Thread by @mellyfratelli

I've realised that I've just skipped past the point where I abandoned ship last year. Might as well officially recommence the #sexandthecitymarathon.

https://twitter.com/mellyfratelli/status/1253087250231046145

I'm actually 4 eps ahead but not much has happened - Aidan has justifiably dumped Carrie the Cheat, Charlotte has married Trey, and we've had guest stars Vince Vaughan, Carrie Fisher, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Matt McConaughey, Kat Dennings and Hugh Hefner. #sexandthecitymarathon

S3 E16 - Frenemies. Carrie actually had the NERVE to teach a seminar on how to meet men, despite acknowledging that she is clueless and completely unqualified. Quite rightly, the customers call her out for her BULLSHIT. This is how I look at her, too. #sexandthecitymarathon

The girls are often horrible towards Samantha. She was on the money about Charlotte here, but Miranda and Carrie refused to get involved. They're jealous of Sam. #sexandthecitymarathon

Samantha doesn't even need an apology. It's the second time she has been slut shamed by Charlotte, but she's just happy to have her friend back. Samantha is worth her weight in gold. #sexandthecitymarathon

S3 E17 - What Goes Around, Comes Around. Carrie can't believe someone would hate her for ruining their marriage and teeth. Clueless.

There are a few references to American Beauty in this episode. Other than them being out at a similar time, I don't know why.

This Bridget Moynahan speech was 👩‍🍳's 💋 #sexandthecitymarathon

The outfits are getting good, though. Carrie just showed up to ruin Natasha's lunch in the Dior newspaper dress.

Might as well finish the season. S3 E18 - Cock-a-doodle-do. It's a really awkward watch in hindsight, due to the transphobia. Also, I don't know why Miranda is so stressed that the take-out lady knows her order. I'd love it if my Thai place remembered me. #sexandthecitymarathon

I forgot how infuriating Carrie is in this episode. Firstly, despite not giving Aidan a second thought in the interim, Carrie is shocked to find that Aidan is doing well and has moved on. How very dare he?! #sexandthecitymarathon

Secondly, Carrie's 'radical... earth shattering thought' that the problem is not with the men, but with her? Dr G told her this in S2 E13, but she was too busy tashing on with Jon Bon Jovi and dispelling therapy to listen. Silly cow. #sexandthecitymarathon

Need something to do just it's own thing on the telly while I paint my nails and fix my shades. Season 4 E1 - The Agony & the Ex-Stacy. Kristin Davis' monologue at the start is pitch perfect. #sexandthecitymarathon

S4 E2 - The Real Me. It's the Heidi Klum fashion road kill episode!!!! Hahahahhaha. #sexandthecitymarathon

In addition to Heidi Klum, this episode also features Margaret Cho, Alan Cumming, Kevyn Aucoin and Orlando Pita!

I know I'm incredibly materialistic myself, but Carrie is a dick-end.

Oh, I forgot that Gucci tux wearing Ed Koch was in this ep!

S4 E3 - Defining Moments. This is the one where Trey refers to Charlotte's 'damn fine' ass. We love a Peaks reference!

Oh no, this is the episode where Carrie dates the pork pie hat jazz guy. I can't believe that when I was like, 14, I thought I'd grow up to hang out in jazz bars and pick up weirdo men in bad hats. I read this guy was offered Chandler Bing and turned the role down.

Oh no (x2), this is the episode where Samantha enters onto a period of temporary lesbianism. No slight on Sonia Braga, although the writing for this storyline was some lazy bullshit.

S4 E4 - What's Sex Got To Do With It? I really identified with Miranda in this episode because she swears off men and eats a shitload of cake.

Kyle MacLachlan became an actor so he could utter the line:
'Next time I'm hard, would you consider measuring my John Thomas?'- getyarn.io/yarn-clip/913d… #sexandthecitymarathon

S4 E5 - Ghost Town. Trey and Bunny deserved their own spin-off. I don't think it's too late. @Kyle_MacLachlan

#sexandthecitymarathon

Samantha briefly becoming a lesbian was definitely one of the laziest storylines, although Sonia Braga smashing all the plates was great #sexandthecity

And OF COURSE Carrie sees Aidan and wants him back after barely giving him a second thought. She's truly the WORST.

S4 E6 - Baby, Talk Is Cheap. It's the tuckus lingus episode, where Carrie signs up to AOL as shoegal and then makes a total tit of herself outside of Aidan's apartment. Get a grip, you silly cow. #sexandthecitymarathon

Oh, and here comes Aidan to get himself let down by her again. He can get in the bin as well. Albert Einstein would have called this insanity.

