thinking about how in March 1945, Patton launched a large scale attack on a German POW camp for the sole purpose of freeing his captured son in law
the task force was immediately detected by the Germans. it made it to the camp, however, where it accidentally killed a bunch of Serbian POWs because they wore grey uniforms. the German commandant called for a truce and sent the son in law, John K Waters, out to negotiate
he was then immediately shot in the ass by a German guard
the Americans liberated the camp and then realised they didn’t have enough transport, so only O-4s and above got to ride out and everyone else could try and run after them the 50 miles back to American lines. Waters was left behind, ass-shot
on the way back they were ambushed by German infantry, who destroyed the lead tank and then used its radio to call more in in English. the task force commander was then shot in the dick
eventually they surrendered and were just marched straight back to the camp they had left
both of them were then freed from the same hospital nine days later
Patton tried to give the commander who got shot in the dick the Medal of Honor but then realised someone would actually check what he got it for, so settled for personally awarding him the DSC
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I think mostly when I steal valour I just feel like it’s stuff that I could have done, and possibly would have done, were it not for being a mentally ill transsexual
like I wouldn’t start putting on campaign ribbons or whatever, but with the best will in the world there are a lot of army captains and they’re not all exemplary
I mean I also irritate everyone around me by demanding to dress up as a full admiral but I generally get away with it by the helpful expedient of not being a paedophile
there was a paratrooper in the 101st airborne who got shot across the ass while lying on his stomach, such that he got four bullet wounds - entry into one cheek, exit, entry into the other, exit again
plus of course the fine tradition of British weirdos
I remember an interview with a German machine gunner on one of the British D-Day beaches, where he said ‘we saw a guy marching up and down playing the bagpipes, so none of us shot him because we assumed he had gone mad’
advice ‘dress for the job you want’ somewhat less practical when the job you want is ‘diensteinheit IX team leader’
I think about D9 a lot because due to the way German reunification worked the vopos got absorbed into the new state in a fairly orderly way, so for a good few years in the 90s all the police tactical guys in the east wore strichtarn and carried AKs and Makarovs
I actually own another relic of that period - the BePo, the riot police, kept their old patches but with the DDR arms (left) replaced with a roundel so everyone got the message who was in charge