7 toxic things that emotionally mature people never do

(Lookout for these red flags. They will help you will dodge an unhappy relationship.)

///THREAD\\\
1) Emotionally immature people are obsessed with themselves.

This obsession is different from self-love.

It resembles how someone with chronic pain remains preoccupied with themselves.
They don't self-reflect.

So they never gain any self-understanding or insights.

They are doomed to repeat their failings of the past.
2) Emotionally immature people find it difficult to empathize.

They are out of touch with their own feelings.

So they remain oblivious to how they make others feel.

Even when they are able to read emotions, they can't resonate with them.
Exceptions - sociopaths and deep narcissists.

They excel at reading other’s emotions.

They can mimic empathy.

But in their hands, it's a tool to manipulate.

They listen and probe you in order to find your weaknesses to play on.
3) Emotionally immature people have thoughts resembling a woolly mammoth stuck in Siberian Permafrost.

Stiff and rigid.

Once they form an opinion their minds are closed.

They can only think in binaries.

Black or white. True or false.

Right or wrong.
4) They are prone to fly off the handle.

You never know when something will get under their paper-thin skin.

Without any warning, they can launch themselves upon you like the Tasmanian Devil from The Looney Tunes.
They never chew on questions like:

“Did they really mean that?”

“Maybe I’m too quick to assume offense?”

No. They make a judgement on the fly.

Then they become stubborn and defend it.

They use coping mechanisms that deny, distort, or replace reality.
5) They find it hard to admit mistakes. They resort to pointing fingers.

When fingers are pointed at them, they feel anxious to shift the blame to someone else.

They don’t express gratitude.

So they are fed up with everyone and everything.
6) Emotionally immature people resort to sulking, raging, or stonewalling when they try to convey their disappointment.

They either choose passive-aggressive hints.

Or they act out and create a scene.

Or they put up a wall and ice you out.
7) They treat criticism as the 5-year-old treats her broccoli.

They hate it.

They assume that anyone criticizing them is either trying to humiliate them or is making a mistake.

They are quick to don their armor. They deny that there was ever a problem.
Look out for these red flags.

They will help you will dodge the traps of an unhappy relationship.

But wait…

What if you see a couple of traits in yourself?

Should you be dejected? Is there no hope? Are you doomed?
No.

That only means you are human.

You and I and everyone else, we all have room for growth and improvement.

Now you know where you can improve.
If you liked this thread, then perhaps you would like the full article:

resilienthuman.me/emotionally-im…

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More from @dResilientHuman

14 Apr
Trying to please everyone never works.

Here are 7 terrible prices you pay if you try to please everyone.

///THREAD\\\
But what’s so bad about pleasing other people?

We all look out for each other, and the world becomes a gratifying place, right?

Wrong.

Pleasing people is not about helping others.

It's about striving for their acceptance.
Everyone tries to win other's approval.

That is perfectly normal social behavior.

Unless it becomes the sole motive of every interaction.

When you worry that others will get upset with you.

You fear that you will say the wrong thing and lose your face forever.
Read 16 tweets
15 Jun 20
"What's the use of P.A.R.A (by @fortelabs) if it takes this much time to decide where my research content goes?"

This was the question that led me to introspection and a deep dive back into PARA.

The answer was not pretty. Here's where I went wrong:

<thread>
* did not create enough Projects and crammed stuff into Areas instead.

* did not delete unneeded notes while moving a Project to Archive.

* followed only the Projects -> Archive flow. I never utilized any other primary category flows

* didn't do weekly reviews

1/
* became an information hoarder. I obsessed over a storing hierarchy, and introduced hierarchical tags that cluttered up my PKM real estate.

*wasn't intentional enough while taking notes.

*didn't make quick associations with an Area while creating a Project

2/
Read 7 tweets

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