prepared to Take Responsibility for their actions. They are willing to marry, and make the best of things.

Under the circumstances, the Lan sect will not object to the marriage. Does JFM have any objections?

He gives JFM a smile, which clearly says:

JFM bluescreens for a while there.

Physically, he is here.

Mentally, he is back at Lotus Pier, staring out at a lotus lake at twilight, while Enya's "Only Time" plays in the background.

LXC graciously gives him a few minutes. He serves the tea snacks and waits.

JFM goes through an entire emotional journey within 30 seconds.

...Is this his fault? Well, yes, of course it is. But to what extent?

He knows perfectly well that most people think he's far too indulgent with A-Xian. And perhaps that's true.

But he didn't think he had any other choice.

WWX is, heartbreakingly, not his son. He's CSSR and WCZ's boy. So JFM has to raise him they way THEY would have raised him.

CSSR would never forgive him, if he raised the boy to be a stuffy and uptight and proper young master!

She had the soul-calming ceremony, but never mind THAT. If he raised WWX that way, she WOULD come back and haunt the life out of him.

She was a free-spirit to the core.

And WCZ chose that life, too. He chose the life that JFM couldn't offer either of them. JFM was tied to his sect, to his duties, to customs and rituals and responsibilities.

They weren't. They didn't want to be.

So how could he dare to raise WWX that way? How could he crush A-Xian's spirit and force him to live in a small box of 'propriety'?

JFM couldn't do it. He couldn't.

And yes, A-Xian reminded him of his mother. But he reminded JFM of his father, too.

JFM had loved them both dearly, and he wanted to do right by them. He wanted to raise their son to be the kind of person who would meet with their approval.

So he'd given A-Xian a great deal of free rein, and he thought it had worked out well.

A-Xian could be a little reckless, yes. He often failed to think things through, and he tended to act on emotion.

But JFM had never doubted that A-Xian's heart was in the right place. He never doubted that A-Xian was a thoroughly decent young man.

Now, all at once, he's wondering if he COMPLETELY failed as a guardian and caregiver.

Did A-Xian grow up to be the kind of person who's careless with other people's hearts and bodies?!

LXC can see the muted panic in JFM's eyes. And he understands.

He had the same reaction when he learned about the pregnancy. And he knows, deep down, that Uncle is suffering through the same thing.

The horror. The distress. The sudden questioning whether you have COMPLETELY FAILED someone who looked up to you for guidance.

LXC gets it.

"Sect Leader Jiang," he says gently. "I am fully convinced there was fault on both sides."

The Lan elders shift restlessly.

They are NOT convinced of that. But they are not about to contradict their sect leader in the middle of an important meeting.

So they drink their tea and let LXC speak.

"Wangji and Young Master Wei were...reckless. But I believe this happened because they are very much in love."

LXC pauses.

"I understand," he adds, "that they already had a private understanding. Even before this happened, they had planned to marry."

JFM lets out a huge breath of relief.

That is...still not ideal. It is not ideal at all.

But it's a thousand times better than the alternative. At least A-Xian didn't seduce somebody for his own selfish pleasure. At least there was love involved, and a plan to marry.

It's not a good situation.

JFM sent a young man into someone else's household. There was certainly a tacit understanding that the young man in question would REFRAIN from impregnating anyone in his host's household.

This is very embarrassing for the Jiangs, of course. Fishing rights at the border will not make up for this sort of thing!

JFM knows perfectly well that the Lans will take their pound of flesh in the form of an exorbitant marriage payment. They will squeeze him dry in the marriage negotiations.

And his wife will be furious once she finds out how much WWX's marriage has cost them.

But JFM always intended to pay for A-Xian's wedding. He began setting aside money for THAT a long time ago.

Besides, he would never begrudge A-Xian the opportunity to marry for love. It's what his parents did. It's what they would want for him.

He lets out another shaky sigh.

"The Jiang sect...has no objection to this match."

LXC's smile sharpens.

"In that case. Should we discuss the terms of the marriage?"

One of the elders is busy unrolling a map. JFM resists the urge to pass a hand over his face.

He can't afford to show weakness this early in the negotiations. But good heavens.

If there are maps involved, then the Lans want land.

They want access to the silver mines. They want a share in Yunmeng's dye industry. They want fishing rights, just for the sake of it. They want everything they can get.

JFM merely shakes his head. There's no helping THAT, of course.

But if they're going to demand an expansive marriage payment from the Jiangs, then JFM is going to demand an equally generous marriage portion from the Lans.

They may as well make this a PROPER marriage, he decides.

They may as well renegotiate every treaty while they're at it. It's what he did with the Jins, when he arranged for A-Li to marry Young Master Jin.

He won't have anyone claiming that A-Xian's marriage was a slapdash affair, not in keeping with gentry customs.

Besides, he intends to make sure that the baby has a proper inheritance.

CSSR wouldn't care about that, of course. She would delight in a grandchild, but she wouldn't care whether the baby was master or mistress of an estate.

But JFM does. He won't have the baby shortchanged.

He bows respectfully.

"Yes, Sect Leader Lan. Let's negotiate!"

(Pausing here for now!

I am very much making this story up as I go along. 😅 So if there's something you'd like to see in future installments, please let me know!)

A bump to the top of the teen pregnancy wangxian AU, in case you're just tuning in!

https://twitter.com/cicerfics/status/1359280225108938752

Continued here, ICYMI:

https://twitter.com/cicerfics/status/1359314814389030913

ON TODAY'S EPISODE OF TEEN MOM: CLOUD RECESSES EDITION

So WWX is sitting there, barbecue sauce on his titties...

No, I'm totally kidding. He's still in the library copying lines. ✌️

He has been assigned a new Detention Monitor, since he impregnated the old one.

The new guy is a teacher at Cloud Recesses. He's at least fifteen years older than WWX. He's also married, and a zhongyong to boot.

WWX cannot help feeling there is a hidden message here!

It's like the Lan elders tried to make SURE that WWX couldn't knock this one up. No matter how hard he tried.

WWX is honestly a bit salty about that!

Do they really think so little of him!

Do they think he would be UNFAITHFUL to Lan Zhan! His future husband, who is carrying his child at this very moment!

Do the Lans think he just goes around sleeping with people for FUN?!

...Not that he didn't have fun sleeping with Lan Zhan. 🤤

But their sex was about love! Love, and also fun!

And yes, WWX is aware that the Lan sect has just cause to be mad at him.

If someone knocked up JYL before the wedding night? WWX would knock out the offender's teeth.

He should be grateful that his own teeth have been spared throughout this ordeal. He knows that.

But he has been separated from LWJ! Separated, from his pregnant husband-to-be!

That is not very cash money of the Lan sect!

So WWX is sulking.

He tries to deliberately give his new Detention Monitor the silent treatment. But WWX isn't very good at that.

Also, he wants information about LWJ.

But the Dentition Monitor ignores him!

And this guy doesn't even have the good grace to be super cute, the way Lan Zhan was when HE ignored WWX!

So WWX feels very slighted. He drops his attempts at conversation and he sullenly turns back to his copying.

He pretends he wasn't interested in talking to this guy anyway.

WWX:

He wants to do a good job of enduring this punishment. He wants Lan Zhan's family to like him. He wants them to approve of the marriage.

He particularly wants to be allowed to see Lan Zhan again. Because he is STRESSING OUT over this separation.

Shijie has been visiting Lan Zhan every day. She says he's doing fine.

LXC has also been making regular reports. He says his brother is okay. The baby doing okay too.

But they say that Lan Zhan has been really nauseated! And that makes WWX upset.

Is that normal?

Well, of course it's normal!

WWX doesn't know anything about pregnancy. (That's how they got into this mess.) But even he knows that people get nauseated during pregnancy.

But is it normal? Is it REALLY normal?? Will Lan Zhan be okay???

He's so agitated, LXC decides to arrange for a consultation with the Lan physicians.

LXC thinks it would be best if the boys learned a bit more about pregnancy!

...And contraception, too.

LXC is happy about his coming niece/nephew, yes. But he would prefer not to have ANOTHER baby arrive nine months after the first. 😬

So he gives the boys to access the grown-up reading material. And he has them talk with the physicians.

In between copying lines for LQR, the boys are doing book reports on pregnancy. Finally, they are receiving Proper Sex Ed!

LWJ doesn't mind being assigned this task.

He is determined to get an A+ on every school assignment! He likes book reports! He likes reading and research!

Plus, he wants to do a good job at being pregnant. So he throws himself into his studies, and he's fairly content.

He is learning All About Pregnancy. He's going to make sure his baby stays healthy. He's even learning what to expect from the delivery.

All is well in the Jingshi!

But in the library, WWX is panicking. He is not handling his book reports with that sort of equanimity.

The books are full of HIGHLY DISTRESSING INFORMATION.

Apparently, babies are sometimes born upside down! Then the doctors have to cut them out!

Sometimes things go very wrong during pregnancy or the delivery!

And even if nothing goes wrong, pregnancy sounds terrible!

There's vomiting, backaches, stretchmarks, and swollen feet. There is also the absolute horror of childbirth itself.

If the research project was supposed to calm WWX down, the plan failed. He's more agitated than ever.

He also feels extremely terrible for putting Lan Zhan through this!

They talked about kids, of course.

They planned to get married, so they talked about lots of things! They made all kinds of delightful plans for the future.

Naturally, those plans involved babies.

WWX assumed they would have little ones of their own someday. That's usually what happened when a qianyuan married a kunze.

But if he'd known all of this before, he would have suggested adoption! He certainly would've been more careful about preventing pregnancy!

So he's feeling awfully guilty.

And he's not even allowed to see Lan Zhan or help take care of him. So WWX is cranky and mopey and restless.

...At this point, he is not an absolute delight to be around.

JYL is sympathetic, of course. She tries to comfort him and reassures him that everything will be all right.

The Lan physicians are extremely skilled, after all! They will make sure that nothing happens to LWJ or the baby! So A-Xian doesn't need to worry one bit!

NHS is tolerating WWX's sulking with good grace.

There's plenty more drama in store, and he's grateful to WWX for providing it. So he's willing to be a sympathetic ear.

He pats his friend on the back as WWX whines about how he's been cruelly separated from his One True Love.

JC is less sympathetic!

He is tolerating things with considerably less good grace!

He is still incredibly upset about all this!

First: The out-of-wedlock pregnancy itself.

