Here's what Rosh Hashana looked like. (Don't worry about the missing checks--everything got made but the 2 things I decided I didn't need.)
(This is as close as I get to frum-woman-Instagram.)
Okay, granted, I'm up late and not being productive, but this is a fascinating (to me) document. The recipe sources represented here:
My mother (only 2 recipes of hers I make regularly)
My sister-in-law
Kosher. com from one of the frum magazines
NYTimes food section (x3)
cont'd
Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything (a Bible)
Ruth Reichl's Gourmet Cookbook
allrecipes. com
Peas, Love, and Carrots
Susie Fishbein "Kosher"s (x2)
bag of black rice (recipe on back)
King Arthur flour website
and one I kind of made up.
The proportion of family-tradition-to-found-recipes and Jewish-to-general cookbooks are both about standard for my cooking. As is the relative scarcity of non-recipes--I'm a by-the-numbers cook.
Forgot! The Rika Breuer's Teachers' Seminary cookbook! The only recipe I make from that cookbook, which is otherwise a lot of honey/orange marmalade/mustard/soy sauce kinds of chicken. But props to a neighborhood institution!
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
Following up on @DBashIdeas, the Jewish Action issue, and @themishpacha supplement that I haven't read yet, I want to say one thing about cost-of-frum-life discussions: enormously underrated in this conversation is the choice of where to live--*not* in the cost-of-living sense.
In the setting your barometer of what's normal, acceptable, adequate, and setting your kids' barometer of what's normal, acceptable, adequate.
I think people consider a lot of factors when they choose a community in which to live and raise a family, and "how will this set our family's materialism-barometer" is not necessarily one of them.
As someone who lived through the awful days of March and April of 2020 in New York City, I cannot believe that a political movement made an active choice to replicate what we suffered through.
My son is an EMT. At one point, they received orders that if a cardiac arrest patient couldn't be resuscitated outside the hospital, they should be pronounced dead and not brought to the hospital for further treatment--resources couldn't be spared.
FOX hosts and GOP electeds chose this for their listeners and constituents.
אֶת־חֲטָאַ֕י אֲנִ֖י מַזְכִּ֥יר הַיּֽוֹם
I was once Mr. Logic Man. Everything was a debating society point; if I could argue my way around you I was right and you were wrong. (And I could usually argue my way around you.)
Not only were lived experience and feelings irrelevant, introducing them into the conversation proved the weakness of an argument that could not stand up to the rigors of reasoned debate.
(If this sounds like a whole lot of frum internalized misogyny, you are absolutely right.)
I remember in college at some point getting into a vigorous argument with someone about how disabled people would be best served by robust Access-A-Ride programs that would give them rides places, rather than retrofitting public transit stations. Cost/benefit analysis, you see.
The ad hominems aren't worth addressing (and if I'm the staunchest proponent of abortion you know you should probably get out more), but there's something here that's either misinformed or dishonest, and is important to point out.
I know two married frum women--by know, I don't mean "heard about"; I mean "see/speak to weekly"--who terminated pregnancies for fetal abnormalities incompatible with life. They did so under the guidance of the greatest poskim in my community.
In one case, the pregnancy was the result of an expensive, physically arduous, and emotional taxing IVF process. Every day she carried the pregnancy with the doomed fetus was a day that she was suffering through well-wishes for the "finally!" pregnancy that wasn't viable.
August 28th is my birthday. It's also the anniversary of the day I learned about my stillbirth fourteen years ago. (Never schedule a doctor's/midwife's appointment on your birthday--you may 1. change the day forever and 2. never be able to forget the date when.)
(Otherwise perfectly normal pregnancy; we'd passed the standard 18-20 week anatomy scan with flying colors. I found out about the fetal death when the midwife couldn't get a heartbeat on the Doppler. Nothing discernible happened--testing revealed no genetic abnormalities.)
That experience--the decisions I had to make then (deliver a dead baby? Go under general anesthesia and have them extract a dead baby from my unconscious body? Yes, this is awful, but these are the decisions that have to be made),
Years later, I met a student who had been in that first class that I taught. She said, "You know what I remember that you taught us? You taught us that people didn't evacuate New Orleans because Katrina hit on the 29th and they didn't have enough money left to fill up on gas."
(Or to buy bus tickets, or for motels....Evacuating costs money, and if you live paycheck-to-paycheck, you don't have a lot of it on the 29th of a 31-day month.)