So i'll late night vent, lately I've been putting on a front of being happy, really i'm dealing with a good deal of anxiety over how inadequate i feel.
I'm still stuck in a job i thought i could get out of a year ago to something better, and as much as i'm saying im searching i lack that spark to drive me.
deep down sometimes I feel like i don't matter and a lot of people would be happier without me around, Personally i've felt like a burden on my family by still being stuck at home
truthfully I don't know what i'm doing anymore, life feels like im going through the motions and sometimes I'm left wondering if 'this is all there is'.
and I enjoy being the one getting ripped on during jokes but lately i've started believing that I am a bit of a loser (and im not blaming anyone for making jokes at my expense i encourage that shit cause 95% of the time its funny), but sometimes its just caused me to self loathe.
anyway this was my vent thread, ty for reading
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