Absolutely a scandal and a disgrace for both clans! He's upset that WWX put everyone into this situation.

Second: It's not yet clear what will happen to WWX.

Will he have to go live in Cloud Recesses full time?

The Lans will probably want LWJ to stay in his natal sect. At least part-time.

If so, WWX will have to stay with his husband and his child. He won't be in Lotus Pier full-time!

JC has been Abandoned.

JC:

Of course, JC is not planning to be honest about his feelings.

Dear god. Can you even imagine.

He's not going to hug his brother and say, "I love you, and I will miss you terribly if you move away. I'm upset because I don't want you to go."

Nope. He's just gonna be passive-aggressive and bitchy.

He's gonna yell at WWX about the absolute disgrace of it all. Wei Wuxian, I can't believe you've done this!

Emotional honesty WHOMST.

WWX doesn't understand the deeper subtext. He just thinks his brother is very cranky and unsympathetic about the pregnancy.

Which is awfully unfair!

Of course WWX is sorry for his carelessness NOW.

Especially since he discovered that he's doomed his beloved to nine months of body horror!

He is truly repentant! He thinks JC could stand to be a little kinder about all this. :(

But at the moment, WWX is copying his lines dutifully. He's trying to look like a Repentant and Upstanding Young Man.

Meanwhile, he's thinking about Lan Zhan and the baby. He's worrying about whether they're okay and wondering whether they miss him.

He wonders if the baby will be a boy or a girl. He's very curious to know what the baby's designation will be.

It doesn't matter, of course. WWX doesn't have any special preference. But he wants to know anyway, so he can sketch a mental picture of his baby.

He wonders if the baby will look like him, or if it will look like Lan Zhan.

He hopes it will look like Lan Zhan! Lan Zhan is so beautiful, and he's so cute when he's angry. It would be great to see a little baby with Lan Zhan's cheeks and nose and lips.

WWX sketches a little drawing of Lan Zhan and their baby. He almost cries over it, and the Detention Monitor gives him a suspicious look.

So WWX slips the sketch into his pockets.

He'll smuggle it to Lan Zhan later. That way, Lan Zhan will know that WWX is thinking of their new family!

He keeps copying his lines and gradually zones out.

He's got a rhythm going. He doesn't even have to think about what he copying. His hand just works on autopilot while his thoughts drift.

That defeats the purpose of this punishment, but WWX doesn't care.

He's thinking very good and virtuous thoughts, after all! He's planning out how he can be a good father. 💪

He's thinking about names. He's making a list of baby toys to buy. He's deciding when he should teach the baby how to swim and pick lotus seeds.

He is Preparing For Fatherhood.

Right about then, JFM shows up.

The negotiations have paused for the day. They made some good progress! But JFM really needs to bring in a few of the Jiang elders before the final contracts are signed. That's only traditional during marriage negotiations.

So JFM had to send a Very Uncomfortable Letter to his wife, explaining what was going on.

The good news: The Lans are prepared to bestow a very generous marriage portion on Lan Wangji!

The final marriage contract will be mutually favorable.

The match will strengthen ties between the Jiang and Lan sects for several generations.

It is really very politically advantageous for everyone involved. They could hardly have hoped to secure a better marriage alliance for their sect's first disciple.

The bad news: ...Um. Everything else about this situation.

Anyway. Can his wife please send a few of the elders to Cloud Recesses, so they can finalize the marriage contract.

Also, can she please prepare the other stuff they will need. Like wedding robes for A-Xian and the traditional betrothal cakes.

The wedding will happen very soon, probably within a fortnight, so there is no time to lose!

JFM signs the letter and sends it off. He feels the metaphorical noose tighten around his neck as he watches the messenger depart.

But now he has to talk to the children.

He arranges to have JYL and JC pulled out of class.

They are both Nervous about this chat. They seem to think that they are going to be in trouble because they let their brother impregnate somebody.

But JFM has been clonked on the head! He has realized some things!

The fact that his daughter has been charged with raising her siblings is Bad, Actually!

That was JFM's job, and he has been way too hands-off as a parent.

It is also Bad that his son thinks he will be blamed for this. That's not his job, either.

So JFM affirms that he if anyone dropped the ball here, it was him. JYL and JC are not to blame.

But he's going to fix the situation up nicely!

This will be a proper, respectable marriage. They will treat this like a long-planned political alliance, rather than an embarrassing shotgun wedding.

It's gonna work out fine. There is no need for the children to worry.

Spoiler alert: They are Worrying.

They know their mother. They know this out-of-wedlock pregnancy is going to be a Family Drama.

But they are somewhat reassured for now. So JFM heads off to the library to find A-Xian.

WWX is half-assedly copying his lines, daydreaming about parenthood, when JFM shows up.

He freezes.

JFM has never been harsh with him before, of course.

But WWX has never impregnated anyone before. He certain hasn't impregnated any Second Young Master Lans before this!

Maybe he has finally gone Too Far!

Maybe JFM will finally regret having taken him in!

Maybe he has caused Too Much Embarrassment for the Jiang sect, and he's going to be disowned!

He's sweating, y'all.

The Detention Monitor is huffy that the punishment has been interrupted. But he can't exactly forbid Sect Leader Jiang from speaking to his own ward.

So he agrees that WWX can take a break. Then he departs.

JFM can already see that the Detention Monitor knows about the pregnancy.

The Lan sect is trying to keep the matter quiet, for as long as possible. They don't want the news to leak out until AFTER the wedding.

They are very much hoping that LWJ will be one of those people who doesn't show until the 5-6 month mark!

Of course, the baby will still show up Suspiciously Early. And it will probably be a strapping eight-pounder, so they will have trouble passing it off as a premie.

But they want plausible deniability. They want to pretend that this was not an out-of-wedlock pregnancy, followed by a shotgun marriage.

JFM wholly supports that approach!

But the Detention Monitor clearly knows.

He gives WWX a look as he departs. A very special "you despoiled Our Perfect And Pure Second Young Master, you hooligan!" look.

(Obligatory smash-cut to a montage of LWJ being extremely Hornee, while 'WAP' plays in the background.)

(Truly, there are Whores In This House.)

Anyone, the Detention Monitor leaves.

And WWX knows better than to stint on the apologies! He knelt in apology before LXC. He knelt in apology before JYL. He definitely has to kneel in apology before JFM, too!

So he tries to do that!

He is very, very sorry about this!

All the embarrassment for the Jiang sect! JFM being called here to get yelled at by the Lan elders! Having to lower himself to apologize on WWX's behalf!

WWX is sorry!

He already promised the Lans that he Wasn't Raised To Do This Sort of Thing!

This is definitely his mistake, and not the Jiang clan's fault!

They are Better Than This! It's just WWX who is a hooligan, and the Jiangs shouldn't be blamed at all!

JFM disagrees, as it happens.

It has occurred to him that the sex-ed portion of his sect's curriculum must be...lacking.

Like LXC, he plans to make some changes to their educational curriculum.

At the very least, they need to have a few seminars on Why The Pullout Method Doesn't Work.

(Yes, I'm still harping on this. This stupid AU has an Important Moral: DON'T TRUST THE PULLOUT METHOD.)

Anyway, JFM does the thing.

The thing where someone tries to bow to you, but you gently lift them out of their bow while looking at them with tenderness and affection.

He assures A-Xian that he is not angry, and he was not yelled at by any Lan elders.

(Aside from LQR, the Lan elders do not yell! They simply look at you like you're something filthy they found stuck to the bottom of their shoe.

But JFM is a big boy, and he has been in politics for a long time. He can deal with that. So he doesn't mention that part to A-Xian.)

He admits that the Lan elders were...annoyed. They're not too happy about the pregnancy. But they have approved of the marriage, and the Jiang sect has agreed.

They are currently busy trying to negotiate the final details of the marriage contract. The wedding will be held ASAP.

All the tension immediately floods out of WWX's body.

He was scared, that's all. He didn't want to talk to anyone about this, not even Shijie. But he was really scared.

What if the Lan decided he wasn't good enough for Lan Zhan?

He's only the son of a servant, after all. And Lan Zhan is...Lan Zhan.

What if they decided he wasn't good enough to be Lan Zhan's husband?

What if they sent him away? What if they made Lan Zhan marry someone else instead?

Or worse yet: what if they took the baby away from Lan Zhan?

What if the elders decided they were too young to be parents? What if they took the baby away and arranged for it to be raised by someone else? What if WWX was never even allowed to see his baby, much less claim it?

WWX doesn't know what he would've done then.

If Lan Zhan wanted to run away with him, WWX would have done that!

But that plan was really no good. They'd have to leave their family behind, and struggle along as rogue cultivators.

They wouldn't have any money or a home. WWX would try his best to take care of Lan Zhan and the baby. But they might not have everything they need.

They certainly wouldn't have all the things they deserve!

So WWX was hoping they wouldn't have to resort to running away.

LXC seemed to think it would be okay. He implied that he approved of the marriage, and that the two of them wouldn't be separated for long.

Just for a bit. Just so the elders could calm down and the marriage could be arranged.

But WWX was starting to get scared.

So the news that the wedding WILL happen is a big, big relief. WWX is so incredibly relieved, he almost cries.

And that's a relief to JFM, really!

He was taking LXC's word for it that the boys were in love. It wasn't hard to believe. A-Xian's letters certainly mentioned LWJ.

He clearly admired LWJ a great deal, and wrote about him suspiciously often. If they were already besotted with each other, that explained everything.

JFM was hoping it was true. That A-Xian was really in love with this boy, really wanted to marry him.

But even if he wasn't in love, they would have to marry anyway.

There wasn't really any alternative. A-Xian had to Take Responsibility, even if he wasn't in love. Even if his wedding and marriage were a source of dread.

But that is clearly not the case.

A-Xian immediately looks terribly relieved, and then delighted. He looks as if a tremendous weight has just slid off his shoulders.

Ah, JFM thinks. It is love, then. Good.

He never wanted any of his children to be forced into a marriage against their will.

He had that kind of marriage himself, and he knows it was not an ideal arrangement.

If he hadn't been sect leader, he might have remained unmarried forever after CSSR left Lotus Pier.

But he was sect leader.

And in the end, the elders made the decision for him. The day finally arrived when his aunts and uncles sat him down, and told him they had started marriage talks with the Yu sect.

The Jiang sect leader, they said, must marry. He must have children.

And there was Yu Ziyuan, they said.

A kunze. A famous beauty. One of the most powerful cultivators of her generation. She was much sought-after as a marriage partner.

