Take an @awscloud survey and receive $50 in credits? That'll pay for the better part of a Managed NAT Gateway! It's threadin' time...
It's never reassuring when your cloud provider greets you with a "who're you, again?"
"How familiar with our nonsense are you?"
Oh so very, very familiar.
“Customers are always beautifully, wonderfully dissatisfied, even when they report being happy and business is great.” — Jeff Bezos
If you're going to ask me a question, the least I can do is answer honestly.
Ever notice that the @awscloud bill only ever goes one direction?
I have used all of these and oh so many more over the past three months. I will choose to rep Route 53.
I know how Thought Leadership works.
Tell me you phoned in your survey creation without telling me you phoned in your survey creation.
I do love the Cognito team members I've met, but I'm sorry: your service is Quite Bad. Real friends stab you in the front.
If I didn't want to talk to @awscloud people I've made some terrible career decisions.
We're 10-12ish. It's hard to keep track some days.
"You have no idea how services companies work, do you..."
I don't know how, but somehow I read this question as condescending.
My role is always "Other." It's the only thing that makes sense / is honest.
I've not heard of Render before. This is a weird marketing campaign for them but I dig it.
I guess *technically* I have final say, but I don't exactly hire people here to overrule their judgement, y'know?
They have so many options for what kind of company I am it doesn't fit in a screenshot. "Media and Entertainment" but almost certainly not the kind they're thinking of.
I could have sworn I was already on their Customer Council, but sure; I'll sign up again so I can get two meals at the events.
And it blew me out to the customer council and ended the survey.
I better get my $50 gift card!
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
Today's cloud marketing story is called "The Tale of Hot Rebecca," and is a truthful recounting of dinner last night.
Strap in; it's a fun ride.
Back in my early 20s, I had a number of friends / acquaintances in my (primarily Jewish) social circle named "Rebecca." It was kind of a problem.
("Can't we spray for them?"
"…not since the 1940s.")
So every Rebecca got an adjective, much like the seven dwarves. One of them asked me once what her adjective was, and I responded in a fit of unadulterated honesty, "you're Hot Rebecca" because honestly? Damn.
Made it to the #GoogleCloudNext keynote seating finally. Let's see how this goes now that the world is starting to wake up to a "much of the AI hype is unwarranted" reality.
Boeing: "HOW ARE THEY DOING IT?!"
Airbus: "We bought a torque wrench?"
Boeing: "No, how are you being a featured customer testimonial at #GoogleCloudNext?"
Airbus: "Oh, that? We made a strategic decision to not be walking poster children for corporate negligence."
And now, some DevOps / SRE / Sysadmin / Ops / ENOUGH already tips I learned from early in my career--brought to us by our friends at Chex™ Mix. All of these are great ideas that you should implement immediately...
DNS is notoriously unreliable, so use configuration management to sync all of the servers' /etc/hosts files. Boom, no more single point of failure.
Future-proofing is an early optimization, so don't do it. Every network should be a /24 because that's how developers think. I mean come on, what are the odds you'll ever have more than 253 hosts in a network?
And the Amazon earnings are out for Q4. A miss on @awscloud revenue by $20 million because analysts didn't expect one of you to turn off a single Managed NAT Gateway.
Let's explore deeper into their press release.
For 2023, AWS sold $90.8 billion of services, most of which were oversized EC2 instances because you all refuse to believe Compute Optimizer when it tells you there are savings to be had if you're just a smidgen more reasonable.
Word frequency in the earnings release:
Customer: 87
Employee: 11
Generative: 16
Cloud: 24
Serverless: 3
DynamoDB: 2
Union: 0
It's once again the most wonderful time of the year: the newly-renamed @Gartner_inc Magic Quadrant for Strategic Cloud Platform Services!
This year there are no visionaries or challengers, just "cloud" vs. "you pretend to be a cloud." Let's explore together!
We're going to ignore the "niche players" because for three of them I don't speak Mandarin, and for @IBMcloud I don't speak ancient Greek.
That leaves @awscloud, @Azure, @googlecloud, and @OracleCloud.
@IBMcloud @awscloud @Azure @googlecloud @OracleCloud First up is AWS due to its undisputed alphabetical supremacy.
Strengths include its "everything but the kitchen sink" approach, its innovation in hardware design, and its large feeding ground--I mean, partner ecosystem.
Amazon Q / "an AWS spokesmodel" is easily proving incredibly, incredibly helpful at answering the @awscloud questions its human predecessors in corporate comms refused to address.
According to an AWS spokesmodel, EC2, S3, and DynamoDB have all seen price increases. I did not know that!
I was missing a handful of these on my deprecation list; thanks, AWS spokesmodel! You're incredibly helpful!