S4 E7 - Time and Punishment. Aka the one where Carrie is actually stressed that her shitty treatment of Aidan may have lasting consequences. Imagine that. #sexandthecitymarathon

I'd totally have supported Charlotte's choice to quit work. Why would you choose to work if you didn't have to? Who dreams of having to work their whole life? I'd be like: 'GOOD FOR YOU, BESTIE'. #sexandthecity

If I were Miranda, I'd have been grateful that Aidan came to help me, despite my naked vulnerability. Carrie's solipsism would have offered nothing in this crisis. #sexandthecitymarathon

....evidenced with Carrie's bullshit bagel apology, which was just an excuse to offload all her relationship shit onto Miranda while she is in pain. Horrible human, horrible friend. #sexandthecitymarathon

'You have to forgive me!'. No, girl. He doesn't. You fucked your ex all over town behind this guy's back. You wrote about it in your damn column. And then you flatly refused to keep Big out of your life after Aidan took you back. So no, he doesn't have to forgive you.

S4 E8 - My Motherboard, My Self. Carrie's boyfriend (who she cheated on) made her fajitas, took an interest in her work, bought her a new Macbook so she could keep working when hers died, and offered to accompany her to a funeral. And she was a bitch to him???? #sexandthecity

And I have to say, the cackhanded comparisons of loss in this episode are incredible. Miranda's mother literally DIES and this is on a par with Carrie's laptop breaking and Sam not being able to come. This show is.... Too much 😂 😂 #sexandthecitymarathon

The scene where the sales assistant in the bra shop consoles Miranda is really sweet. Had a little cry. #sexandthecity

S4 E9 - Sex and the Country. Carrie is so ungrateful. Her nice boyfriend has a dog and a country home in the forest by a lake, and all she can do is complain. Set this man free. #sexandthecity

Everything with Bunny and Trey is utterly marvellous. #SexandtheCity

Shattered after too much sunshine & football.

S4 E10 - Belles of the Balls. It's the Batman v Green Hornet episode, where Miranda takes Steve shopping for a prosthetic bollock and Sam meets Richard Wright (James Remar, not the Everton keeper). #UniballBartender #sexandthecity

Carrie invites Big to Aidan's holiday home (!!!!). Big shows up (!!!!). Aidan has the opportunity to let Big drive off steaming and crash into a tree, but doesn't let that happen. Two bastards and an angel. #sexandthecity

Obviously, Batman and the Green Hornet end up having a straightener and it's pathetic.

S4 E11 - Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda. The ep where Miranda is pregnant and doesn't want to be, and Charlotte is not pregnant and is desperate to be. More importantly, it features Sam, Lucy Liu and the Birkin. #sexandthecity

'If it's so hard to get pregnant, how do you account for the number of crying children on planes?'

There is no way this show works without Samantha. #sexandthecity

I can not even BELIEVE Carrie told Aidan - STEVE'S FRIEND - about Miranda being pregnant and wanting an abortion. Except I can, because Carrie can't keep her own shit. Talk about doing the dirty on three people in one fell swoop. Asshat. I hate you, Carrie.

....and then she just goes shopping in this stupid bandana.

Sam repping Twin Peaks.

Lucy Lui as herself in #sexandthecity

I totally forgot that Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda is the episode with the white sun dress and parasol. A Carrie CLASSIC. #sexandthecity

And so, Miranda decides to stay pregnant and her friends all support her. We're soon to meet Brady Hobbes-Brady, the world's most ginger baby.

Go on, one more before bedtime. S4 E12 - Just Say Yes. Carrie finds the ugly engagement ring that Miranda helped Aidan pick out. Charlotte and Trey go to the Scottish Society's Highland Fling and Bunny (unsurprisingly) outs herself as a massive old racist. #sexandthecity

S4 E13 - The Good Fight. It's 'long, pink, amazing' Richard Wright penis talk ep. #SexandtheCity

OMG OMG, it's the cardboard baby ep! @Kyle_MacLachlan was brilliant in this. Trey was so wrong. So very wrong. Yet oh so, right 😂 #SexandtheCity

S4 E14 - All That Glitters. Carrie is *especially* unrelatable in this disorder. Her boyfriend is happy to stay in with takeaways and football, but she just wants to go out to ~clubbing~, like the oldest swinger in the town 🥱

This bitch.

If someone woke me from my slumber just to tell me they had five cocktails and a goody bag of gay porn, I'd absolutely fucking kill them. Go away, Carrie. People here are trying to sleep. #sexandthecity

"It's gay porn... I thought you said we were watching an independent film. I brought biscotti"

I love Charlotte. #sexandthecity

S4 E15 - Change of a Dress. In this episode, Charlotte takes up tap (my gal 🙌). Samantha remarks, on Carrie's marriage jitters 'You get married and hope for the best. If it doesn't work out you'll get divorced. You can take tap with Bojangles over here'. #sexandthecity

Carrie has an unnecessary but relatable fit in the ugly dress shop. She's a bitch to Aidan, though. Rejects all his nice wedding ideas, tries to hide her lovely engagement ring (after he had to change it), and then forgets to tell Susan-Sharon she's engaged!