The alliance would be a good one. The Jiangs and the Yus had much to offer each other.

They had not been making an idle suggestion. JFM knew that. They had been telling him that they'd chosen his wife, and they had began to make arrangements. He was not in a position to refuse.

What could he do, in the end?

He married her.

They had children. They had a son who developed a powerful golden core, and could serve as the Jiang heir.

They had a daughter whose core was not powerful enough for sect leadership, but who could forge a marriage alliance of her own.

The elders had been satisfied. JFM tried to be satisfied too. His children were good and smart and hardworking, and he was proud.

But he wanted better for the children than a loveless marriage full of frustration and resentment.

His wife had her heart set on marrying A-Li to the Jin heir. JFM hadn't liked that at all. But by the time he caught wind of the plan, it was already too late.

His wife had already approached the boy's parents, and secured their approval. She had presented the betrothal offer to JFM in triumph, knowing she had won.

He couldn't refuse then, not without stirring up conflict with the Jins. So he had agreed with a heavy heart.

But he wanted something different for his son, and for A-Xian. He wanted them to choose the own spouse. If they couldn't marry for love, at least they should marry for companionship. For the sake of affection and friendship.

A-Xian is glowing, though. He's absolutely beaming over the news of the upcoming wedding.

So he must be marrying for all of it. For love, for friendship, for affection.

That's all right, then. JFM's heart is full.

He pats A-Xian on the shoulder.

"Now," he says. "I don't know Second Young Master Lan too well!"

He doesn't know the boy at all, really. He's seen him once, at a banquet. They have never spoken.

By reputation, he understands that the boy is exceptionally proper and upstanding. Regimented and disciplined in everything he does.

He would not have thought LWJ was the kind of person to catch A-Xian's eye. But they do say opposites attract.

"So why don't you tell me a bit more about him?"

JFM finds he doesn't need to say anything more. A-Xian is off and running. He provides an exhaustive list of information about Second Young Master Lan.

JFM learns the boy's favorite foods and favorite color. He discovers that the boy is partial to rabbits. (As pets, A-Xian explains. Definitely not to as something to eat!)

He learns about the boy's favorite books, favorite poems, favorite shops in Caiyi Town.

JFM smiles. He leans back in his chair, and he lets A-Xian's happy chatter wash over him.

(Pausing for now! Will return sometime soon, hopefully with the wangxian reunion!)

...Okay, we're not at the wangxian reunion yet. But hey, let's check up on LWJ!

So back to LWJ, still shut up in the Jingshi.

He's actually doing pretty well! He's optimistic that he will be set free very soon.

LWJ knows his brother, is the thing.

And both of the Twin Jades have intense Trauma over concepts like, "People being imprisoned against their will somewhere in Cloud Recesses."

LWJ also knows that his brother will not allow anyone to remove the baby from LWJ's custody. Nobody will take the baby away from LWJ if he wants to keep it. He knows his brother won't stand for that.

And he's right!

That isn't happening!

Not even over LXC's dead body!

If necessary, LXC will RESURRECT himself to prevent the Lan elders from taking his brother's baby away!

It simply isn't gonna happen. LXC will Fight You if you try that.

So LWJ hasn't been struggling with the same fears WWX has.

He knows he won't get kicked out of the clan, and he knows he won't be imprisoned forever. He knows he gets to keep his baby.

He just has to be patient for now, and wait for his brother to smooth things over.

LWJ does feel genuinely bad for causing so much trouble for his family.

But now that he's had time to adjust to the idea of being pregnant...he isn't sorry, exactly.

He isn't sorry that he gets to marry Wei Ying. He isn't sorry that he gets to have a baby with Wei Ying.

He's sorry that his family is stressed out, cleaning up his mess. And he's a little bit sorry that they'll have to deal with Unpleasant Gossip, once the pregnancy becomes known.

But for his own part, LWJ does not care about gossip.

People can say what they like. He knows the truth about his relationship with Wei Ying, and he will treasure his baby. Other people's ignorant opinions don't matter.

He's quite invested in his pregnancy, too! He has to stay inside, and he's not allowed to do any cultivation work. So he has a lot of time on his hands.

It doesn't take long to complete his daily allotment of Copying The Rules.

Once that's done, he's free to read those pregnancy and parenting texts. He's taking copious notes and making lists. He's on the job!

He doesn't quite feel pregnant yet, aside from the nausea. But his qi has been slightly off, which is presumably why he's not supposed to use his sword or his guqin for cultivation work.

LWJ likes to think that's the baby, trying to make itself known.

He spends a lot of time in meditation, poking around inside his own body. He tries to check up on the baby several times a day, just to say hello.

He doesn't know if the baby can feel those little touches at all. But the physician says he's doing well.

The pregnancy is progressing as it should. She says that he'll start to feel movement soon enough, little kicks and wriggling.

LWJ is excited about that. But he misses Wei Ying very much.

He would like Wei Ying to be here for this.

Wei Ying hasn't missed anything, of course. Nothing has really happened yet. He can't feel anything yet, and he doesn't look pregnant.

But he wishes that Wei Ying were here.

His brother promises that everything is nearly sorted out. The Jiangs have agreed to the marriage, and the preparations are underway. The wedding date has been chosen.

But the elders decided they needed time to make arrangements and send out invitations.

They are trying very hard to give this marriage an air of normalcy. LWJ knows that.

...He also knows that it won't work.

He and Wei Ying weren't even formally betrothed before this.

A rushed wedding between two seventeen-year-olds who were strangers six months ago? There's only one possible reason for THAT.

But his brother says that it's still important to behave as if this is a normal marriage, arranged for political reasons.

If they do that, everyone else will play along. It's only polite, after all.

And he says that everyone has a sibling or a cousin who's had this kind of marriage. People might gossip in private. But they won't be rude to LWJ or to the baby.

He didn't promise that people wouldn't be rude to Wei Ying. LWJ noticed, and he didn't like that.

It's all right, though. If anyone is rude to his husband, LWJ will handle that. It's his right to defend Wei Ying.

If anyone makes crass remarks about how he "trapped" one of the Twin Jades, well.

LWJ will set those people straight.

The wedding will be very lavish, though. LWJ isn't involved in the preparations, but he knows that it will be a formal affair.

Uncle has recovered enough to leave his bed. According to LXC, he's arranging every detail of the wedding with a grim sort of determination.

He doesn't approve of the match. But he won't have their sect embarrassed further.

So he says they cannot host a cheap, miserly affair. There must be a nine-course banquet, reams of red silk, and all the trimmings.

The merchants in Caiyi Town are apparently supplying everything they need. Sect Leader Jiang is sending over supplies, too.

Lady Jiang is helping to plan the banquet, and everyone is rushing here and there.

But LWJ isn't allowed to do much, and neither is Wei Ying.

And apparently, they are not going to be allowed to see each other until the wedding.

LWJ doesn't see the sense in that. If he's already expecting, if everyone will soon be AWARE that he's expecting, then what does it really matter?

But his brother just sighed and told him to be patient for now.

So LWJ is trying to bear with it, for his brother's sake. He's trying not to cause anymore trouble for his brother.

...It's very hard though.

He has letters and drawings from Wei Ying every day. LWJ keeps them in a box beneath his bed and he rereads them often. He's grateful for the correspondence.

It's just not the same thing as having Wei Ying.

He must be brave, though. He must be patient. He must bear with the separation, secure in the knowledge that soon they'll be together for the rest of their lives.

His brother has sorted things out with Sect Leader Jiang. Officially, Wei Ying will marry into the Lan sect. The baby will take the Lan surname, and be recorded in the Lan family registry.

But they'll spend the autumn in Lotus Pier, for the harvest. Then they'll return to Lotus Pier in the spring for the planting.

Wei Ying will have to give up his position as the Jiang first disciple, though. LWJ is sorry about that.

Still, they'll be in Lotus Pier for part of the year. That means that Wei Ying can continue to train and night-hunt with the Jiang disciples.

He's promised to introduce LWJ to everyone, and show LWJ around the markets.

They'll go to all Wei Ying's favorite spots: the hidden coves of the lotus lakes and the little streams that feed into the mangrove forests.

LWJ is looking forward to it very much. But his brother says he can't even think of traveling until the baby comes.

He'll have to wait until the baby's hundred-day party, in fact.

But that's all right. LWJ has counted it out carefully. The baby's hundred-day party will coincide with the beginning of the next year's lotus harvest.

They'll have the party, then travel to Lotus Pier for the autumn. Wei Ying can show off the baby to Jiang disciples, and to the grannies in the marketplace who apparently give him free food.

LWJ has lots of plans for the future, and he's very happy when he thinks of them.

He's made a new friend, too.

...Well, she's not a friend, really. She's family. His second cousin's wife.

LWJ knew her before, a bit. But she's twelve years his senior, so they didn't spend much time together.

But she's expecting her first child too, so she came to see him.

He's supposed to be secluded from others, but the elders allowed these visits. They thought it would be best if someone older and wiser helped LWJ prepare for his baby.

She's been very helpful. She has tips for how to treat morning sickness, and patterns for making baby clothes.

She's only a bit farther along than he is, and she's happy that her baby will have a playmate.

She isn't a bit haughty or unkind about the nature of his pregnancy, either

In fact, she said that if she could've talked her husband into going to bed with her before the wedding night, she would have done it.

But he was too afraid of being punished by Uncle and the elders, so he refused.

She said she's glad LWJ was too brave to be cowed by some "stodgy old elders."

Clearly, she meant it as a compliment.

LWJ was shocked, but rather delighted by her brazenness.

He thinks she'll get along well with Wei Ying, and he's looking forward to introducing them.

She says she also wants to meet the young man who managed to sweep one of the Twin Jades off his feet.

But Wei Ying is also supposed to be secluded, and he's not allowed to mingle with anyone at the moment. LWJ frowns whenever he thinks of that.

Wei Ying has the Jiangs, of course. Lady Jiang and Jiang Wanyin are still here, and they will remain at Cloud Recesses for two months.

Sect Leader Jiang has returned home, but he'll be back soon to help finish the wedding preparations. And Wei Ying's letters say that Nie Huaisang has been supporting him, too.

So Wei Ying isn't alone. But he isn't with LWJ, either.

LWJ sighs.

He pushes aside the baby clothes pattern that Huang Miaoling gave him. If he isn't copying his lines or reading the texts his brother assigned, he's supposed to be preparing for the baby.

