Different Categories of Road Crossers

1. The Strict Disciplinarian : The person who always follows all the rules. Crosses only at Zebra Crossings. Obeys all Signals.

2. The Hand Raiser: The person who expects the Red Sea to part when they raise their hands. Traffic is nothing.
3. The Darter : The person who darts from behind cars, trucks, and any other obstacles, expecting to pass thru any vehicle that dares to come in front of them.

4. The Steeplechaser : Person who missed out on Olympics, so they practice jumping over dividers on the highway
5. The Ghost: The one who is invisible, walks in the middle of the highway only at night, and decides to shift to the middle of the road, when you are right behind him. You only see him at the last nano second.
6. The Mobile Guy : The guy who is totally engrossed, playing PUBG, Candy Crush and has decided that clearing the level is more important than his life and the truck that will take it.

They totally trust the vehicles on the road to understand their priorities and respect it.

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More from @thekaipullai

24 Nov
Different Categories of Two Wheeler Riders in India

1. The Carrier : The person the thinks the 2 in Two wheeler is just a suggestion. Be it rain or shine there are never less than 4 people on his bike

When you see from behind there are only 2. But 2 more are squeezed in between
The Kamikaze : The people in this category are reincarnations of Japanese Kamikaze pilots from WW2. They will dive at your vehicle, from all directions, mostly at the last minute.

The Kamikaze Pilots used to have a siren. These guys have horns.
The Gap Finder : These guys are experts in finding gaps where none exist. If even one cm of edge of their tire fits in a gap, they usually drive the bike thru it. A few broken side mirrors or bruises to Pedestrians, is just collateral damage in their quest to conquer the gap.
Read 6 tweets
22 Nov
The year is 2059. China's economy is in trouble. Years of reckless spending and debt, is causing massive Unrest in the countryside. The hold of the Communist party is becoming tenous, by the day. They need to do something to sort it out.
Under the Guise of a Naval Exercise a huge Fleet sails from Yulin Base in China towards the Arabian Sea.

As India is in the middle of some protest against the Govt for not allowing the Farmers to trade in USD, the Fleet is ignored.

Then suddenly the Fleet turns towards Mumbai
Chinese launch a full fledged invasion of Mumbai, hoping to curtail the financial muscle of India and divert attention from the domestic problems.

Initial invasion is successful, though Chinese incur some casualties by accidentally consuming Mumbai's Chinese food.
Read 5 tweets
22 Nov
1947 : India is a newly independent country, which has just shaken off 300 years of slavery. Everything is now free, except Saki Naka, where there is a traffic jam.

1975: India is a socialist hellhole. Basically a depressing place like Saki Naka, where there is a traffic jam
1992: Newly liberalised country with a lot of economic potential. There is optimism in the air. Except in Saki Naka, where there is a traffic jam

2011 : India has just won the world cup. IPL is expanding. Most people are happy, except the ones stuck in a Traffic Jam at Saki Naka
2020: Things are looking OK. India is rapidly driving towards a $5 Trillion dollar economy, except the ones stuck in a Saki Naka Traffic jam.

2047: India is finally the 2nd largest economy in the world. We are welcomed everywhere. Except Saki Naka, where there is a Traffic jam.
Read 4 tweets
16 Nov
South Seas Trading company was a joint stock company, was formed in 1711 at the peak of the war of the Spanish Succession.

South Seas, at that time referred to the continent of South America, which was majorly controlled by Spain and Portugal.
But the fun part was, when the company was formed, the company had no business. Yes, the British Govt gave it the sole trading rights for slaves in the South Seas, but, as the area was controlled by Spain, no trade was possible.
The War ended but nothing happened.

Then the Brits and Spanish fought another war. That war ended in 1720.

Now that peace came, South Seas went to town saying they had sole rights for all the gold booty that was there in the South Seas.
Read 10 tweets
20 Oct
Jarasandha, the ruler of Magadha, was one of the most powerful rulers in that era. He was also the Father in Law of Kansa.

Now when Kansa was killed by Krishna, a side effect was to anger Jarasandha. He vowed to kill the guy who widowed his daughter.
As Kauravas later found out later, it was not an easy task.

But Jarasandha didn't give up. Some say, he attacked 23 times. He was defeated every single time.

Yet didn't give up.

He formed an alliance and decided to attack Mathura again from all directions.
By This time Lord Krishna realized the suffering his people were going thru

So he decided enough was enough and retreated to Dwarka

Some people called him a coward. They named him "Ranchod", means a guy who runs away from the battlefield

Some pointed this out to Lord Krishna
Read 7 tweets
9 Oct
Whenever a customer facing, distribution driven company folds up, like the company that used to make LuvIT chocolate or starts brazenly adopting devious tactics due to the crookedness of the Top Management, like Oyo, the people I genuinely feel sad about, are the front line staff
They are on boarded with the premise that they are working for a legit company with lofty ambitions

They leverage their personal relationships with distributors & retailers to get business off the ground in their areas

And when they go belly up, they are left holding the fire.
The top management makes enough money to survive for the next seven generations. And if some one questions them, they simply blame the front line guy and move on. But these front line staff get nothing.

In fact many of them see their bridges burnt, for no fault of theirs.
Read 4 tweets

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