Speaking of dresses, a moment of silence for these dresses that Carrie and Sam wear to Richard Wright's black and white ball. #sexandthecity

S4 E17 A Vogue Idea. Carrie gets drunk at Vogue because she ignored the brief, submitted a garbage article and can't take criticism. This is supposed to be your Mecca! Show some respect. #sexandthecity

Samantha - once again, following season 1 - exits a baby shower on her own terms.

'Ladies can we cut the cake and get out of here? I have a three way to go to' #SATC

This is the first ep to feature Candice Bergen as Vogue editor Enid. IRL, he daughter works for Vogue 👗

Ron Rifkin plays the scamp who gets Carrie drunk, pretends to be her mate and then tries to cheat on his wife with her in the shoe cupboard. #SATC

S4 E18 - I Heart NY. Carrie expects a guy who barely gave her a thought when they were together to be considerate to her after they're not. I can't believe this woman taught us stuff and we just lapped it up. #sexandthecity

Why would you want Carrie 'everything is about me' Bradshaw in the room with you when a baby child is battering it's way out of your hoo har? Couldn't think of anything worse. #SATC

Samantha wearing a wig from the Raquel Welch wig line in order to catch Richard cheating is one of my favourite moments. This show is nothing without Kim Cattrall. #sexandthecity via @YouTube

S5 W1 Anchors Away
Mercifully, this season is only 8 episodes long because SJP was pregnant.
I think this is my least favourite episode. I hate Carrie's hair. #SATC

They did such a bad job of making us feel for Miranda in this episode. The stressed out, first time mum thing isn't quite as effective when the character has a housekeeper and a baby nurse. No disrespect to Queen Magda, ofc. #SATC

💉 💉 💉 💉 #sexandthecity

This lot really think they can continue without Samantha Jones? I don't think so. #satc

You wanna talk about people who deserve an Emmy for a guest performance? Everybody say 'hello Sylvia Miles'

I fully expect to grow into this woman who sprinkles lithium on her ice cream. #satc

S5 E2 Unoriginal Sin #SATC

'the truth is, in these troubled times, the Catholic Church is like a desperate 36-year-old single woman - willing to settle for anything it can get'

No group of people is safe from this show 👀

Carrie's fascinator also offends me.

Shitty stuff Carrie does in this ep

- Mocks Sam for accepting Richard's excuses, when she ate up everything Big ever said to her
- Is wounded Sam doesn't read her column, yet never asks her friends about their work, & abuses their experiences for her own

Silly woman. #satc

S5 E3 Luck Be An Old Lady
We're off to Atlantic Titty, where Carrie will spend the whole trip being really annoying because when she's single, she has a violent tendency to get the band back together. I HATE HER HAIR. #satc

S5 E4 Cover Girl
Carrie Bradshaw really has the audacity to call herself a sexual anthropologist when spends a large portion of her time slut shaming, judging and hating on people for their sexual relationships and preferences. What a wretched little woman.

Honestly, I'm glad Kim Cattrall decided not to return to Sex and the City. The friends never really appreciated Samantha; they were always looking down on her and sneering. She forgave them FAR too many times. Nonsense!

'Miranda's dating an over-eater, and he over-ate her' ruined Krispy Kremes forever #sexandthecity

S5 E5 Plus One is the Loneliest Number. This episode is notable for introducing Berger (played by Ron Livingstone, who deserved better). We're all invited to Carrie's book party, where she wears this hideous dress. #SATC

Carrie thinks she is being greeted by Enid, who is merely pointing out that Carrie is reading Hello magazine. It's a real issue from May 2002. The Beckhams are on the cover with Sven & Nancy, to promote their pre World Cup party (South Korea & Japan '02). #sexandthecity

At the end of the episode, Carrie's driver makes her feel special about her achievement of having a book published. They celebrate with a hot dog and it's so wholesome. They don't keep in touch, because the narrative has no space for a black friend with a regular job. #satc

S5 E6 - Critical Condition. Carrie (who has never had a problem passing judgement) isn't happy when she realises that some people react to her like a bad smell because of how she treated Aidan. That's right, bitch: even Heather Graham don't like you 🐒
#satc

This is the first ep to feature Evan Handler as Harry. Unfortunately, Charlotte is a bit of prick to him before she sees the light. You deserve better, but hang in there, son. #satc

More importantly, Samantha's vibrator is in the fritz. Thankfully, it's in warranty. She'll need that new one later when she's babysitting. #satc

I can't believe I've only just noticed, but the older woman in the vibrator shop is the woman looking for a 'black or Hispanic' threesome in the classifieds in the S1 E8 episode 'Three's a Crowd', although she's uncredited in this one! #SATC

S5 E7 - The Big Journey
Carrie expects Sam to drop everything to get the train to San Francisco (FROM NEW YORK) just so she can get laid? That is too much to ask of your wing woman. And obviously Sam agrees because she's the best friend out of the four. #satc

'I'm starting to understand why where was a murder on the Orient Express'

The journey is a lengthy trauma, offering little to do beyond getting shitfaced & offending the Amish.
#sexandthecity

I do love these fab fish bone earrings that Sam wears in The Big Journey. #satc