But there's still plenty of time for that.

He settles himself behind his guqin instead.

The physician has told him not to place any strain upon his cultivation base during pregnancy. But there's nothing wrong with simply playing music.

And there's a song LWJ has been working on. It's for Wei Ying. A wedding present, perhaps.

There will be other wedding presents, arranged by the elders. Wei Ying will receive clothes and jewelry and household items. The Jiangs will give presents to LWJ, too.

But those don't count. Those are only gifts symbolizing a union between two clans. LWJ wants to provide Wei Ying with something that's just for him.

He's half-finished with the composition already. He hums it to himself day and night, refining the melody.

He thinks their baby can probably hear him, and he likes that.

Wei Ying must hear the song, too. As soon as possible.

Fortunately, the wedding is only a week away. Even if they're not allowed to see each other until the wedding night, LWJ won't have to wait much longer.

They'll be reunited soon.

So Lan Wangji strums his fingers over the strings and picks out the right notes. Then he sings the melody aloud to his child.

(Awright! Gonna put this on pause for a few days so I can wrap up the next chapter of 'love, in fire and blood'. Hang tight!

Also, in case you're wondering, Huang Miaoling is obviously LJY's mom. He is the bun cooking in that particular oven!)

(thread got borked. it's continued here:

https://twitter.com/cicerfics/status/1359996134089887747

)

ICYMI, continued here:

https://twitter.com/cicerfics/status/1359975784912351233

....I'm sorry, but I cannot keep my sticky little fingers off this AU for even a single day!

I need to write about LQR and LWJ's relationship because. 🥺 I care them. 🥺

Also, I continue to live my 'LWJ is the spoiled babie of the Lan family' truth!

I do not apologize for this! I am right and I should say it!!

So it's two days before the Wangxian Wedding, and LQR is busy with the final preparations.

He is not a happy camper.

He's had almost two weeks to absorb the news of his nephew's pregnancy. But he still hasn't managed to cycle through all five stages of grief.

He's past Denial and Bargaining, yes. But he's still pingponging between Anger and Depression.

Half the time, he's furious with everybody. He's furious with Wei Wuxian, of course. And he's decided that the entire Jiang clan is responsible for failing to raise the boy properly!

He's equally furious with Cangse Sanren, for producing a child who turned out to be so much like her.

This anger isn't very fruitful, though, seeing as the woman has been dead for a decade.

And the Jiangs are trying to make amends.

They haven't stinted on the wedding expenses. The terms of the marriage are considerably more generous than LQR expected.

Wei Wuxian isn't Sect Leader Jiang's son, true. But you wouldn't know that from the size of the marriage payment.

Or from JFM's genuine enthusiasm over the marriage, or his obvious desire to have the child partly raised in Lotus Pier.

So being angry at the Jiangs isn't useful or productive.

And LQR can't vent his anger at Wei Wuxian, because LXC isn't letting him speak to the boy!

Technically, his nephew has no right to forbid such a thing. LQR is his elder, and may speak to whomever he likes.

But LXC has a streak of stubbornness in him, and he always chooses to dig in his heels at the most unfortunate moments.

He's certainly dug in his heels over this.

He said that it won't help anyone if LQR storms and rages at Wei Wuxian. The boy is marrying into their clan, so they have to try to get along with him.

Do not argue with your family, LXC quoted. For it doesn't matter who wins.

If his uncle isn't ready to welcome the boy with open arms, that is his choice. But if that's the case, it's best if he and Wei Wuxian don't speak at all.

LQR couldn't argue with that.

As if to sharpen the blade, LXC added that Wangji would surely be upset if he heard of a quarrel between his uncle and his fiancé.

LXC hinted that Wangji's health must remain their most important priority. Wangji must be spared any conflict or emotional strain.

For the child's sake, if nothing else! Negative emotions were harmful for developing children. Whatever LQR might feel toward the child's father, the child itself was innocent and must be protected.

LQR couldn't argue with that, either.

But he still can't make sense of any of this.

He can't imagine Wangji having a child. He simply can't. Wangji is a child himself. It seems like only yesterday the physicians placed him into LQR's arms.

He and LXC were both plump, sturdy children. They were beautiful, even as newborns, and their personalities were already on full display.

LXC had opened his eyes at once. He peered around the room curiously, and he stared at his uncle.

He had been a quiet baby, very interested in examining his surroundings and the people who came to visit him. He endured any disagreeable circumstances, such as a soiled diaper, quite patiently. He seldom cried or fussed.

Wangji had been quite different.

He was fussy as a newborn. The room was too hot, or too cold. His blankets were wrapped too tightly, or not tightly enough. He had received too much food, or not enough to satisfy.

As an infant, he always calmed quickly when he was in his mother's arms. But he fussed and wriggled with everyone else, even his brother or his uncle.

Slowly, he had gotten over that. As soon as he could walk, he trailed his brother everywhere. He was not happy if LXC was out of his sight for even five minutes.

If LXC had to leave for his lessons, Wangji attached himself to LQR's side. He clung to his uncle's sash and followed him around as he went about his business.

The elders had tried to discourage that sort of thing. They believed that Wangji ought to stay in the nursery, where he wouldn't be in the way.

But for the first time in his life, LQR had defied the opinions of his colleagues.

He had taken Wangji with him into the library and taught him to read. He had walked Wangji around Cloud Recesses, explaining the role of every object and person they passed.

Wangji had always listened with wide, solemn eyes.

He was a very bright child, even from the start.

But the elders had worried because it took him so long to speak. His first year passed, and then his second and third. Still, Wangji refused to utter a single word.

The elders feared that the boy was dimwitted, and they murmured that it was a blessing LXC was the firstborn. At least their future sect leader had not been struck with whatever ailed Qingheng-Jun's second son.

But LQR knew better.

Wangji could read and write better than children twice his age. There was nothing wrong with his hearing, and he understood others' speech perfectly well.

He was an industrious child, too. Always busily working on some inscrutable project.

He had a particular capacity for music. He was adept with his guqin, even as a toddler. He could play simple melodies after hearing them only once.

And he understood cultivation techniques better than any child LQR had ever taught.

He could successfully meditate for hours, even when other children struggled to sit still for an incense stick.

Wangji certainly wasn't stupid, no matter what others might think.

And then, shortly after his fourth birthday, Wangji suddenly began to speak. He talked with a fluency and a vocabulary that staggered the elders, and left his agemates in the dust.

LQR had been triumphant, entirely vindicated in his nephew's brilliance.

As he grew, Wangji had always been clever and capable and hardworking. He was singularly dedicated to his cultivation, and tireless in his efforts to help the common people.

He was a wholly virtuous young man. LQR had never doubted that a bright future lay before him.

...And now here they were.

It was almost Wangji's wedding day. Yet the situation was hardly what LQR had expected when he'd first held that small bundle.

It would be a lavish wedding, yes. There would be a proper alliance with another Great Sect. Wangji's spouse was a gifted cultivator with a strong golden core.

LQR had always expected THAT. But he certainly hadn't anticipated the rest.

To begin, he had supposed that his nephews would not wish to marry until they were twenty-five, or perhaps even thirty.

There was no particular hurry, after all. Their cultivation was very strong indeed. They would enjoy an extended youth. They could certainly afford to wait.

And he'd supposed that they WOULD wait.

He thought he would be growing rather old by the time his nephews chose to marry. And he'd expected that it would take some time to get them properly married.

There would be a lengthy period of negotiations, a betrothal of some years, and several months of planning.

Not this. Not a few days of negotiations, followed by a week and a half of frenetic planning. Not Wangji, married scarcely a month before his seventeenth birthday.

He had resigned himself to the match, by now. There was nothing he could do to stop the marriage, not with a child on the way.

But that didn't mean he had to feign happiness over the situation.

LXC had tried to persuade his uncle toward happiness. He had chosen his weapons well: he pointed out that Wangji was happy.

He said that Wangji was looking forward to his wedding day, and already making plans for his child.

During LXC's visits to his brother, they had evidently begun discussing names and arrangements to furnish the nursery.

Wangji was looking forward to parenthood, LXC said. And he intended to be highly involved in his child's upbringing.

He would not turn the child over to nursemaids and go about his business. He and Wei Wuxian planned to take on even the most tedious chores associated with caring for a newborn.

Slyly, LXC had mentioned that Wei Wuxian was also looking forward to becoming a husband and father.

Wei Wuxian had dutifully completed all his assigned reading on pregnancy and child-rearing. LXC had quizzed him to make sure he paid attention. He was satisfied that the boy had, for once, put considerable effort into his studies.

He was, LXC said, rather horrified once he learned how uncomfortable pregnancy and childbirth could be. Wei Wuxian was very sorry to have put Wangji into this position, but he was determined to do whatever he could to ease Wangji's discomfort.

LXC seemed amused and endeared by this anecdote. But LQR was not appeased.

Of course, Wei Wuxian should be sorry for what he'd done to Wangji! He should be extremely repentant indeed!

But he also should have thought about the consequences of his behavior before he....

Well. Before he did what he did.

LQR did not wish to think of THAT topic any longer. He forced his thoughts down another road, grimly focusing on choosing the tablecloths.

There was still a long list of tasks to complete. He must oversee the tailors as they finished preparing Wangji's new robes.

There were gifts from the Jiang sect to catalog, and letters to write. There was a thousand small household matters to take care of.

LQR, blessedly, wouldn't have to think about preparing the wedding chamber. Wangji had a great aunt who would see to that.

She had five healthy children of her own, and a living spouse. So she would install the marriage bed today and fit it up with new silken sheets.

That was ONE task that LQR wouldn't have to think about.

But there was the hair-combing ceremony tomorrow. LQR couldn't hope to avoid that. He would have to stand in for Wangji's parents, so he would have to be present.

It would be the first time he'd seen or spoke to Wangji since he learned of the pregnancy.

LQR was not looking forward to it.

He was very much afraid that he would weaken.

He ought to remain angry with Wangji, or at least displeased. Wangji had violated their sect's precepts and he'd done something quite disgraceful.

It was chiefly Wei Wuxian's fault, of course!

But LXC had insisted several times that Wangji hadn't been coerced. He had known what he was doing, and he'd agreed to enter into a secret courtship.

He had made his own decisions, LXC said. He had chosen this path.

If that was true, then LQR ought to continue to punish Wangji.

