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Aug 14, 2021 7 tweets 3 min read Read on X
I just watched Deep Shock (2003), a made-for-TV movie about wooden actors in an underwater facility made of plastic having a run-in with terrible CGI eels under the north pole. Image
The set is covered in plastic bowls painted silver, I guess to give it a sci-fi texture. Maybe they're supposed to be giant rivets or something. Image
The U.N. consists of twenty or so people sitting in a mostly empty concert hall. One guy who doesn't like Lead Lady's theory about smart eels or whatever just calls a vote to get her removed from her position, and they just decide it with a show of hands. Image
They spelled "losing" wrong. Image
The plot is kind of like a poor man's The Abyss. The bad guy even dies the same way by getting crushed inside a tiny submarine. Image
The U.N. sends a bunch of submarines from a bunch of different countries to launch nuclear torpedoes at an underwater trench, because apparently the U.N. can do that. Image
Deep Shock? More like Deep Schlock! Image

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More from @ReviewsPossum

Sep 18
A good character design is one you can look at and instantly know what they're all about without having to be told.

Would you have guessed that the character on the right is meant to be a healer?

I'm gonna look at the characters from Concord and see what I can guess about them.Image
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Keep in mind, I don't know anything about Concord's story or characters, so I'm trying to figure out what these characters are based purely on how they're designed. Tell me if I'm right.

Here we have some kind of lady in a hazmat suit holding a grenade launcher. Maybe she shoots poison gas. Perhaps she works as some kind of space bug exterminator.

In terms of gameplay, I'm gonna assume she's a support class who sets traps or uses area-of-effect weapons to deny the enemy team access to locations.Image
This appears to be some kind of disco lady with throwing knives. Maybe she can throw them in an arc over enemy barriers, or she has different types of knives that do different things when they hit targets.

I don't know why she's dressed that way. Image
Read 12 tweets
May 3
"WhEn YoU aDjUsT fOr InFlAtIoN, gAmEs ArE aCtUaLlY cHeApEr Now!"

THEY NEVER SHOULD HAVE BEEN OVER $50 IN THE FIRST PLACE.
"You don't understand! Games are so much more expensive to make now! See, we just have to have celebrity voice actors and Hollywood level visuals! We just can't turn a profit unless we sell you half a game for $70 and make you buy the rest as DLC, on top of microtransactions!"
This is the only industry where people will defend this kind of shit, by the way.

Do you know how much it costs to buy a ticket to see a one million-dollar movie? $10.

Do you know how much it costs to buy a ticket to see a $300 million movie? $10.
Read 4 tweets
Jan 30
I just watched the Hazbin Hotel pilot. I had seen it before, but I couldn't remember it.

I hate the art style. Almost every character design is like some kind of edgy DeviantArt OC. Most of them are overdesigned and make no sense. Image
Why does the Radio Demon have fox ears? He has no other animal features, and it makes me wonder if the only reason he has them is to make his silhouette more distinct. Aside from him carrying around a staff with a microphone, nothing about his design reflects his radio motif. Image
"Well, he's dressed in 1920s attire, and people listened to the radio back then, or something."

Half of the characters wear 1920s attire. And that's another thing. Why? It doesn't take place in the 1920s. Charlie has a smart phone. Image
Read 18 tweets
Dec 17, 2023
I keep telling you, the cyberpunk dystopia you're gonna get isn't gonna be Blade Runner.

It's gonna be Her.Image
This isn't a joke. There's a loneliness epidemic that's getting worse every year, and even though it's probably being caused by technology, we will become increasingly dependent on technology to cope with loneliness, to the point that entire industries will spring up around it.
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It's already happening in Japan. Image
Read 7 tweets
Nov 23, 2023
"We're not allowing ad blockers on YouTube anymore. Disable your ad blocker or you can't watch anything."

"Okay."

[Clicks on video. Waits for two pre-roll ads.]

"WHAT IS UP YOUTUBE! IT'S YOU'RE BO—"

[Mid-sentence ad break.]

—Y, YOUTUBE GUY! TODAY'S VID—"

[Another ad break.]
If a YouTuber doesn't specify their own ad breaks in a video, YouTube will just put ads on their video, whether or not the uploader wants them there, and they will just put them at random spots in the video, even less than 90 seconds apart.
I'm not even exaggerating. I just started a video, and after the pre-roll ad, it played another ad while the guy was in the middle of a sentence less than 90 seconds into the video.

This is why people use ad blockers. The internet is intolerable without one.
Read 4 tweets
Nov 14, 2023
"Well, people of Narnia, it's been fun, but we need to give up our royalty and go back to the human world for no fucking reason where we have to pay taxes and ride the subway."
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"Wow, Peter. I sure am glad that we gave up being the kings and queens of a magical kingdom to come back here." Image
"We could have been slamming prime faun puss right now, Peter. But that's okay. Riding public transportation and paying rent is cool too." Image
Read 7 tweets

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