Thread by @FinLitBae

I hope I can find the article I wrote around 2011 on “Your Own” in which I spoke about why it is important to have things in your own name. I do have notes I derived from it which I used a lot when speaking in churches at women’s events because it’s an actual problem.

So I would normally ask what are the things you have in your name? Usual responses are birth certificate, ID, some certificates. So my challenge would be add to that. I’ve tweeted before about women whose SIM cards are not even in their names. And they don’t own even a handset.

When we could travel I was very mobile because of my work - you buy vegetables pa Beatrice, pay via Ecocash and the name that appears is one David, and she cannot confirm receipt because Diva wacho is sitting pa local bottle store with the mbudzi phone. Drinking as he goes hake.

Anyway I would usually give ladies a list - in addition t certificates go get your own SIM card, handset, passport, laptop, bank accounts - set yourself up to receive money honey! The first place I spoke about CTrade was at UFIC women’s camp 2018 - get shares in your name!

And also add register companies in your name because you can register a PBC with just you as a shareholder. Then further formalize it by signing up for Zimra, opening a bank account, join associations, get a website & profile done, start pursuing women’s fund & apply for tenders

The idea was to make them understand that these things are all very legal and possible; especially for those who had non cooperative partners on money issues. I think the best way is to do things together but sadly that’s not what holds in most situations. So, cars even!

Sometimes what women needed was just to be given the freedom to reference that takazvidzidza ku church because they’d have been taught very differently - the man is the head so everything goes in his name. Very unfortunate teaching especially when the husband passes on. Dololo

We love and are moved by the movie Neria but those situations still happen. Mid 2018 I was invited to a church ladies meeting where I shared the podium with a wonderful lady lawyer she was then Netone corporate secretary and shared on property ownership. Keep in mind - Christians

She then shared the law as it was. Then challenged attendees : get your (literal) houses in order. It is ideal to own everything together so get your name on the land/house. In that room only one room was on deeds. Great shavings. Her challenge: go talk with your bae & regularize

The feedback after was disheartened. Born again baes were angry. (I always say kutendeuka doesn’t rid one of their cultural leanings). I will at this point ask - why would you not want to protect and provide for someone you (claim to) love in case of your demise? Eyes were opened

Let me add and say sometimes how people manage money in marriage is because they don’t know any better. But once you know why would you refuse to do better?! Red flag 🚩

The only remedy women would have would be to read the writing on the wall and do the responsible thing.

That would be to ensure her own future security. And that’s why there are women with whole stands and houses that are unknown because after starting the conversation with Giribheti - some will see sense and consolidate but others will refuse and you do the needful.

I also want to ask why would any one want to have a partner who has no agency zvekuti if something happens even your kids are left exposed. Thank God for gents who ensure their partners are covered and have their names on everything that matters. Love is practical mufunge.

I will reiterate my belief is that for married folk working together is the best case. And secure each other. If you cannot have that adult conversation and act accordingly then everyone will begin to look out for themselves due to lack of common vision. Overcommunicate on money!

Everyone I know who does they are deliriously happy. They move faster, invest more, kids and spouse future secure, they travel. And they have pocket money aplenty. Not wanting to disclose earnings is often a power issue - both ways. Indicator of no trust so it’s a matter of time

Before things go south. Many times unfortunately the person who refuses is the one who wants to do weird things with money. Rather share what your needs and wants are and meet in the middle. But my experience is the ones poor with money are usually the problems 🤣

The best person to manage money in a relationship is the one who is better at it. Many times havasi baba. Let’s appreciate that. Smart partners defer to the person arikuziva. That’s why some people thrive within a year of divorce or spouse death - handbrake gone, zvofamba.

And I will return to ladies and say it is not enough to say my needs are catered for. What happens if he stops because death, divorce, disability? In fact most women I know who say I’m covered are now stashing money enough for whole houses lol so hameno. Kudos sis I guess lol

In conclusion : it is healthy and safe for each individual to have things in their own name - or in both y’all’s names. Non negotiable. Trusts. Wills. Otherwise pane arikuvharwa kana kudyiwa chete. A final word for the single - don’t fear to progress in the name of marriage.

You will meet someone with the same mindset and variko. Circles are a reality. Fly economy you meet certain types, same with business class lol. Be with people who want you to prosper and have things in your name. Be ruthless with those who don’t get it, that’s not your crowd!

It’s not too late to talk money with your bae. Get their real thoughts and build together. If they do not align and you are not compatible financially do not commit. If you are already committed, make a plan.

As always : #ItWillEndInWealth

Also @maripodcastzw for $ podcasts!