He should make sure that Wangji felt the weight of his offenses, so that Wangji worked hard to correct his faults. He shouldn't give the impression that he was prepared to forgive and forget.

If he did that, Wangji would not learn anything from his mistakes. LQR ought to remain stern and implacable for quite some time.

But it was very difficult to remain angry with Wangji.

As a small child, he had taken reprimands so much to heart. He was so small and earnest, and he was crushed when his family appeared disappointed in him.

Even when he did things he shouldn't, like smuggling pets into Cloud Recesses, LQR found it difficult to impose punishment.

Perhaps, then, this whole mess was his own fault. Perhaps he had failed to raise Wangji properly. Perhaps he had been too indulgent.

And perhaps he had taught Wangji to always expect generous treatment from others. Perhaps he hadn't taught his youngest nephew to watch out for scoundrels who might wish to take advantage of his sheltered upbringing.

LQR sighed.

He directed the servants to take the day's batch of gifts into the banquet hall. Then he signed off on an order for another roast pig from Caiyi Town.

He would have to face Wangji soon enough. He could only delay their meeting for a few more hours.

When they met, LQR must remain firm. He would expect Wangji to apologize for his conduct and try to make amends.

He would not be too quick to accept those apologies either!

He would give Wangji strict rules and regulations for his married life. Wangji would have to conduct himself well, if he expected others to overlook the circumstances of his marriage.

Wangji had always been hardworking and virtuous in the past. But he must double his efforts in order to erase this new stain upon his name.

LQR nodded to himself grimly. He would do it. He would make sure that his nephew understood the gravity of his offenses.

With that, LQR marched off to make the final adjustments to the seating chart.

(Will LQR manage to stay angry with LWJ once they meet face-to-face?)

(More coming soon!

A bump to the top of the thread, for folks who are just tuning in:

https://twitter.com/cicerfics/status/1359280225108938752

)

Possible CW for this section:

LWJ considers/thinks about some pregnancy-related physical changes. Lactation is mentioned.

If you don't want to read this bit, skip the tweets between 'But he's noticed some other changes in his body' and 'LWJ sighs as he rinses himself.'

The day before his wedding, LWJ wakes up quite late. He pads over to the window and peers out at the clear winter sky. Then he lets out a sigh.

He has overslept again.

He didn't intend to. He never had trouble rising at maoshi, not even as a young child. But over the last few days, he's found himself struggle to wake even at chenshi.

The physician says this is to be expected. His body is performing an unusual amount of work, she says. He must expect to feel fatigued.

She reminded him repeatedly that their sect rules are relaxed during pregnancy. He isn't obliged to keep to the usual waking time, not now.

But LWJ tries to maintain his schedule anyway.

A great deal of exceptions have already been made on his behalf. It only seems right to uphold his remaining duties. He doesn't have very many left, after all.

He isn't permitted to go night-hunting with the other disciples. He isn't permitted to attend sword practice. He isn't permitted to help the junior classes practice their spells and talismans.

His only duty now, the physician says, is to care for his own body. He has a duty to nourish the child and give birth safely. Nothing more.

LWJ wishes to fulfill that duty, certainly. It's his highest priority. He thinks of nothing beyond the child...the child, and Wei Ying.

But he's accustomed to a great deal of structure in his life. As the days pass and his list of duties dwindles, he feels increasingly adrift.

He thought it would help to keep to the usual sleeping and waking times. But his body seems to have other ideas.

He finds himself sleeping well past the morning gong, then struggling to stay awake till haishi.

Some days, he cannot manage it. He falls asleep in the midst of meditation sessions.

His brother caught him doing that only yesterday. He came unexpectedly to discuss the final details of the wedding ceremony. It was weishi, and LWJ was supposed to be deep in his afternoon meditation.

But when his brother arrived, LWJ was kneeling by the fire, sound asleep. He had woken abruptly, sleep-rumpled and confused.

It had been quite embarrassing. Yet his brother had only laughed and told him to go back to sleep. He said they could speak another time.

When he isn't sleeping, the nausea comes and goes. His appetite waxes and wanes, changing from one day to the next.

Some days, the very smell of food makes him gag. Other days, he's ravenous. His stomach feels like a bottomless chasm.

The physician says this is normal, too. She says he ought to eat as much as possible on the days when the nausea has ebbed.

A steady supply of dishes appear in his chambers, helping him comply with her orders.

There are garlic broths and steamed sweet potatoes, lotus-seed congee and carp-and-ginger soup.

Lady Jiang cooks much of the food herself. She personally delivers the tray to his chambers, and she sits with him while he eats.

She's always especially pleased on the days when he can manage to keep down a full bowl. She treats LWJ very kindly, and he's grateful for her acceptance.

As he eats, she tells him of her family.

Her brother and parents will be present at the wedding. But LWJ gathers that her mother is none too pleased about the marriage.

He frowns over that.

Lady Jiang hastens to reassure him. Madam Yu is willing to secure an alliance with the Lans, and satisfied with the terms of the contract. She has no personal grudge against LWJ, nor any hard feelings against his family.

But, Lady Jian admits, she is upset with Wei Ying. She blames him for many things, including the pregnancy.

After she leaves, LWJ spends some time scowling at the wall.

He already knows this. The truth lurks behind Wei Ying's descriptions of Lotus Pier: Madam Yu has always resented his presence in her home. She's never welcomed Wei Ying, never appreciated him, never treated him as a proper foster son.

In her eyes, Wei Ying is merely a threat to her own son's inheritance. And, perhaps, he's an unpleasant reminder that her husband once nurtured a certain fondness for another woman.

Wei Ying is too good to complain. He never utters a word against Madam Yu. When he speaks of Lotus Pier, or the years he spent there, he talks of other things.

But LWJ can see the truth. It's hidden behind Wei Ying's uncharacteristic silence.

He speaks tirelessly of Lady Jiang and Jiang Wanyin. He has told LWJ everything about Sect Leader Jiang, his teachers and fellow disciples, and even the man who runs a particularly good noodle stall in the marketplace.

But he does not speak of Madam Yu. Not ever.

LWJ knows what that must mean.

He grits his teeth.

Jiang Wanyin's sour attitude doesn't worry him. Lady Jiang has assured LWJ that her brother is only distressed. He doesn't want to be parted from Wei Ying, or see Wei Ying married into another household.

LWJ can understand that well enough. He would be sorry to lose his brother too, and resentful over his departure. He cannot blame Jiang Wanyin for being unhappy on those grounds.

Besides, Lady Jiang says her brother will come around. She says that he won't be able to resist the temptation to become an uncle. Once the child comes, she promises that her brother will dote upon the baby.

She knows her brother best, and LWJ trusts her judgement. Jiang Wanyin will surely present no problems.

And she says her father is happy about the marriage too, now that he understands it's a love-match.

He was worried at first, she says. But now he understands that Wei Ying loves his husband-to-be. So he's given his hearty approval, and offered no objections whatsoever.

Alone in his bedroom, LWJ gloats over that. Wei Ying's love is a precious treasure, and so is the Jiangs' acceptance.

It makes LWJ feel as though he's gotten away with stealing something. If he thinks about the matter too long, he feels giddy and triumphant.

Madam Yu's hostility toward Wei Ying sours his joy a little. But he has other sources of happiness. He can't dwell upon her for too long, not with so many other things on his mind.

He's started showing. Not much, not yet. But there's a slight swell to his belly that wasn't there before.

Lan Wangji wondered if perhaps he was imagining it. The physician took measurements, though. She confirmed that he has grown since the first time she examined him.

She said she hadn't expected him to show before the third or fourth month. Cultivators with strong core muscles didn't often begin showing before the third month.

But perhaps, because he is still quite young, his body is showing signs earlier.

She didn't seem disturbed, so Lan Wangji didn't trouble himself over this new development.

He enjoys his rounding belly. He likes the visible proof that his child is growing well. He will have something to show Wei Ying, when they are reunited.

He thinks Wei Ying will like this: the proof of their baby's existence, the physical evidence that they have created a life together.

But he's noticed some other changes in his body. LWJ is less certain how Wei Ying will react to those. His chest is sore and tender now. It's started rounding out, too.

It's been like that for a while, in truth. But LWJ didn't notice the change at first.

It wasn't unusual for his chest to become sore just before his monthly cycle. He thought he was just overdue. He thought the swelling would go away as soon as his bleeding came.

But it didn't go away, and his cycle never came. And then he understood that his symptoms had another cause altogether. These changes wouldn't be going away any time soon.

Wei Ying hasn't seen him like this yet. The last time they were together—properly together, their bodies bare before each other—LWJ's chest had only been a little sore and swollen.

Wei Ying hadn't seemed to notice. They only had an hour to spend together, and they were trying to make the most of it.

They had hurried out of their robes. Then Wei Ying's mouth was between LWJ's legs, and he had forgotten about every other concern.

Including the fact that his monthly bleeding was long overdue.

Wei Ying hadn't seemed to notice anything strange. He had been eager to get himself inside LWJ's body. If there had been any visible change in LWJ's chest, Wei Ying hadn't remarked upon it.

But the changes are unmistakable now. There's a swelling and a rounding to his breasts, far beyond what was typical for his usual cycle.

Sometimes, they leak a bit. Lately, LWJ has found it necessary to change his inner robes several times a day.

LWJ frowns over that as he takes his bath.

Of course, he knew that his body would change as the birth approached. He knew that his body produce milk for the child. His brother sent over books from the library, and the books explained all that.

But he thought it would happen much later in the pregnancy.

The books said this sort of thing usually started just a month or two before delivery. He hadn't thought it would happen so soon. He thought he would have more time to prepare for his body to undergo these changes.

He thought Wei Ying would have more time to prepare, too. Now he finds himself cataloging each new change, noting how each part of his body has altered since Wei Ying saw it last.

His hips are a little wider, perhaps. His stomach is a little rounder. His chest looks completely different. And there are the beginnings of stretch marks, scattered across his skin.

LWJ sighs as he rinses himself with pomelo water.

Tomorrow night will be his wedding night. And perhaps it shouldn't be an especially significant event. He and Wei Ying have already done everything that couples do on their wedding nights.

It will not be the first time someone sees his bare body. It will not even be the first time Wei Ying sees his bare body.

But he and Wei Ying will be together again. And LWJ would like for his new husband to enjoy looking upon him, after they both remove their clothes.

He doesn't want Wei Ying to be disappointed once he realizes that LWJ's body is different now. He doesn't want Wei Ying to decide that his body is less appealing than it once was.

