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Sam Malin and the boy cat Lucy

13 Sep, 10 tweets, 2 min read

The Govt is v excited about the Oz trade deal. Here's a little thread abt the logistics of getting Oz fruit & veg to the UK. /1

Much of Oz's fruit & veg is grown a long way from cities in places like Mildura (look it up) where the weather/soil are perfect for agriculture. Product grown in Mildura is picked, packed and loaded onto trucks to be carried to Melbourne, the major container port /2

It is about an 7 hour drive from Mildura to Melbourne. The product is then put into refrigerated containers at the port when it sits for a couple of days while all the paperwork is completed and then it is loaded onto a ship. /3

The ship the takes about 21-24 days to get to the UK because it stops at various ports along the way to discharge and load other products. Once in the UK, the paperwork for customs etc then need to be checked before the product gets put onto a truck /4

Of course, we all know what the situation is in the Uk regarding availability of trucks. Anyway, it is now at least 4 weeks since the product was harvested. Assuming the refrigeration in the container continued to work, the product should still be fine. /5

But why the fuck would any UK business want to wait this amount of time for oranges, lemons or grapes ? What if the product was on that ship that got stranded in the Suez Canal ? The same product could arrive in the UK from Spain or Portugal within 24 hours of harvest. /6

None of our politicians or the Brexit Taliban every bothered to learn this basic stuff. So here we are. With empty shelves. Being sold a piss poor Oz trade deal as some panacea to cover up for the mess the Quitters have made of something they never understood. End.

PS. For any people with English flags in their bios, this was my job for years. So you can crawl back under the rock you live under.

PPS. Lots of people on here with experience in logistics can confirm I am not making this up. This is just how it works.

PPPS The cost of all this transport and associated insurance is included in the price. So, you can either have a 15 hour truck trip from Spain or a 5 week truck/ship/truck trip from Oz. I bet you can work out which is cheaper.

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More from @SamanthaMalin

Sam Malin and the boy cat Lucy

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10 Sep

A refugee story: I worked at a major Aussie law firm in the 90s. A Vietnamese refugee was working in the print room. A partner began talking to him. Turned out he was extremely well connected with the Vietnamese Govt. And I think he had been a lawyer too /1

Long story short, the firm saw an opportunity. It ended up being the first foreign law firm licensed to operate in Vietnam. And got the contract with the Vietnamese Govt to provide the official English language version of new foreign investment laws being enacted /2

I settled the English version of the Maritime Law. My one claim to legal fame. As the US embargo had not yet been lifted, the HK offices of global corporations came to us for advice. A hugely successful practice was born. /3

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A little story about food in Oz. Mass migration in the 50s & 60s was from Greece, Italy, & Croatia as well as the UK. Many were 'low skilled' so they bought cheap land outside the cities and started market gardens growing the food of their countries. /1

The climate and soil was perfect for citrus, veggies, fruit etc etc. Then the Vietnamese arrived in the 70s after the war and did the same thing with Asian veg. The Croatians started fishing businesses (tuna particularly). Many of these people are now incredibly rich. /2

Being extremely canny, they exploited the massive Asian market on their doorsteps. Aussie tuna sells for 100s of £ a kg in Japan. Almost all Big Macs in the Far East are Aussie beef. They made their own cheese. They made the food of their homes & sold it to the Oz market /3

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Sam Malin and the boy cat Lucy

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5 Jul

OK. A little thread, from an ex trade lawyer, about all these trade deals the Govt loves to trumpet. The reason the EU was good for the UK is because their companies and citizens are wealthy by world standards. /1

A trade deal with a really poor country offers the UK nothing unless we slash the costs of the goods and services we produce. That only decreases the wealth of the UK. /2

Go to any McDonalds in the Far East and the patty in your big Mac is probably Australian beef. Sold in enormous quantities to make it worthwhile for the Aussie farmers. But only in the richer Far East countries - Oz can't cut costs sufficiently for places like Nepal or Laos. /3

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Sam Malin and the boy cat Lucy

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I promised a short thread on increasing freight costs and its impact on the poorest in our community. So, here goes. Any followers who work in trade should wade in if I get anything wrong. /1

Most consumer goods from outside of the EU arrive in the UK via container ship. TVs, trainers, clothes, etc etc etc. Trade between private companies is covered by a set of rules known as INCOterms which cover the obligations of buyers and sellers. /2

So, Company A (in the UK) buys products from Company B in, say, China. They agree which INCOterm (there are about 13) is going to cover the sale so both parties know their obligations and their risks. /3

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Sam Malin and the boy cat Lucy

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31 Aug 20

Apricot chicken: Sweat off a chopped onion and then brown whatever cut of chicken you are using (not wings but anything else is fine - I use breasts but drumsticks are probably best). Put into an oven proof dish. Add 1 or 2 cans of apricot halves with the juice.

Then add apricot nectar or some apricot jam. You want enough liquid for the sauce but don't drown the chicken. Add ground ginger to taste (this is the most important bit) and stir through the liquid. Cover and bake.

Once the chicken is cooked through & the apricot halves are starting to fall apart, it's done ! I like to thicken the sauce with a bit of flour but you don't have to. Serve over rice. Dead easy and really tasty. Adjust ginger and the level of apricot in the sauce to yr taste.

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Sam Malin and the boy cat Lucy

@SamanthaMalin

3 Jul 20

Why the UK Arts sector matters - A thread.

I lived in Budapest. No many UK people know that Budapest is used as an overflow when Pinewood etc are too busy. They shoot TV and movies including Hollywood blockbusters there. /1

For example, did you see Die Hard 5 ? 47 Ronin ? The BBC version of the Musketeers ? All filmed in Hungary.

The behind the scenes people for these productions were almost exclusively from the UK. Carpenters, hairdressers, musicians, camera operators. /2

I met many of them at pubs in Budapest (usually watching the football) . Not stars, but crafts people who could work there (thanks to freedom of movement) for 2 days or 6 months. Well, we fucked that up for them entirely. /3

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