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Dr Evil

25 May, 9 tweets, 2 min read

🧵🧵

New ACLS protocols courtesy of #wokemedpearls. We have been doing ACLS all wrong forever. As an example, just a few years ago this was typical…

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2/ EMS Unit on radio: Unit 23 to General... Coming in lights & sirens with a 45 year old male in cardiac arrest, V-fib shocked twice at 360, two IV lines, Epi 1mg in, intubated and bagging, and STEMI on our quick 12 lead, compressions ongoing, arrival 10 minutes, STEMI ALERT!
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3/ UNIVERSITY ER: Copy 23. Transmit 12-lead asap. Cath team will be ready. Update us if changes to the positive or negative.
=>

4/ HERE IS YOUR UPDATED ACLS PROTOCOL INTERACTION…

#wokemedpearls

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5/ EMS Unit on radio: Unit 23 to General, we are coming in lights and sirens with a 45 year old male in cardiac arrest, V-fib shocked twice at 360, two IV lines, epi 1mg in, intubated and bagging, and STEMI on our quick 12 lead, compressions ongoing, arrival 10m, STEMI ALERT! =>

6/

Dr Evil: Unit 23, please say again gender.

EMS: Male

Dr Evil: No, gender, you ignoramus.

EMS: Uh, … biological male??

Dr Evil: Thats better but did you ask family about his gender?

EMS: No sir, they were freaking out.

=>

7/

Dr Evil: Sir? That’s one helluva assumption.

EMS: Uh… uh… sorry Dr Evil… V-fib again… shocking…. Nope, still no pulses.

Dr Evil: Pronouns?

EMS: Dr Evil?

Dr Evil: WHAT ARE THE PATIENT’S PRONOUNS??

EMS: (whispering heard) Uh… ‘he, him, uh… his?’

Dr Evil: Copy

=>

8/

EMS: Dr Evil this patient is not responding to shocks we are starting Amiodarone now.

Dr Evil: Medic 23, does this patient have guns in their home?

EMS: Huh?

Dr Evil: GUNS! GUNS YOU FUCKING DOLT! SHOOTY-THINGS! PULL TRIGGER GO BOOM!!

EMS: Not that we know of, Dr Evil

=>

9/

Dr Evil: Did you ask the family?

EMS: Uh… no... Shocking again at 360 and CPR continues… Dr Evil we are pulling up to your door.

Dr Evil: Social work team ready. Come see me in the office. We need to have a hard conversation.

EMS: .

//

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Dr Evil

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How do you perform a testicular exam on a birthing-person? #wokemedpearls. Daunting right? The lack of a scrotum and testes, however, should not dissuade you from performing this exam. Testicular cancer is devastating if the diagnosis is missed. Here's how I perform this exam =>

2/ Expect some puzzled looks at first. Many birthing-persons are expecting a speculum exam of the so-called 'vagina'. Explain the necessity of a testicular exam and the consequences missing the diagnosis of testicular cancer. "But, Doctor, I don't have testicles!" =>

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Cue the following insane Tweets:
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3. Add your own...

Yaaaaas!

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Dr Evil

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11 Jun 20

@molratty

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Dr Evil

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26 Oct 19

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@JoeSilverman7

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