LWJ decides not to think of that now.

His uncle will arrive soon for the hair-combing ceremony, along with his brother and great-aunt. He should not mope around the bathroom, thinking of his wedding night, while his family gathers outside.

So he dresses in clean red sleeping robes and dries his hair over the fire. Once he's ready, he joins his family in the main room.

His brother is waiting, and he smiles when he see LWJ. Great Aunt is waiting too.

She purses her lips, examining the plate of offerings. Then she lifts the comb and studies it with a critical eye.

When LWJ appears, she points him to the chair.

But Uncle is not here.

LWJ casts an anxious glance at his brother. He knows that Uncle is angry, and he accepts that he deserves such anger. But he thought that surely Uncle would set aside his anger long enough to participate in the wedding rituals.

Surely he wasn't so angry that he planned to skip the hair-combing ceremony?

But it is nearly the appointed hour, and Uncle is not here. LWJ swallows around a sudden lump in his throat.

He expected that Uncle would be angry once he knew of the pregnancy.

But he thought Uncle would let go of his anger after a time. He thought that once the marriage took place, LWJ's imprudent behavior could be forgiven.

He thought that he and Wei Ying would prove that they planned to take responsibility for the consequences of their actions. Then Uncle would forgive them.

But perhaps this was a foolish expectation. Perhaps it was selfish, too.

Uncle believes so strongly in their sect's strictures. The rules about chastity are especially important to him. Perhaps, to such a man, LWJ's offenses are unforgivable.

Perhaps he will never want to look upon LWJ's face again.

LWJ's heart clenches.

But just as he's given up hope—just as Great Aunt has lit the candles and had LWJ take his bows— the door to the Jingshi slides open.

It is Uncle.

His face is clouded, and he keeps his eyes averted from LWJ.

But he is here.

LWJ nearly gasps with relief. Of course, it's not seemly for him to speak during this ritual. He can't apologize to Uncle now.

Not when Great-Aunt is running the comb through his hair and speaking the blessings.

Her voice is rather sarcastic as she speaks the third blessing: the one wishing him an abundance of children.

LWJ doesn't turn to look at his brother. But he knows his brother is repressing a smile. His cheeks burn. Still, LWJ keeps his head modestly lowered until the ritual is done.

Great Aunt holds out the plate of rice balls, and LWJ eats them slowly.

Today, he hasn't had much nausea. It's a day when he wants to eat and eat, emptying one bowl after another.

It shouldn't be difficult to finish the rice balls, then.

But Uncle's presence makes the food stick in LWJ's throat. He swallows down the last of the rice, and Great Aunt gives him tea. Then the ritual is over.

Nearly over, at any rate. He must sit up and wait until the candles have burned out. Then he will say his final prayers to his late parents, and he will go to bed. There is no need for anyone to remain with him during this portion of the ritual.

But after Great Aunt takes her leave, Uncle lingers.

He's stroking his beard and pacing the floor. It's what he does when he is thinking of what to say, thinking how to reprimand a disciple for their unruly conduct.

LWJ casts an anxious glance at his brother.

But his brother only smiles and squeezes LWJ's shoulders. Then he bows to Uncle, and he's gone.

LWJ sits at the vanity table, mute with anxiety.

Uncle continues to pace restlessly. He hadn't even looked at LWJ yet. He must be very angry indeed. LWJ's heart sinks.

He rises from the chair. Then he sinks to his knees, and bows properly to Uncle.

"Uncle," he begins.

Uncle makes a quiet noise.

He sounds surprised, but LWJ cannot see his face. He's taking care to keep his head lowered, his posture respectful.

There have not been many occasions in his life when he's knelt to his family in repentance. But LWJ has seen other disciples present themselves to the elders for punishment, so he knows what to do. He must kneel and keep his eyes lowered until Uncle gives him permission to rise.

He must show that he understands the consequences of his actions, too. So LWJ takes a deep breath, and he speaks.

"I am sorry for my reckless behavior. I know I have caused trouble for the family."

His brother says he hasn't caused too much trouble. He says the marriage alliance is a good one, and will benefit their sect in the long run.

He says that he would've preferred for LWJ to wait until his wedding night, but he will not punish LWJ for failing to do so.

His brother is kind, though. He is too indulgent. LWJ has caused trouble for uncle and the elders. He knows that. So he must try to make amends.

"In the future, Wei Ying and I will work hard to be a credit to the sect."

LWJ resists the temptation to shift restlessly.

"We will be responsible and prudent. We will not make any other mistakes."

LWJ will indeed be cautious and prudent in the future. He will have a child, and he must set a good example for them. He doesn't want to bring up his child badly.

He also doesn't to behave in a way that taints his child's reputation or prospects.

So he must be more responsible than ever. He must help Wei Ying be responsible too. They must work together to become a model of martial harmony and righteous conduct.

LWJ nods slightly to himself.

"We will...we will have a good marriage."

He takes a deep breath.

"We will raise our children well. We will make Uncle proud."

He can't think what else to say. He tried to plan out a speech for when he saw Uncle again. He has been working on it for some days.

But LWJ suddenly finds he has forgotten every word.

It doesn't matter. Uncle seizes him by his elbows and pulls him off the floor.

When LWJ is settled on his feet, Uncle doesn't draw his hands away. Instead, he squeezes LWJ's arms tightly.

"Wangji," he sighs.

LWJ risks a glance upward. Uncle has a strange expression on his face, one that LWJ can't decipher.

But Uncle squeezes his arms again. Then he reaches up a hand and smooths LWJ's freshly combed hair away from his face.

His thumb brushes against LWJ's cheek. Then he draws his hand back and clears his throat.

"You should get some sleep," he says gruffly.

He hurries away, and the door slides shut behind him. It's an abrupt departure.

But LWJ returns to his bed, a bright shimmering star of happiness inside his chest.

He climbs beneath the sheets and watched as the candles burn lower, lower, lower.

He waits until the last light is snuffed out, the wick sinking in a pool of wax. Then, with a slight smile, he pulls the quilts over his body and shuts his eyes.

(Awright! I'm off to work on editing the next chapter of 'love, in fire and blood'. See you on the flip side!)

Some bonus material for ya:

LQR: I will be so incredibly stern when I see Wangji again. I will make sure he knows he is NOT off the hook.

LWJ: Uncle, I am sorry for my behavior. 🥺

LQR:

Spoiler for the wedding night:

LWJ: Wei Ying, I am sorry that my body has changed and I am no longer attractive. 😔

WWX, staring at his husband's round tummy and chest:

...So, the next part in the story SHOULD be the wedding/wedding night.

But somehow, I'm not feeling that ~vibe~ at the moment. So I've skipped ahead a bit! This snippet takes place two months after the wedding.

All you need to know is that they got married, had a honeymoon at CR, and now they're back in business.

Note: I do intend to format/post this fic on AO3 eventually!

I will tidy up any errors/inconsistencies, and I'll put the various sections in chronological order then.

I think I want to threadfic about four more sections after this one. Then, when I'm done with my other WIP, I'll focus on getting this cleaned up/reformatted!

So: It's January. LWJ is about 18 weeks along.

CW: Some fairly detailed description of pregnancy exams. Also, LWJ spends some time worrying that something is wrong with his pregnancy. But nothing is wrong whatsoever!

On with the show!

As the weather grows cold, LWJ finds himself less inclined to emerge from his bed. His belly is larger each day, and his body feels cumbersome.

He tries to complete his assigned daily stretches, as the physician directed. But once those are finished, it's far more comfortable stay hidden beneath thick quilts.

Wei Ying has no objection to such an arrangement. He's only too happy to spend the day lingering in bed, stroking LWJ's belly and talking to the baby.

But now that the traditional first month of marriage is complete, the elders have many tasks for Wei Ying.

They want him to help the disciples on night hunts. They think he should make copies of the exams the junior class must take. They want him to clear snow off the pathways, run errands between various buildings, and perform any number of chores.

With some indignation, LWJ tells his brother that Wei Ying is being overworked. Surely it isn't necessary for Wei Ying to perform every last chore in Cloud Recesses? Do the elders intend to work him to death?

But his brother only laughs.

He says that Wei Ying has a great deal of natural energy. He must work it off, LXC says, or he will become restless. And if Wei Ying can further appease the elders in the process, so much the better.

Wei Ying doesn't seem to mind staying busy. So LWJ tries to satisfy himself with this arrangement.

But, still. He is much happier when Wei Ying remains in the Jingshi with him.

Fortunately, today is his weekly appointment with the physician. Wei Ying can excuse himself from his chores and linger beside the fire with LWJ.

The physician, when she spots him, sighs heavily.

"It is hardly necessary for YOU to be present for this examination, young master."

She casts a rather pointed look at Wei Ying.

LWJ gives her his flattest stare in return.

"Wei Ying would like to hear what the physician has to say."

He smooths his robes.

"As this is our first child," he adds, "my brother believes we will both benefit from the physician's guidance."

The physician harrumphs. But she doesn't argue.

Perhaps she feels it would be unwise to contradict her sect leader. Or perhaps she simply doesn't want to go through the ordeal of trying to eject Wei Ying from the room.

She tried that during two previous checkups.

Wei Ying whined and begged and protested. He made such a nuisance of himself that the physician finally gave up in despair. She said he could stay, and Wei Ying retreated to LWJ's side in triumph.

LWJ has a vague notion that he ought to discourage this sort of behavior in his new husband. But he wants Wei Ying to be present during his checkups. So he says nothing.

Wei Ying plunks himself happily onto a nearby stool and reaches for LWJ's hand.

The physician sighs. She sets down her bag, seating herself at LWJ's other side.

First, she checks his pulse and tongue.

"No sign of illnesses," she says, releasing his wrist. "I see no indications of qi imbalance or nutritional deficiency."

Wei Ying beams. He squeezes LWJ's hand.

But then, LWJ opens his robes so the physician can measure his belly. At once, the physician frowns.

LWJ feels an involuntary burst of alarm.

"Is something wrong?" he demands.

The physician shakes her head.

Yet she continues to frown at his belly. She does not speak. Instead, she takes measurements and reviews her notes.

"You're larger than I expected," she admits, after an uncomfortable pause. "At first, I thought it was merely because of your age. Younger parents tend to show earlier."

She scratches her chin.

"However, I am looking at your past measurements. You seem to be growing very quickly. Your child appears to be much larger than usual."

