I feel sick. Just saw a boy, maybe 4, on an elevator in a hosp bldg. Bilateral implants. He was yelling a bit, clearly having feelings. I tried to sign a little w/ him (hello, dodo?). Mom angrily says “we are trying to get him to speak, he just falls bk on sign too easily.”
It all happened so fast. (mom also said his sign is minimal so he will speak) They’re suddenly off the elevator. I know what I saw is just a moment. But imagine yr kid, unable to tell you what they need, want, feel bc you only want them to tell you those things in a certain way.
I’m writing these tweets while processing what just happened, shaking and weeping on a NYC street corner.
TBC, the sounds he was making were not intelligible speech. She said they were trying to GET HIM to talk. He’s 4! How many yrs of missed, precious toddler conversations were lost? I am so done w/ #LanguageDeprivation. Listen to deaf people, my god.
I will never forget his face peering back at me in the elevator as mom is dragging him away-I’m signing “Hope to see you later” to him. He’s looking at me, I’m not sure he’s understanding me, but he’s still for a moment and looking. Then the doors closed. 😭
Hrs later I still have lots of feelings. I’ve spent my career critiquing ableist systems that made this moment possible. Wrote a whole book on CIs & deaf kids. I’ve always steered clear of attacking parents b/c I think ppl do what they think is right, what they think is care...
...but it was such a clear moment: this parent had been so enculturated into a therapeutic imperative, into a need to fix...and all I could see was a child in distress b/c of it. When will we collectively see the harm this does? I encourage folks to listen to disabled people &
Read the work of deaf scholars and just listen to deaf people more generally. If you need some to follow here’s a start: @wyattehall @DeafHistorian @jmhenner @jaceyhill @realcaunsia @chrisunkim
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