That seems like it ought to be good news. But the physician's face is grave.

Wei Ying's hand tightens around LWJ's.

The physician prods his belly, palpating slowly.

She asks if he has felt hungrier than usual, or exceptionally thirsty. Mortifyingly, she wants to know how often he urinates, and how much urine he passes.

LWJ begins to see why husbands are usually not present for these appointments. Still, he answers her questions frankly.

The physician tilts her head in response. She doesn't seem worried, but she does look thoughtful. LWJ swallows hard.

He knows that his stomach is rather large. But he, too, thought it was only because he was a little young for pregnancy.

Many cultivators didn't reach their full stature until the age of twenty. Perhaps his frame simply hadn't reached its full size.

Perhaps that was why his belly seemed so round and heavy, barely halfway through his pregnancy. As long as this rapid growth wasn't a sign of illness, LWJ didn't particularly care what caused it.

Besides, Wei Ying liked his husband's rounding belly. He rubbed LWJ's stomach several times a day. For luck, he said, and so the baby would recognize his scent when it came.

He liked to touch LWJ's belly. He liked to kiss it. He certainly liked to look at it when LWJ was naked. So LWJ had luxuriated in his husband's admiration, and he hadn't troubled himself with the matter.

But as she pokes and prods, the physician's frown deepens.

After a while, she draws back. She folds her hands in her lap, and sits in contemplation for a moment.

"It's a little early for this," she admits, "but let me see if I can hear the heartbeat."

From her bag, she withdraws a peculiar object shaped like a horn. She lays the end flat against LWJ's stomach. Then she puts it to her ear and listens closely, palpating at his wrist.

Wei Ying strokes his shoulders. His fingers twitch restlessly against LWJ's skin.

LWJ wonders if he smells distressed. Wei Ying certainly does. There's an unpleasant acrid edge to his husband's scent, a sharp note of anxiety. It makes LWJ's heart race and his flesh prickle.

The physician pulls away. Her face is still inscrutable, but the line between her brows has disappeared.

"I see," she murmurs.

She almost seems to be talking to herself.

"I'm going to send a thin stream of qi to the womb," she declares. "It is merely an added precaution, to confirm the accuracy of my diagnosis."

But LWJ does not like the sound of that.

He doesn't want a 'diagnosis'.

He has already been told that he's having a child. That is the only diagnosis he wants. If another diagnosis must be made, then surely that means something is wrong with his baby.

He bites the inside of his cheek.

But he nods anyway.

The physician's qi is cool and reassuring as she lets it flow into LWJ's body. Her eyes are narrowed, her face intent. Then, abruptly, she withdraws her qi. She heaves a great sigh.

"As I suspected. There's nothing wrong with your pregnancy." She pinches the bridge of her nose. "You're simply carrying twins."

She sounds rather rueful, as if this isn't entirely welcome news.

But Wei Ying gasps with evident delight.

"Twins! Twins, really? TWO babies?!"

"That is what 'twins' means, yes."

The physician's tone is rather sour. But she heaves another sigh, then packs up her bag. She seems to have finished her examination.

If they are stopping here, that must mean LWJ is healthy. It must mean that his baby is healthy.

But no, not his baby. His BABIES. Two babies, and both healthy.

LWJ clutches his belly with both hands.

Wei Ying grips his shoulders frantically. He's making a long, wavering, high-pitched noise.

He sounds very excited, and LWJ would like to share in his husband's joy. But he's too dumbfounded to speak.

He read a great deal about pregnancy, of course. Everything their library had to offer. But twins were hardly mentioned in any of the texts.

LWJ thought that such births must be exceptionally. After all, he's only known two pairs of twins at Cloud Recesses.

There were a pair of zhongyong girls, just one year younger than LWJ. They shared many of his classes. And two of the elders were also twins: a qianyuan woman and a zhongyong man.

His old classmates were nearly identical. Even the instructors always struggled to tell the young women apart.

But the elders looked nothing alike. A casual observer would hardly have thought they were related at all.

LWJ wonders if his children will be just alike, or wildly different. He wonders what would be best, which option he should hope for.

He can't decide. In fact, he can hardly absorb the news. His head is whirling.

The physician assures them that there's no need for alarm. She admits that poorly-trained midwives might struggle to manage a twin delivery. But the physicians of Cloud Recesses are highly expert.

Their most experienced midwife will be present, she says. This woman has delivered at least four sets of twins during her lifetime. She will know how to assist LWJ, when the time comes.

"I don't foresee any problems," she says, sealing her bag shut. "But carrying twins places an added strain upon your body. So you must be especially cautious with your diet. Avoid physical exertion, and do not engage in any cultivation work."

LWJ sighs. He has already been barred from such activities.

He's allowed nothing more than a short daily walk, weather permitting. Wei Ying walks with him out to the rabbit fields every afternoon. LWJ can do nothing more.

For once, Wei Ying is fully united with Uncle and the elders. No one seems willing to risk LWJ overtiring himself. Everyone is very anxious to ensure that he rests and avoids injury.

But LWJ already knows how to do that. And he knows what foods he is supposed to eat, and which herbs he is meant to take. He has already learned how to care for a single child.

He supposes, blinking dumbly, than a second child can't make much difference.

The physician gives him a gracious nod and takes her leave.

Meanwhile, Wei Ying is vibrating in place. As soon as the door slides shut behind the physician, Wei Ying flings himself to his knees. He buries his face in LWJ's lap.

"Lan Zhan!" he wails. "TWO babies!"

LWJ reaches out to stroke his husband's hair.

"Yes," he says, blankly. "It would seem so."

Wei Ying keeps his face buried in LWJ's lap for a long time. When he lifts it, he's blinking back tears. But he's smiling too.

He wears the same brilliant and irresistible smile that got LWJ into this state in this first place.

"Ah, it doesn't seem fair."

Wei Ying wipes his eyes with his wrist.

"Why did I get so lucky? I would've been happy with one healthy baby! And now there's two?!"

LWJ smiles.

He can't help it. Wei Ying's joy is contagious, and he's right. One healthy child would have been a great blessing. Two healthy children is an embarrassment of riches.

Wei Ying reaches up and tweaks LWJ's nose.

"How did Lan Zhan manage to make two whole babies just for me?" he demands.

As it happens, LWJ is not sure what he did. He's not certain that he could do it again, even if he tried.

Perhaps it was merely a lucky chance, or perhaps Wei Ying is responsible. The elders will likely think so...if they're not pleased by this news, anyway. If they are pleased, then they will give LWJ the credit.

LWJ settles on a factual answer.

"Wei Ying helped," he says.

He certainly couldn't have accomplished any of this without Wei Ying's valuable contributions.

Wei Ying throws his head back and laughs.

"Ah, well. This humble disciple truly did his best!"

He lowers his head with mock gravity. His eyes are dancing.

"But Lan Zhan is doing all the hard work!" he adds.

It certainly is work. LWJ hadn't quite counted on that, somehow.

He knew that childbirth was painful. But naively, he assumed that carrying a child was a relatively straightforward procedure.

The books had corrected this misconception. Then the child—the children—had finished his education.

Carrying children was, indeed, work. It was tiring and nauseating. His back often hurt, and his feet had swollen.

He was inside oftener than he liked, barred from the activities that had always given his life purpose.

But he couldn't be resentful of the children. Not when he's already begun to feel them wriggle and flutter. Not when he knows there are two of them, healthy and growing well.

Not when Wei Ying looks so radiantly happy. LWJ can't regret any of it.

But Wei Ying's smile falters after a moment. He runs a careful hand over LWJ's stomach.

"If there are two, doesn't that mean it'll be harder for you?"

His brow furrows.

"Your back will hurt more as you get bigger. You might get more tired and sore. And then they'll both have to come out at the same time!"

He looks rather horrified at the prospect. LWJ hastens to reassure him.

"The physicians said there is no need to worry," he says firmly. "She is very experienced."

He can't remember ever hearing of a child lost at delivery. Not within Cloud Recesses. Not during his lifetime, at least.

Their physicians are some of the most skilled in the cultivation world. Surely they will make sure his babies stay healthy.

LWJ will make sure, too. He folds his arms around his stomach, and silently urges his children to continue growing well.

It doesn't matter how heavy his belly becomes. So long as the children are strong and sturdy, it will be all worthwhile.

Wei Ying's shoulders sag

"Ah, good." He sighs.

But then, all at once, he freezes.

"Oh, no," he whispers. "What if they look EXACTLY alike? What if they're small and cute, and they look just the same? How will my heart take it?!"

LWJ thinks about that.

"Wei Ying must be strong," he says.

They will both have to be strong. If their children are particularly small and endearing, they will have to be very strong indeed. They will have to protect their children always.

Wei Ying rubs his belly.

"Hey, you two!" He leans in. "Be good in there! Don't you dare start fighting or causing problems! Lan Zhan is working hard to carry you. So be obedient little Lan disciples for him!"

Uncle would say that was too much to hope for. He would say that any child of Wei Ying's was bound to be a troublemaker.

But LWJ merely rests his hand placidly over his husband's.

"They need not be too obedient," he says.

Once, he thought that obedience was the greatest virtue of all. But Wei Ying is certainly not very obedient. He has many virtues, but obedience isn't one of them.

Still, LWJ loves him as he is. If their children were more like Wei Ying than himself, he wouldn't complain.

Wei Ying kisses him. But then he lets out a loud, despairing groan.

"I can't believe we found out JUST after Shijie and Jiang Cheng went home!" He makes a face. "They're going to be so mad they didn't hear this news in person. But I'll write to tell them right away!"

"Do you want to go tell your family?" he adds.

LWJ thinks about that, too.

"Yes."

He rises to his feet. There is no time like the present, and they must hurry if they want to break the news themselves. He knows that the physician has been reporting every detail to the elders.

They locate his brother first. Sect Leader Lan is never difficult to find. At this hour, he's in his private study, answering correspondence.

Under normal circumstances, LWJ would not disturb such an activity. But today, he shows himself in. Wei Ying trails after him.

His brother is surprised to see them. Then, his face turns concerned.

He clearly notes Wei Ying's delighted expression, and his shoulders relax. But as he waves them to sit, he still looks rather anxious.

LWJ shares the news quickly, to avoid inflicting unnecessary suspense.

His brother's eyes light up at once.

"Wangji," he breaths. "Is it certain?"

LWJ nods affirmation.

"The physician performed tests."

At his side, Wei Ying wriggles contentedly.

His brother lets out a soft laugh. Then he studied LWJ's belly, thoughtful and considering.

"I admit, I had wondered. I'm hardly an expert in these matters, but you are a bit bigger than I would have expected!"

LWJ merely nods.

His brother is very polite, of course. He never remarked upon LWJ's size. But he must have noticed it, as LWJ did himself. He noticed it, and held his tongue.

His brother sits back, face bright and contented.

"Well, I'm glad to hear that nothing is wrong," he laughs. "A double blessing!"

He tilts his head.

"We should do something for your birthday!"

LWJ blinks.

His birthday is a week away, but he hadn't even thought of that.

Birthday celebrations are not traditional in his clan, aside from milestone events. He will only be seventeen, and there are no special rituals for that year.

His brother merely shrugs.

"It's an auspicious time," he insists. "We should celebrate a little."

Wei Ying rocks forward eagerly.

"I already have an idea for a birthday surprise! I'll tell you later. Once Lan Zhan has gone down for his nap!"

LWJ gives his husband a quelling look.

It's true that daily naps are now quite necessary for him. But there's no need for Wei Ying to announce such things far and wide! Afternoon naps aren't traditional in his clan, either.

Wei Ying beams, unrepentant.

His brother coughs, transparently striving to conceal a laugh.

"We will certainly speak about your ideas further," he tells Wei Ying solemnly.

Then he turns to LWJ.

"Do you want me to tell Uncle?"

LWJ shakes his head.

He already burdened his brother with telling their uncle of the pregnancy. It would not be right to burden him a second time. Besides, LWJ is not unhappy to share this news.

"Wei Ying and I will tell him ourselves," he says.

Then he motions to Wei Ying to rise.

They will tell him now, in fact. Uncle should be between classes just now. It's a highly suitable time.

As they walk toward Uncle's classroom, Wei Ying mumbles protests to himself.

Wei Yin thinks they should tell Uncle later. He thinks they should have a physician present when they deliver the news. What if Uncle collapses again, and Wei Ying is blamed?!

But LWJ merely waves this concern off.

He and Wei Ying are married now, after all. Uncle already knows they are expecting. This news cannot be THAT shocking. If Uncle collapses again, he's merely being unnecessarily dramatic about the situation. LWJ must pay such theatrics no mind.

They find Uncle in his empty classroom, sorting papers. He frowns when he sees them. Perhaps he intends to lecture LWJ for being out in the cold.

But LWJ plunges into his news as soon as he's finished his greeting.

Wei Ying squirms restlessly at his side. Meanwhile, Uncle goes very still. He does not speak for a long moment.

"I see," he chokes out.

Then he lapses into silence again.

Uncle appears somewhat dumbstruck. But then his eyes fall upon Wei Ying, and his cheeks redden with indignation.

"YOU need not look so pleased with yourself," he tells Wei Ying, sharply.

LWJ sneaks a look at his husband. Wei Ying does look transparently pleased, and perhaps to Uncle's eyes he appears smug. But LWJ knows better.

Sure enough, Wei Ying shakes his head vigorously.

"Uncle!" he cries pitifully. "How can I be pleased with myself? This is all due to Lan Zhan's hard work! He deserves all the credit."

Wei Ying flashes an amused, affectionate glance at LWJ.

Then Wei Ying rocks forward.

"But I am pleased, though! Is that so wrong?"

He gives Uncle a pleading stare.

"There will be another generation of Twin Jades! Isn't that something to celebrate? Won't everyone in Cloud Recesses be pleased about that?"

LWJ hadn't even thought of that. His heart warms.

It would be very nice indeed. He hopes his children will be close, as close as LWJ always was to his own brother.

Perhaps they will be even closer? If they're truly twins, it might be possible. They'll be united always.

LQR is quiet for a long moment. Then he huffs.

"So long as the children are born healthy and there are no complications for Wangji, the elders will be...gratified."

The words are cool and dispassionate enough. But his tone is much warmer than it was before.

In fact, his eyes are warmer than at any point since he learned of his nephew's pregnancy.

He stares at LWJ's belly. There is a strange expression upon his face. LWJ doesn't quite know how to interpret it.

Uncle clears his throat. He swallows hard.

"You must be exceptionally careful with your health," he says softly.

LWJ lowers his head.

"I will be."

He has no intent to do otherwise.

Nor does he have any opportunity to endanger himself. The entire population of Cloud Recesses has conspired to keep him shut up in the Jingshi, drowning in soup and blankets. His own husband has aided and abetted these efforts.

But Uncle is not satisfied with this assurance. He plunges into a lengthy lecture about what LWJ must to do ensure a healthy pregnancy.

LWJ knows all this information already, of course. But he listens tolerantly. It is his duty to listen to his Uncle, of course.

But also...

It's the first time in weeks that Uncle has lectured him in such a way. Not lecturing merely for form's sake, or out of habit, or as a reprimand.

Today, Uncle's voice is terribly earnest. He sounds as if he's determined to impress the importance of this topic upon his nephew.

So LWJ folds his hands, and nods patiently.

After a while, Uncle rounds upon Wei Ying.

The babies must not have a noisy, stressful, or disruptive environment, he says. They require calm and serenity. Only then can they develop properly.

Uncle looks as if he believes this feat is entirely beyond Wei Ying's abilities.

"Wangji will also need additional support," he adds. "It is your duty to help him with whatever he requires."

He looks as if he doesn't think Wei Ying is up to this task, either.

"Wei Ying has been very supportive," LWJ insists.

He has. Wei Ying is entirely sympathetic and supportive. He always fetches LWJ whatever he might require, often before LWJ thinks to ask for it.

If they must be parted for a few hours, as Wei Ying tends to his duties elsewhere, Wei Ying always brings back a present.

Sometimes it's something from Caiyi Town. Other times, it's something he made himself: a paper cutting, a love-knot, a drawing.

If nothing else is available, he brings something from outside: a branch with bright red berries, or a small rock that somehow looks like a frog.

But there is always some gift. Something to let LWJ know that his husband was thinking of him.

Uncle doesn't understand this.

But Uncle huffs, and he doesn't argue the matter further.

"It is too cold for you to be outside," he mutters. "Return home quickly."

It's a valuable suggestion, so they scurry off.

Once they're back inside the Jingshi, LWJ sinks on the bed. His feet are aching, even from the short walk. It's a relief to sit once more.

Wei Ying drops down beside him. He rests his forehead against LWJ's shoulder. Then he lets out a long sigh.

LWJ turns to peer into his face.

"Wei Ying? What's wrong?"

Wei Ying presses his forehead harder against LWJ's shoulder. His voice, when it comes, is muffled.

"I feel bad," he mumbles.

LWJ straightens.

"Why?" he demands.

Wei Ying is silent. LWJ waits, counting off his heartbeats. Then, after a suitable interval has passed, he presses the matter.

"It is right to share your troubles with your spouse," he hints.

Wei Ying makes a soft, frustrated sound.

"I don't have any troubles!" he cries. "That's the problem!"

LWJ blinks. He can't make sense of that statement, particularly since Wei Ying uttered it in such a distraught tone.

Wei Ying hunches his shoulders and ducks his head. He's avoiding LWJ's eyes.

"I get to be married to you, and that's nice."

He bumps his shoulder against LWJ's.

"I miss Lotus Pier, but I know we'll go back soon. We'll visit a lot, and Shijie and Jiang Cheng will visit us."

He digs a toe against the soft wood floorboards.

"And the elders are trying to make me copy texts until my hand falls off, but even that isn't so bad. I get to go on night-hunts and help people in the villages. That part is good."

He leans heavily against LWJ's side.

"And then I get to come home to you and our babies. And that part is the best!"

He shrugs, miserably.

"But I know the elders are still kind of mad at me. Madam Yu is still mad at me. People think we did something wrong. Or at least, people think I did something wrong."

Wei Ying's face grows pinched.

"They think I tricked YOU into doing something wrong."

LWJ opens his mouth to protest, but Wei Ying plunges on.

"But I'm happy. I'm so happy all the time!"

"Why shouldn't you be happy?" LWJ demands, sharply.

He turns. He catches his husband's face in his hands. He forces Wei Ying to meet his eyes.

"Wei Ying. Do not waste time thinking of what others may say. Their opinions do not matter."

The rules against gossip went in two directions, after all.

People should not gossip. But they also should not listen to gossip. They shouldn't take foul rumors into their mind, allowing the ignorant opinions of others to poison their own thoughts.

He strokes his fingers over Wei Ying's cheeks, and tries to communicate this silently.

Wei Ying's mouth drops open. He falters for a moment.

"Well, but..." His mouth opens and closes.

Slowly, his hands reach out, cradling LWJ's belly.

"I put two whole babies in you!" he cries. "And now you have to carry them around for MONTHS. And then you have to push them out!"

LWJ rests his hands on Wei Ying's.

"I'm not stupid," Wei Ying adds hurriedly. "I know that part will probably hurt! It's a lot of trouble and nuisance for you. And I'm just...greedy."

He sinks down, resting his cheek against the curve of LWJ's stomach.

"I'm just a greedy person who's excited to get two babies," he says, unhappily. "When we heard the news, I was so happy. I didn't even think about how hard it's going to be for Lan Zhan."

LWJ rubs his husband's back.

"I am also greedy," he says. "I also did not think of such things. I am still not thinking of such things, even now."

He doesn't care, that's all. He simply doesn't care.

Uncle would be horrified, of course. He would say that LWJ learned nothing from this whole business. If he hasn't learned how to be more prudent and forward-thinking by now, perhaps he's beyond hope.

But LWJ doesn't care.

He doesn't care how much trouble and nuisance the pregnancy brings. He doesn't care if the labor is grueling. He doesn't even care if their children are mischievous and reckless and terrible at following the rules.

They will be his children, and so they will be worth anything.

They will be worth EVERYTHING.

He tells Wei Ying so.

And that, at least, makes Wei Ying smile.

Wei Ying curls around his stomach like a dragon protecting a precious treasure. He rubs his cheek on LWJ's belly, and LWJ strokes his hair.

And for today, it's enough.

(Pausing for now! Will be back sometime in the future, but I'm not sure when. Maybe Sunday/Monday?

Be good until then, and remember: 🍆THE PULLOUT METHOD DOESN'T WORK!🍆)

A bump to the top of the thread, in case you just tuned in!

https://twitter.com/cicerfics/status/1359280225108938752